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brucek



Booksie Address: http://www.booksie.com/brucek
Country: United States
Favorite book: the hobbit
Member Since: Mar 20, 2011

Featured Writing

The Saddest Damn Clown

Poem by brucek
Posted: Mar 12, 2014
this is who i was and who i am. it's not always pretty.
Tags:sad, clown

a friend if you need one

by brucek
Posted: Dec 13, 2011
this is for all young people on booksie who need someone...
Tags:abuse, parents, bullying, survived, talk to someone

Writing Portfolio

The Saddest Damn Clown

Poem by brucek
Posted: Mar 12, 2014
this is who i was and who i am. it's not always pretty.

Excuse Me? What Did You Say?

by brucek
Posted: Mar 6, 2014
A traffic cop has "one of those nights."

The Weenie Fairy

by brucek
Posted: Mar 2, 2014
a naughty story about the weenie fairy. not intended for...

Take Xanicol!

by brucek
Posted: Feb 27, 2014
Xanicol, the wonder drug of my imagination, is available...

One Step Further Down The Road

Poem by brucek
Posted: Feb 15, 2014
you know who you are.

Meow

Script by brucek
Posted: Feb 11, 2014
good owners understand their pets, and some have...

Run, Little Children, Run

Poem by brucek
Posted: Feb 11, 2014
just a thought: run towards all the wonderful things in...

A Drawer Of Humorous Shorts

by brucek
Posted: Jan 22, 2014
Just some silly sketches from my notebook. They're...

Clu Les Wunn Complains About Super Heroes

by brucek
Posted: Jan 7, 2014
Clu is in rare form.

Too Sick, Too Tired, Too Much Pain

Poem by brucek
Posted: Dec 24, 2013
my brother-in-law took his life during the holidays back...

here comes santa claus (brucek style) (now with ear blasting audio!!!!!)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Dec 23, 2013
this is a blast from the past for all of you old booksie...

what I wouldn't do for thirteen million

Script by brucek
Posted: Dec 5, 2013
how can a man get his hands on thirteen million dollars?...

hounds of stellar howling

Poem by brucek
Posted: Nov 24, 2013
a vision of the astral depths.

The Meeting of the Vegetable Bosses

by brucek
Posted: Nov 23, 2013
something must be done about the tomato problem.

A road I'm flying down

Poem by brucek
Posted: Nov 17, 2013
a mood poem about my insane life.

Bob and Sue write letters

by brucek
Posted: Nov 15, 2013
Bob and Sue are dead, but they still keep in touch.

Ten-Year-Old Clu Les Wunn Thinks About His Things

by brucek
Posted: Oct 5, 2013
clu was quite a thinker back in his early years.

Clu Les Wunn Tries to Understand "Understand". Understand?

by brucek
Posted: Sep 28, 2013
Clu is getting me confused now.

doughnuts in space (revised) chapter three

Short Story by brucek
Posted: Sep 18, 2013
the last chapter I wrote of this story. sorry, not great...

doughnuts in space (revised) chapter two

Short Story by brucek
Posted: Sep 18, 2013
the second of three chapters of doughnuts in space.

doughnuts in space (revised) chapter one

Short Story by brucek
Posted: Sep 17, 2013
I've rewritten doughnuts in space! Come tell me what you...

who's talking, anyway?

by brucek
Posted: Sep 4, 2013
an author has a few problems.

bathroom party

by brucek
Posted: Sep 3, 2013
the sad story of a party in a bathroom.

Clu Les Wunn Makes a Decision

by brucek
Posted: Aug 25, 2013
Good ol' Clu decides not to die.

i guess i'm White

by brucek
Posted: Aug 20, 2013
some thoughts after watching a comedy routine.

personality of man

Essay by brucek
Posted: Aug 18, 2013
I fear man has a personality trait that may lead to his...

neanderthal meets alien

by brucek
Posted: Jul 25, 2013
an alien sends a message through time to Gog, a Neanderthal.

i've lowered my standards

by brucek
Posted: Jul 16, 2013
i'm on a low budget folks. my standards are sinking!...

a sun splashed rosy morning

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 11, 2013
a lovely walk on a beautiful morning.

a conversation with George Carlin

by brucek
Posted: Jul 6, 2013
this is for Spring Sun's challenge!

my theory

by brucek
Posted: Jul 1, 2013
mr. know-it-all strikes again!

driving tips (or, don't do that, you idiot!)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 23, 2013
my own list of the do's and don'ts of driving. so listen...

some short silly stuff for you and all your friends (assuming you have any)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 15, 2013
just some silly stuff. not gonna change the world or...

the delights of being a day care worker

by brucek
Posted: May 26, 2013
missie the day care worker has a few problems. well,...

