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Daily Affirmations for Drivers

Article By: Helena Parris
Editorial and opinion



Something for drivers to print out and tape to their bathroom mirrors. Or their dashboards.


Submitted:Nov 17, 2009    Reads: 330    Comments: 15    Likes: 9   


1. Here in the United States, we drive on the right side of the road. If I put down the cell phone and concentrate, I can do it too. I can, I can!
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2. When I am going the wrong way in a lane in the parking lot, I will not glare righteously at drivers trying to wiggle past me. I will wave my apologies and get out of the way.
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3. If sending a text message is so important that I must do it NOW, RIGHT NOW,I will get off the road and find a place to park.
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4. If calling somebody on my cell phone is so important that I must do it NOW, RIGHT NOW, I will get off the road...
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5. On the road are painted white stripes. These stripes are important. I will choose a pair of white stripes and stay between them. I will not drive on the white stripe.
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6. Turning up my music really loud will not make people like it better.
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7. As much my doggie loves me, he does not need to sit in my lap when I am driving. He might complain, but he will get over it. The back seat is where the doggie belongs.
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8. I should not read a book while driving. I can get it on tape or better yet, wait till I get home.
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9. Cutting off a tractor trailer and then braking makes for an embarrassing obituary.
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10. Riding in the back of a pickup truck is an exciting way to travel, especially in the event of a collision.
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11. Weaving madly between cars so I can be first at the next red light gets me mocked by the drivers I cut off to get there. I will stop embarrassing myself like this.
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12. Speed bumps mean "Slow Down." They do not mean, "Whee! Play Airplane!"
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13. Just because I am driving an SUV does not mean I am starring in the movie Mad Max Goes to the Mall.
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14. Leaping the curb to make a U-turn across a grassy median is a good way to destroy my car and make an absolute fool of myself at the same time.
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15. Making obscene gestures at strangers is both uncouth and unwise. They may be armed.
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16. A red arrow means you can't turn until it does. I will not honk and scream at drivers ahead of me who are obeying the law.
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17. There is no point in honking my horn when I am stuck in a traffic jam. The guy ahead of me is stuck too. And so is the guy ahead of him.
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18. I will not drive like a lunatic when my boss's phone number is emblazoned on the back of my vehicle with the question: HOW AM I DRIVING? This could be bad for my career.
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19. For bicyclists: I have a right to use the road, but I am not an ambulance. I will not sail merrily out into an intersection against a red light.
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20. And last but not least: Drinking and Driving Is Illegal. It's stupid. It's just plain wrong. I will not do it! If I am feeling tiddly, I will stay off the road!




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