Children's Fairy Tales
The Problem With Cinderella
(A Casual Essay)
There's no arguing that Cinderella is probably one of the most loved fairy tales of all time. Actually, I should probably start with "Despite all the logic errors and nonsense that Cinderella is filled with, there's no arguing that it is probably one of the most loved fairy tales of all time." I mean, HONESTLY? There's NO WAY the editor wasn't slacking off. From the spell that only partially breaks at midnight, to the shoe that only fits one foot, and not to mention, the very very late appearance of the fairy godmother, the tale Cinderella is filled with mistakes. So today, I'll edit this story that should have been edited YEARS ago. *insert mock bow* And I'll bring to light the problem -or should I say PROBLEMS -with Cinderella.
If I recall correctly, and I'm 100% sure I'm correct, Cinderella's fairy godmother said (word for word) "On the stroke of twelve, the spell will be broken, and everything will be as it was before." When Cinderella rushed away that night, she accidentally left her shoe. I think you know where I'm getting. The prince still had that glass slipper the next day, which means THE SHOE DIDN'T TURN BACK. The spell only broke halfway. See? I told you the editor was slacking off.
Remember what happens after the ball? The prince takes that glass slipper and puts it on EVERYONE'S foot. Like literally. EVERYONE in the kingdom. I mean, to find every girl in the kingdom and test that slipper in ONE DAY? That's either got to be a REALLY tiny kingdom or the prince just works freakishly fast… Not to mention the fact that the only one in the entire kingdom who could actually fit into the shoe was Cinderella. Like, the stupidity of that just speaks for itself.
Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo. No one's as late as you. Thanks for FINALLY showing up fairy godmother but couldn't you have come earlier? Like WAY earlier? I mean, where WAS that lady when Cinderella was slaving away in her own house?
There you have it. Some of the most obvious errors in Cinderella. But besides that, I can't deny that this is one heck of a story. *rereads essay* We need to fire whoever was in charge of editing this fairy tale. DEFINITELY.
**Note: I LOVE fairy tales, but sometimes I wonder if the editor was sleeping while looking this story over..... (I don't mean to offend anybody or anything. I just figured this'd be fun to write and hopefully fun to read.)