Into the swirling chaos of that early universe
As it took shape , and matter and anti matter vied
For a place , when particles of matter were taking shape
From the billion nuclear explosions taking place
Which together would not even light
A votive candle in the tiniest corner of
Our world , and all it holds
When time and space were ineffable ,
Inseparable and co-dependent
When there was no when ; just after the 'where'
But there was the 'why ' ;
Which was a much more pressing
A question by far;
Than the 'how.'
But no mind was created yet
To agonise about that heavenly conundrum.
In these early days of this New year
Under the frostbitten skies
As clear as a dome of purple hues,
Punctuated with a million pinprick leaks of flickering silver .
I see my own reflected folly and stupidity from the glorious canopy,
Grappling with these same puzzles
And having some more understanding
I can only see more clearly the vastness of the complexity
And can only marvel anew at each newborn creature
Fashioned in the likeness of its progenitor.
And the turning of our planet back again
From out the black winter of its southerly descent
Gives me hope anew and lifts the desolation and bleakness of the soul
Because I was gifted from my mother that bequest
To anticipate , without , hopefully that tendency
Of presumption ;
And with her faith , without that temerity
To assume that I deserve omnipotence
But just the contentment she left with her passing
When she finally passed away at ninety one
On this day .
Six years ago today.
Dear Mother , my dear Mother
Now . Now ! you know.