"The Adventures of the Four Asians and a
It all started when Andy and Toan were born in a meteorite. The
Neanderthals were the first civilization to die by us. When we
first met them, they were naked, so we gave them clothes. When
they got ahold of them they did something so disrespectful… They
chewed it and spit it out on us! They also didn't have anyone the
name Andy and Toan in their
species. We hunted most of
them down. Little did we
know, they dug underground and lived there for years until we got
bored. Onced bored reeked of us, they attacked! They threw mud,
dirt, sticks, and they spat at us. They were too dumb and kept
missing , so we waited and they killed themselves.
There was only one left, so we kept him as a pet, but he died
while we were walking in the jungle by a pet rock whose owner was
a Mesopotamian. We knew this could be worth dollars to us, so we
decided to sue him. On the day August 1, 1000 BC, we went to
court, and the judge was a guy named Francisco Barajas II. After
we got the money, we avenged our pet Neanderthal by killing all
the Mesopotamians. We didn't know Francisco was a Mesopotamian,
so we spared him. He could not live with alone, so he ran and
jumped into the ocean. He fell into a wormhole and was lost to
the fabric of time. Although we didn't know, he had a baby with a
jaguar and out came Francisco Barajas III. Francisco remembered
his name, because his father gave him a name tag when he was
Ages past and we were captured by the Egyptian Empire; we were
going to be sacrificed, but a mysterious man helped us escape the
prison. We soon knew he was Francisco Barajas VI, because he had
a name tag, he said it was a tradition created by his great
grandfather. We kept him alive and brought him along to our
adventure and to kill all the Egyptians. We killed them in their
sleep one-by-one, the last one was hard to kill, because he hired
mercenaries. We managed to do it by waiting for them to use the
bathroom and slipped under the last Egyptian's bed and running a
knife through the bed and into his heart.
The Death of Francisco VI
Although Francisco wasn't immortal, so we tried to look for
magical items for immortality. We gave him a mysterious apple,
but it just gave men on Earth lumps on their necks. We framed a
guy named Adam. We found this fountain, it was called the
Fountain of Youth, we used it as decoration for our mansion, we
had no idea what it did. Years later, Francisco Barajas VI had
passed away, but had a child named Francisco Barajas VII.
Strangely enough, we never found his mother and realized all his
ancestors before him had wives who left him.Only the three of us
attended his funeral, Francisco VII's mom was a dog and didn't
live very long. We trained him every day and he was the strongest
Francisco in his bloodline. We left our beloved home in seek of
adventure, blood, and a good story to tell.
More ages past and the Romans captured us in our sleep. They put
us in the coliseum to dance and fight lions and other people. We
were too smart for them, so we dared them," I bet you can't turn
the water mode on!" Emperor Diocletian got mad so he did it,
thinking we were going to drown. Little did he know. We farted in
his water and he drank and died. Later, people thought he died of
illness. Now you know the real reason of his death.
With the help of Francisco we destroyed the coliseum, by setting
fire to the coliseum and blamed it on the Celtics. We ran to the
north and met the Goths and Visigoths and set their huts on fire
with some leftover stakes. Francisco farted, and drew them away
into attacking Rome and winning the war. Francisco was stabbed in
the hand, so we had to run away and miss all the blood letting.
We settled on Mount Vesuvius and learned of the Byzantine Empire.
Byzantine Empire's Downfall
When we got there they tried to steal Toan's hotdog, Toan got so
mad he set half the empire on fire with his stakes. Andy lost his
spaghetti and Francisco and Toan saw the pure rage in his eyes.
They were blood red and Toan felt fear strike his throat. Andy
had taken out his spork and before everyone knew it he had
bloodedly murdered fifty-nine warriors with a single slash of a
spork. Francisco's tacos got stolen, even Andy felt fear and the
chill go down his spine, his jaguar heart had taken over his body
and slashed almost every building in half. Toan was so scared he
set fire to more buildings, but got overrun by 66 soldiers and
got captured. Andy got overrun by 368 soldiers, and was captured.
