“Nothing is harder than starting all over again from scratch. Which is why one should never stop preparing for such a possibility. ”
Brilliant green eyes snapped open.
It was dark, very dark. He couldn't even see the clock whose 'tick-tack' sounds filled the room he woke up in the numbers, faintly glowing in the dark, just a blur to his eyes. Groggily, he made to raise up from the comfortable bed he was laying on. Only to promptly fall back on it as the world started to spin around him. He swore.
He didn't know how much time he stood there, with an arm over his face, waiting for the world to stop moving around him as the sound of his harsh pants resonated in his ears. But he did know that, when he opened his eyes anew, the earth stopped its spinning motion and his vision was much better. Now he could even read the time – two thirty seven- shown by the electric clock.
He rolled to his feet, wincing as the bed creaked a little. Warily, he waited for a wave of dizziness to hit him and, when no such thing happened, a soft, relieved sigh escaped his lips. Blearily, he felt his way through the darkness towards the bathroom more than a little surprised to see that he remembered so well the outline of the room.
He flinched, his eyes narrowing at the sudden light that flood the bathroom once he flicked on the switch. After splashing some cold water on his face he finally did what he wanted to do when he started heading to the bathroom. He glanced in the mirror.
He didn't know what he'd been expecting, hoping for – maybe for some of the bulk and height he'd finally gained, but the image of the scrawny boy reflected in the glassy surface made him groan in distress. He forgot how, well, weak he had been at the age of twelve. He threw a dirty look towards his reflection only to have it returned. It didn't really had the counted effect. The stupidly childish face ruined it - big time. It made him seem like a petulant prepubescent kid more than anything else which, technically, he was but that wasn't the point!
He was too short, he was too thin and his brown hair was way too messy! How the bloody hell was he supposed to save anyone like this? Small, gangly, awkward… He actually forgot -or tried to anyway- how pathetic he was before master Shun took him under his wing and trained him. He sighed. There was no point in whining about it – he had to make do with what he had.
He stared again at his reflection. Dressed in bear patterned blue pajamas with water dripping from the end of his nose and brown hair flying everywhere he seemed so fragile, so childish, so , so...young. It was then that, finally, the fact that this wasn't a dream, that it was real and that it had actually worked hit him . Hard. A sound, a cross between a chocked sob and a hysteric laugh, escaped him as he stumbled backwards hitting the wall only to slide off it to the floor, eyes still fixed on the emotional mess shown by his reflection.
For the sake of all sacred they actually succeeded, he dazedly realized. They sacrificed their life, no, their existence in the world to send him here and it wasn't in vain and they were all stupid, so, so stupid for doing it anyway and he couldn't believe that this was for real and, God, they were gone!
Tears started to fall from his eyes but he didn't even attempt to stop them. He just stood there and sobbed and mourned for all the friends, companions and allies that he lost, purging all the pain and bitterness that piled inside him along the years. He didn't know how much time he just stood there, all pathetic like, sniffling and weeping and making a total mess of himself but when he raised his eyes again to meet the ones of his reflection everything changed.
He was still scrawny and weak and a child in all aspects but now there was a fire burning inside him. A fire strong enough to be reflected in his still moist eyes, which were narrowed in determination, making the emerald orbs seem more piercing than ever. The eery glow that his eyes seemed to give off changed his entire presence completely and, just for a second, he thought he saw reflected there a shadow of his former self. His twenty one years old former self.
He raised himself up from the floor and wiped the tear stains off his face with one of his pajamas sleeves. He took a deep, shuddering breath and exhaled slowly before heading back to his bedroom without any last glance to his reflection. The time for freaking out was over. He had a mission now and, considering how much depended on its success, he couldn't waste the time he got feeling sorry for himself. There was hope now and damned he be if he didn't make that hope reality. After all he didn't allow himself to be sent back in time in his twelve years of body for nothing. He would change the future, try to stop the war or at the very least try to make it so that their side got the upper hand. He grimaced.
Too bad he got to go through puberty all over again while doing it.