Clu Les Wunn reminisces

by brucek
Posted: May 21, 2013
Clu remembers the good ol' days.

Clu Les Wunn writes a letter

by brucek
Posted: May 21, 2013
WARNING!! WARNING!! WARNING!! The following piece is...

my dinosaur is missing!

Script by brucek
Posted: May 4, 2013
a woman's dinosaur is missing, and seeks the help of the...

sunshine moonbeam

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 30, 2013
the beginning of each line of the first poem spells...

in response to Iskah's essay

Essay by brucek
Posted: Apr 27, 2013
Iskah E. Shirah of booksie wrote an essay on civil...

satellites in silent space

by brucek
Posted: Apr 23, 2013
satellites find each other in the vastness of space.

my one and only, my one and only love

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 21, 2013
just another poem from my poet mind.

my perplexing anatomy

by brucek
Posted: Apr 15, 2013
oh mr. carlin, i sure do miss you. this one's for you...

let us stand on our own naked feet

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 9, 2013
insecure and afraid, a friendship blooms.

a conversation with teri

Script by brucek
Posted: Apr 4, 2013
an IMAGINED conversation with Teri Cross Chetwood where...

twisting syllables

Poem by brucek
Posted: Mar 30, 2013
from syllables to monumental epics. the wonder of words.

what's in a name, anyway?

by brucek
Posted: Mar 27, 2013
the Hungers name their baby. sort of.

out laughing in the sun

Poem by brucek
Posted: Mar 22, 2013
i have pictures of my daughters on my dresser from when...

The Invasion of the Pony Tails Strippers! Part 4: Abandon Ship!

Script by brucek
Posted: Jan 20, 2013
Brucek panics and can only think of one way of getting...

Invasion of the Pony Tails Strippers! Part Two: The Goodman Blimp

Script by brucek
Posted: Jan 19, 2013
Teri's characters suddenly disappear, along with nearly...

built of contradictions

by brucek
Posted: Nov 19, 2012
this is who i am. maybe.

brucek's personality survey

by brucek
Posted: Sep 24, 2012
WHICH DO YOU LIKE BETTER? I've seen a survey like this...

the third part of "donuts in space"! yep, that's what i said.

Short Story by brucek
Posted: Jul 2, 2012
my goodness, didn't you read the title?

donuts in space (part 2) or the next part, or the sequel, or.....oh hell.......just go read it!

Short Story by brucek
Posted: Jun 13, 2012
back by popular demand (or because i couldn't think of...

donuts in space

Short Story by brucek
Posted: May 29, 2012
remembering Douglas Adams.

the view from my porch

by brucek
Posted: May 13, 2012
we live in a beautiful part of decorah, ia. this is what...

the return of sign and line

Script by brucek
Posted: Feb 14, 2012
sign and line return and have new adventures.

how i tried to write a poem

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jan 9, 2012
attention all poets! i thought i'd share my process of...

the day john lennon died

Short Story by brucek
Posted: Dec 21, 2011
my reaction to john lennon's death.

a friend if you need one

by brucek
Posted: Dec 13, 2011
this is for all young people on booksie who need someone...

a ghost's song

Poem by brucek
Posted: Nov 11, 2011
this poem was written by my 13 yr old daughter, Jane....

how to write humor (an interview with Mike Stevens)

by brucek
Posted: Nov 8, 2011
for all of you who always wanted to be funny, here it is,...

comments on quotes

by brucek
Posted: Oct 31, 2011
we always seem to have an interesting book in the...

my opinion of the ripper murders

Essay by brucek
Posted: Oct 28, 2011
WARNING!!!!! GRAPHIC DESCRIPTIONS!!!!!

scientific speculations part IV: the universe

Essay by brucek
Posted: Oct 13, 2011
a speculation on what type of universe we are living in.

scientific speculations part III: the milky way

Essay by brucek
Posted: Oct 11, 2011
our species, and how it relates to our location in the...