It was all up to Francisco, but his jaguar heart wore off and he
was scared again. Francisco fled the scene with fear.
Francisco had ran into the forest and saw a jaguar. Something
seemed awfully and strangely familiar and about the jaguar. It
had his brown eyes, his hair weird spotted hair, and his weird
finally hit him it was his long lost cousin. His cousin was stuck
and suffering to a trap. He tried to free her and when Francisco
touched her, he felt a strange energy fill his body. He suddenly
slashed the trap in half. Francisco had learned to controlled the
power that caused his father, grandfather, and generations before
their deaths. He was now ready to take on the Byzantine.
Francisco marched to the Byzantine and slashed the gates in half.
The guards were next to feel his wrath: Francisco had ferociously
cut them in half and moved on. He went to the dull, dark prison
and cut it in half. Francisco had a flashback. His cousin warned
him of this and advised, "With great power comes with great
responsibilities." Francisco kept abusing the power and had cut
down so many trees, so his cousin took away his powers. Francisco
had destroyed another trap and his cousin gave him his powers
back. "Yu had regained your honor" she said. Before he knew it he
saw Andy and Toan in a dark cell. Andy was using the toilet and
told Francisco," STOP LOOKING!" Andy and Toan didn't believe his
story. We looked around, the Byzantine Empire was no more, and
almost looked like it never existed.
After many years have passed, we turned to sailors and were hired
by a man named Ferdinand Magellan. He said he wanted to see what
happens when you reached the end, we already knew what was there,
but we just went along with it just to get a free ride. On the
way, Ferdinand had died at the Phillipines at the Battle of
Mactan. We watched in horror as a spear had been thrusted through
his heart. We saw the murderer and tried to fart at him all three
of us, but he was too far away and ended up putting our whole
crew in a coma.
We sailed to the mainland and found a stowaway in our ship. He
was a bald, skinny guy and said his name was Glenn Paul III. We
didn't trust him until he said he farted on the people that
killed Ferdinand and had a torch up to his butt and burnt them.
The reason why he did this was to avenge his pet rock, the
architects used his pet rock to make a house. He had rebelled
against his country and became an anti-hero. When we saw his
disloyalty to general people, it made us want him for our team of
outlaws. We welcomed him to our crew and of four and used our
ship to shoot cannons at everyone having a spear. We sailed off
to the unknown seas for whatever the universe has to offer us.
The Maya Empire's Doom
We sailed all the way back to Mesoamerica and found a tribe
called the Mayas. We saw that they worshipped corn- we all hated
corn, so we didn't like them. We saw that they did sacrifices and
they considered us as sacrifices to the gods. We were in line of
being sacrificed, but Toan and Andy didn't care because they were
immortal. We noticed that Glenn had disappeared, we looked around
and saw Glenn being sacrificed. Francisco had cut the blade that
was going to cut Glenn in half, and he cut the priest in half
also. Francisco had stayed for the Mayas worshipped his Jaguar
heart. We jumped off the pyramid and ran to the forest. Toan had
found a stake which seemed different. His backpack and stakes
suddenly burst on fire and he had found the power to set things
on fire. He then set the whole Mayan race to flames.
The Battle of Claws and Stakes
Toan found power and realized Francisco was getting corrupted.
Toan knew what he had to do and burned everything and we mean it
when we said everything. He had set their houses, crops, temples,
and even water which vaporized into thin air. Francisco got
enraged and there was a great battle between Toan, "The Stake",
and Francisco, "The Jaguar". Andy felt this weird sensation of
energy, suddenly his spork had turn into a very sharp spork that
cutted things perfectly, and it had contracted to his wrist.
Flashback: Andy thought that that mysterious man in the white
cart was suspicious, the crazy man who liked to sell "magical'
sporks. He could've been a wizard.
