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Are We the Victims of Ourselves?

Essay By: PeaceLoveLingleton
Editorial and opinion



What kind of impact are the decisions we make everyday having on us?


Submitted:Nov 30, 2011    Reads: 79    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   


We all make decisions every single day: what to wear, where to go, what song to listen to, what TV show to watch, whether or not to do laundry.... this list goes on and on forever. We make so many decisions in the day that we probably don't even realize we are doing it. But, that leads to the question: are we putting enough thought into the decisions that actually matter?

Growing up, we are all told by our parents and over other person older than ourselves how to live our lives. We are constantly given advice. Then when we get to middle school, it seems as if nothing we do is ever right. Our clothes aren't approved of by our mother. We act "innapropriate" and don't really know where we fit in. So, in an effort to fit in, do we make choices for ourselves that we will one day regret?

I recall when I was in middle school, I had some friends that were, to say the least, less than perfect. They were not the kind of people that I would want my children to have as an influence on their lives. And to be honest, they did get me into trouble a time or two. So, I left the group. I was raised in a Christian household, and was always taught to do right, so when I found the group of friends that were all Christians, I fit right in and to this day we are all still close.

But that makes me wonder... what kind of person would I be today if I hadn't chose to change social groups in middle school? My group of friends, who we lovingly call the Super Six, helped me make so many decisions in my life. Anytime I was unsure about something, they were there - and most of the time it was with religious advice. So, today I have really high standards for myself as for what I do and don't do. But, where would I be if I was still with the other group? Their responses to my problems in life wouldn't have been anything like the ones the Super Six gave me... It's something to think about.

If I would have gotten close with the "popular" group in my class early on in life, would my high school experience be different? Would it be better, or worse? It's something to really sit and think about. What if.... What if.... there are so many we can choose from.

But, the same principle applies to the other side of the argument, as well. If I hadn't tried so hard to be "different" than everyone else, what kind of person would I be? Would I be the skinny blonde who acts like I don't know anything other than my own name? Or would I still have the same personality that I have now?

Do other people's choices affect the person we are? One of my close friends right now, was my best friend in elementary school and for the beginning of middle school. But, halfway through, she left me for a more popular group and was extremely cruel to me from that point onward. It wasn't until 10th grade that we became close friends again - and now we are closer than ever! But, if she hadn't chose someone else over me, would I have a different viewpoint? Would I not hate everything about myself? Would I not feel like I will never be good enough for her, or anyone else? Maybe - Who can really know?

The fact is, we are victims. Maybe of other people's opinions and gestures, but mostly of our own. We are holding ourselves back from our full potential and we need to stop! It isn't fair to ourselves, or anyone around us.





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