Author's note- hi. the contest ended but i like the story so njoy. im gonna make a part two.
Just to let you know i spent longer thinking and looking for a name than i have for any of my other pieces of work. I wanted something unique and exotic but beautiful at the same time. I needed a reason for her self harm something that would bring a tear to the eye if one reads it. I found this exciting to come up with. Abit like a challenge. It was fun and i hope you enjoy it
My name is Shakina. It's African for 'Beautiful one'. I think it's a lovely name. It would be even better if i looked lovely too. I'mthirteen years old.See my parents wanted something unique. Something exotic and beautiful.
My little sister's name is Felicite. It's a french unisex name for the word 'happy' or 'lucky'. My parents named her lucky because she was. My mum was pregnant on twins. Something was wrong and they had to kill one in order for one to live. So making a hard decision they randomly picked one of the babies. When my mum was in labour she was told she was early. The baby was premature. Felicite had luekamia and nearly died. Then she had bronchitis. Thankfully she's ok now. Felicite is six years old.
Lastly we have my baby brother Luciano. His name means 'light' My mum picked it for two reasons. The first was because she read a book called 'City of masks' and it sounded cool. The second reason was because mum and dad were depressed because they hadfive miscarriages after Felicite. They thought they couldn't have any more children. But then mum found out she was pregnant. So he was the 'light' to our darkness. I think all the names were cool, quirky and confident. Thay suited my siblings but not me.
Your probably wondering wow you've got a nice family. Well yeh they are. But it wasn't that. My family were perfect. Theirs nothing i would change about them. I- it- It's me. It's hard to tell people. My psychiatrist told me to write in down in a diary. The feelings. What i've been through. How i felt then. How i feel now.
I looked at the appointment list. Next to see me was a Shy girl called Shakina. The only thing her parents knew was that she was raped. Shakina always kept to herself and blushed when she was talking. She hid behind her long black hair and whisper most of the time.I was surprised when i met her. Usually pretty girls like her showed off. But obviously she was traumatized.She would wait till i asked a question and try to answer with less words as possible. She walked in and i told her parents to wait outside.
I sat down and played with my fingers. The psychiatrist looked at me and smiled. 'I'm going to ask some questions and please feel free to say pass if you feel uncomfortable or rather tell me another day. '
'How old were you when you were raped?'
'where were you going?'
'why were you going?'
'where you raped in public?'
'in. A -d-dar-dark p-place'I whispered.If only Luciano's light filled my darkness.I felt my self going pale. The memory came back. I was walking. Then grabbed. I felt terrified. So i tried to scream. I knew what was happing. I wan't stupid. I froze. What if he had a gun? i let him rip my clothes off. I didn't struggle. The cold air was biting me. Suddenly pained filled my womanhood. I screamed but he slapped me and told me to shush. He thrusted harder and harder. I was sore. Finally he let go and i was filled with his liquid. He moved away. I lay for afew moments. Tidied myself up and continued towards the shopping mall.
I opened my eyes. I could see mum, dad and the psyciatrist kneeling beside me. They were blurred. I closed my eyes.
I was going back to the psychiatrist. We were told my normal one wasn't here so i had another one. I went into the room alone. A man was sitting at the desk. He smiled and gestured his handtelling meto take a seat. He asked afew questions. But the whole time he was looking at me. I hid behind my hair.
Substitute Psyciatrist's POV
I looked at the girl before me. She had Black hair. Pale skin. Black eyes. They were empty. She was pretty. She looked kinda gothy. But still nice. I stopped asking questions and looked at her breasts. Wondering what size they were. B? BB? I didn't care. I looked at the walls. I smiled. They were soundproof. I stood up and grabbed her. She stared at me. I ripped off my clothes and locked the door. I grinned.
This new psyciatrist was a substitute. He told me to call him Eric. He stopped asking questions and stared at me. I hid behind my hair. I looked up. HIs clothes were off and he was locking the door. My heart skipped a beat. I know what he was going to do. He pulled my off the chair and put me on the examining table. I was lying onmy back. I closed my eyes wishing it was a dream. It was not. I opened them. He had my clothes off and i felt chilled. He opened my legs wide and started licking my clit. I gasped. And tried to close my legs. He kept them open with his strong hand. My body felt good. I arched my back. I pulled his hair my body betraying me, i pulled him in further. He stopped and something rushed out me. Cum. My firstsquirt. He teased his dick over my vagina then pushed it in unexpectantly. I gasped. I knew his cock was big. He thrusted. SO hard. Each thrust slowed down and i felt something inside me. Cum. He started again. Until we both exploded.
I woke up. I. was in my bed? Mum came in and smiled. 'darling the psychiatrist said your improving.' i nodded. I got up and pulled on my black joggings and a t-shirt. I slept most of the day because my vagina was sore.
The next day was school. I didn't fit in but mum and dad didn't know. See i was like a punk goth. Because i liked them colours. I got bullied. I had my red streaks in and my black jeans fitted perfectly. I straightened my hair down. Just in case i needed to hide my face. I also packed my mirror, pads and Piece of glass i used.
At lunch a guy in black came over to me. He smiled. 'i'm Drake.' I smiled. 'Shakina' i whispered. He sat down and i felt abit better. Drake had pale skin, brown hair and a very hot face.
Over the weeks Drake and i became good friends then he was my boyfriend AND my best friend.He used to do self harm. But he stopped. I didn't.
at lunch i went into the toilets to reapply my mascara and eyeliner. I put a flick at the end of each eye. Courtney and her bitches came in. They barged me out the way but when i tried to come back to the mirror she slapped me. I went into the toilets and checked my make-up. It was fine. I pulled out the jagged piece of glass and looked to see if anyone was peeking over the door. I took a deep breathe and cut along my wrists three times. I dapped it with a tissue and slid some funky bands over them. I walked out the bathroom and sat at my next class. Everybody stared. I sat beside Drake. Unlike me Drake was popluar. He looked cool when he wore all black. I took out my dog collar and tied it around my neck. Somebody chucked a screwed up ball at me. I sighed and opened.
You an emo dog now?
Get ready for after school bitch. I'm gonna fukin beat you up.
Jason your master