Glenn had found a rock that could take the place of his previous
rock. He felt something weird about his trusty, old spear. It had
become incredibly sharp and when he threw it, it always warped
the air, turning, and came back upon the grasp of his hand. The
battle between Toan and Francisco was still going on. Toan and
Francisco were bleeding on each hand and sharp gashes had came
upon their ribs. Only Andy and Glenn were able to stop this
battle between claws and stakes, Andy tied his spork around
Glenn's spear, and threw at them knocking them both out, they
didn't even remember a thing.
The Final Battle
We went to Japan and heard rumors about the Legendary Shogun
Jayden Nagata. He had overthrown all who had opposed his rule. He
had made the whole island of Japan a sad, dark place filled with
poverty and famine. Glenn had decided for us we had to slay the
mighty tyrant. They said that his favorite place was the Sushi
bar on the mountains. It was called "Fish on Rice" and was filled
with his personal guards. We decided to hitch-hike there on a
horse-drawn carriage, to sneak past the guards. It turned out to
be a trap and they lead us to a prison. They had heard us slaying
down the Byzantine and was prepared to handle us. We were prison
mates with an overweight man named Aaron. He proved his loyalty
when Toan dropped the soap Aaron didn't do anything.
Unfortunately, they took all our weapons except for Andy's
retractable spork. The bars were pretty much unbreakable and
Francisco couldn't slash through them no matter how angry he
got.They thought it was just a permanent accessory and let him
by. Andy gave Toan his spork and Toan lit it on fire. Andy used
it to melt through the bars and we got our weapons back.
Francisco went to start a prison riot to distract the guards; we
were able to get away from all the chaos. Aaron had found a bone
on the ground and picked it up to wielded it as a deadly weapon.
We ran into an abandoned cabin in the woods. We then started
planning the most bold plan we ever had.
We kidnapped some samurai and stole their armor. Once Toan put on
the armor his stakes turned strangely longer and had a hotter,
blue flame. Once Andy had put on the armor his spork turned
longer and began to turn searing hot, sparking with a certain
rage or fear. Francisco had no particular abnormality; he just
had his claws painted jet black. Glenn's spear turned sharper and
the distance was doubled. Aaron couldn't put his on, so we just
gave him a helmet and his bone became harder and heavier. We were
now ready to take Jayden on.
We marched up onto the sushi bar to destroy the Tyrant. We went
through all the bodyguard, and we finally made it to the room he
was in. Toan blew up the door with his blue, flaming stakes.
Jayden was less rice-eyed than we thought. The battle had started
and he had a long katana made of a silver blade and a handle of
carbon fiber. Andy tried to swipe at him, but he was too fast.
Francisco tried cut him but Jayden had gotten under him and sent
him flying. Glenn had thrown his signature spinning spear (which
should have been impossible to catch), but Jayden caught it and
broke it in half. Glenn had nearly burst into tears when he saw
Aaron tried to whack him with his bone, but Jayden slid his leg
tripping Aaron. We were on the floor clearly outmatched. Then, we
all combined our weapons to make something weird, it was a
burning long bone with sharp spikes and a one big blade on top.
Since Glenn was the only one that knew how to throw well he threw
at Jayden and blew up the whole sushi bar. It appeared to be his
katana where he had vaporized. Andy and Toan wielded the sword
and they had became master swordsmen. It gave the mortals
immortality and the immortal strength like no other.
Such a blade should never be in the wrong hands. We decided to
split it into five: two parts of the blade, the cross-guard, the
hilt, and the sheath.Andy and Toan got the two blades. Glenn
protected the cross-guard. Aaron had the hilt, and Francisco got
the sheath. We decided it would be best to keep all the pieces
separate. Andy had become a dragon slayer and a mercenary for
hire. Toan went to be a treasure hunter and explored the Eight
Frontiers in search for artifacts of the past. Glenn went to be a
ninja assassin and killed all the criminals he ever came across.
Francisco had went to the jungle to live in the wild with his
distant cousins. Aaron had set out to lose weight, and to find
some gym equipment.
The Adventures of The Four
Asians and a Mexiguar 2: The Immortales