scientific speculations part II: our solar system

Essay by brucek
Posted: Oct 8, 2011
second in a four part series of short speculative essays.

scientific speculations part I: the planet earth

Essay by brucek
Posted: Oct 7, 2011
speculations on the relationship of science and life on...

our dog

by brucek
Posted: Sep 6, 2011
this is about our big black dog, missie. (what a good...

the tale of the missing dragon

Short Story by brucek
Posted: Aug 30, 2011
a dragon trainer loses one of his dragons and sets off to...

the end at the end of the road

Script by brucek
Posted: Aug 9, 2011
the ending of a series of humor skits written by brucek...

rose at the side of the road

Script by brucek
Posted: Aug 3, 2011
kecurb is stuck in brucek's skit and is trying to find a...

your walls protect you (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 20, 2011
the walls that she had to build in order to survive when...

i bless every day (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 20, 2011
i treasured every minute that i could be with her.

i am a fool (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 20, 2011
for a while i got my priorities confused.

short poems (round 4) (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 20, 2011
the last of the short poems. enjoy!

a curve in the road ahead

Script by brucek
Posted: Jul 20, 2011
a little humor skit about the hopes and dreams of a...

short people pitfalls (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jul 15, 2011
life can be tough when you're short. believe me, i...

optimist or pessimist or just plain annoying?

by brucek
Posted: Jul 15, 2011
a dialogue where one person ends up irritating another....

when the paranoid meets Braille (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jul 15, 2011
well, seems as though i got this backwards cause the...

that smile on your face (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 15, 2011
when i fall i really fall. and then i go on and on about...

short poems #3 (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 14, 2011
more short poems for your enjoyment. think of them as...

revenge so sweet (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 14, 2011
i used to be part a poetry writers group. at the end of...

what am i supposed to do? (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 14, 2011
back when i was still trying to work out what kind of...

oh very young

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jul 8, 2011
I wanted so badly to write a poem for all of my young...

dirty gravel and broken glass (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jul 8, 2011
mary and john are a loving couple from the suburbs. or...

the demise of the rainbow (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jul 8, 2011
something is wrong with the ship. what can he do?

unique product combinations

by brucek
Posted: Jul 8, 2011
some companies make the weirdest stuff. it couldn't get...

the cliffs of doom (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jun 30, 2011
it seems to have a kind of jungle theme, but other than...

mama come on back to me

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jun 30, 2011
with all the things that happened to her in her life i...

ever lovin' life (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jun 30, 2011
i was part of a poetry writers group and one of the...

public speaking visualizations (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 24, 2011
what you need to do to relax so you can speak in front of...

ain't words great!? (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 24, 2011
sometimes i like to look through the dictionary. one...

exchanging genetic material (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 24, 2011
an imaginary game i imagined being played on imaginary...

they say they found our cat! (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 24, 2011
a bit of silly dialogue inspired by some monty python...

rushed (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 24, 2011
rush, rush, rush. rush rush.

brucek's verse writing challenge

by brucek
Posted: Jun 23, 2011
I've had an idea for a challenge. Sorry, there are...

two more short poems (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jun 18, 2011
two short poems that i think go well together.

excerpt from a lecture on squareness (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 18, 2011
square defined lecture

what is it all about, really? (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 18, 2011
a not too deep look at the answeres to the questions....

john smith hitormiss memorial hospital (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 2, 2011
the alarming things overheard in the plastic surgery ward

i came, i saw, i conquered? (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Jun 2, 2011
my version of the famous quotation, "I came, I saw,...

johnny clean (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Jun 2, 2011
the majority of child molestation crimes are crimes of...

small stokes fell great oaks (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: May 27, 2011
hoped to clarify this phrase for all that are curious.

humorous sweepings (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: May 27, 2011
sweeping up the little stuff from my humor notebook....

my mother died ten years ago

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 25, 2011
my mother died ten years ago of strep pnumonia. i never...

some short poems (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 24, 2011
some very short poems that i always hoped that i could...

a bird of spring (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 24, 2011
just looking out the window on a spring day at my parents...

mary had a little lamb (with footnotes) (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: May 14, 2011
look at the title guys!

multiple choice (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: May 14, 2011
a multiple choice to decide the best way to end some...

miscellaneous letters (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: May 14, 2011
random wacky letters. (i love writing letters)

beautiful feet (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: May 14, 2011
what an English couple might say to one another in the...

I See Something Wonderful (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 11, 2011
my love often hid herself from me even when i knew she...

i love every part of you (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 11, 2011
i wanted to let her know that i loved her for many more...

when i start upon a dream (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 11, 2011
a poem inspired by my wife once when she was asleep next...

sweet, sweet sugar (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 11, 2011
sometimes your sweety is still there for you even when...

A Golfer's Story--The Unusual Hazard of Orange Golf Balls (old notebooks) alls

Article by brucek
Posted: May 7, 2011
i occationally write sports articles for a newspaper...

new dos equis commercial

by brucek
Posted: May 7, 2011
here is my own version of the dos equis commercial "he is...

unpleasant discovery (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: May 3, 2011
a flight of fancy. our heros have made an unpleasant...

more of the same again (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 3, 2011
that dreaded loneliness, again. (yes, another short...

i must go (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 3, 2011
we broke up and she cared enough to encourage me to find...

fall down in the darkness (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: May 3, 2011
my girlfriend's life was getting better while mine was...

the snob salesman (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Apr 28, 2011
this is for all those salesmen that talk down to you...

a short, short play (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Apr 28, 2011
a short play with a bunch of "Joes"

imagined last words (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Apr 27, 2011
read the title guys!

haikus for yous (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 26, 2011
a few haikus for your viewing pleasure.

Ode to a Cloud (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 25, 2011
a bit corny but i liked some of the images very much.

The Drop (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 25, 2011
Ah! we start out as such rebelious individuals and so...

Precious Point in Time (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 25, 2011
i've always thought that any given moment can be...

The Jury (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 25, 2011
what is a jury when you are the one accused? what if you...

Goes by crawling (old notebooks)

Poem by brucek
Posted: Apr 4, 2011
i was unforntunately bullied a great deal when i was a...

halloween list (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Mar 29, 2011
how i might respond if someone asked me what i was going...

bank confrontation

by brucek
Posted: Mar 29, 2011
what if one day your bank refused to give you your money?...

visit to a bank (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Mar 29, 2011
what would happen on day if your bank to give you your...

three family lymerics (old notebooks)

by brucek
Posted: Mar 29, 2011
here's three poems honoring each of my very wierd...



just click on the book below for a preview!!

NOW PRICED ON AMAZON AT $11.66!


 

 

       A diverse and surprising collection of poetry and humor that ranges from the soft and subtle to the goofy and bizarre.  You'll find talking road signs and conversing planets, wandering words and dancing deliriums.  There are nursery rhymes with footnotes and lullabies with alphabets, sunny winds and wicked grins, all peeking from the rhythm of the poetry.  You'll find out how to spot a fashion model, and the real reason the chicken crossed the road.  And, of course, love is tripped, pondered, and suffered over, in poem after poem after poem.  A celebration of words, emotions, beauty, sorrow, and love, all swirled together like wisps of colored drifting smoke.                                                                                                                                                                

                                                                                                                                  just received my copy of the first issue of "the alarmist"!  i'm on page 32, and if anyone likes really cool looking magazines with cutting edge, really strange and off the wall humor, then go buy yourself a copy at www.alarmistmagazine.co.uk and enjoy.  it's worth the money!                                                      ----------------------------------------------------                                                                                                                               Brucek's first ever published piece, if anyone should care to read it, is at http://www.derekhaines.ch/vandal/2012/02/short-story-the-lizard-and-the-golden-fish-by-bruce-kilarski/      leave a comment!  thanks!   why can't i stop writing!  what's with all these "!!!!!!"?  will someone please unplug the computer!?  help!  finally!  it's endi.............                                                   --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           A recent round of genetic testing have proven conclusively  that Brucek is indeed human.  This substantiates  what has been suspected for years, due to a number of hotly debated observations and clues; his upright bipedal   gate, his use of opposable thumbs, and his clever handling of tools.  The latter has been especially intriguing, as it suggests, at the very least, a faint degree of intelligence.

         A team of scientists and local law enforcement expanded their search to include Sonny and Sam's Landfill, where he was found in relatively good condition, subsisting on a diet of stale pop tarts and bannana peals.  "Once I got used to the stink," said Officer Stan Stanly, "he wasn't so bad to be around.  Except for all of the mumbling."  

         The fire department was assigned the task of bathing him, and it took all afternoon to wrestle him into some clothes, as he has become quite unaccustomed to wearing any.  He now looks every bit as normal as any other citizen in his home town of Decorah, Iowa.

---------------------------------------------------------                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    THE ONLY PEOPLE FOR ME ARE THE MAD ONES, THE ONES WHO ARE MAD TO LIVE, MAD TO TALK, MAD TO BE SAVED, DESIROUS OF EVERYTHING AT THE SAME TIME, THE ONES WHO NEVER YAWN OR SAY A COMMONPLACE THING, BUT BURN, BURN,  BURN LIKE FABULOUS YELLOW ROMAN CANDLES EXPLODING LIKE SPIDERS ACROSS THE STARS AND IN THE MIDDLE YOU SEE THE BLUE CENTERLIGHT POP AND EVERYBODY GOES "AWWW!"

                                                                                                                                                                                                       JACK KEROUAC

LIFE IS FULL OF MISERY, LONELINESS, AND SUFFERING----AND IT'S ALL OVER MUCH TOO SOON.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        WOODY ALLEN

 

AS THE POET SAID, 'ONLY GOD CAN MAKE A TREE', PROBABLY BECAUSE IT'S SO HARD TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET THE BARK ON.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          WOODY ALLEN

 

MOST PEOPLE CONSIDER A GLASS AS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL.  I LOOK AT IT AS TOO BIG.

                                                                                                                                                                                                              GEORGE CARLIN

 

MAY THE FORCES OF EVIL BECOME CONFUSED ON THE WAY TO YOUR HOUSE.

                                                                                                                                                                                                            GEORGE CARLIN

 

CLOTHES MAKE THE MAN.  NAKED PEOPLE HAVE LITTLE OR NO INFLUENCE IN SOCIETY.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                MARK TWAIN

 

IF TOAST ALWAYS LANDS BUTTER-SIDE DOWN, AND CATS ALWAYS LAND ON THEIR FEET, WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU STRAP TOAST ON THE BACK OF A CAT AND DROP IT?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                STEVEN WRIGHT

 

I HAD SOME EYEGLASSES.  I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET WHEN SUDDENLY THE PERSCRIPTION RAN OUT.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                 STEVEN WRIGHT

 

THERE'S A FINE LINE BETWEEN FISHING AND JUST STANDING ON THE SHORE LIKE AN IDIOT.

                                                                                                                                                                                                               STEVEN WRIGHT

 

 

 

I was born in the Chicago suburbs in 1959.  I'm a peacenik and a skeptic and a tree hugger and a athiest, all at the same time.  I'm an ex-member  of mensa.  I didn't get dumber, I just had to quit when the fees got too expensive.  I didn't start writing until I was twenty and away at college.  I started writing poetry, which is always a struggle for me, after I finally realized what an incredible poem Dylan's "Mr. Tambourine Man" was.

 

Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free,

Silhouetted by the sea,

Circled by the circus sands,

With all memory and fate

Driven deep beneath the waves,

Let me forget about today until tomorrow.

 

I was inspired to try my hand at writing humor after watching countless hours of Monty Python reruns back in the '70s.  Thank you John Cleese and Michael Palin.

 

My favorite authors are probably Gene Wolfe (fantasy) and Terry Pratchett (humorous fantasy)

 

My favorite bands/singer-song writers right now are--

Old Crow Medecine Show (blue grass)

North Mississippi All Stars (rock-blues)

Jack Johnson (singer-song writer)

Todd Snider (humorous story teller-folk singer-song writer)

 

My best friend is my son's dog Missie (she loves me unconditionally)

 

 Here's my list of the booksie authors that most blow me away. (in no particular order, of course!)

*Ousma

*Minusthematt

*Lee Edward Neale

*Dannika Summers

*Kchelz

*MissusMooksii

*AemmaBella

*Saigestarx2

*Maij

*MunkicMunkidu

*Aaihalbs

*Juliette Labelle

*Skai

*Thomas Black

*Gideon Elrod

*Jon Mayler

*Moonphish

*Annat2again

*Chris Gerard

*Teri Cross Chetwood

*Scribe Scrawl

of course, there is writing brilliance all over booksie if you look for it.  i've got the cramps in my fingers to prove it!

 

 

 

 

 

 

brucek has 172 Fans

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