“What’s… happening” I screamed out my voice was a painful screech gargled by my tears “Please…my baby…my baby…” was all I could manage to say as I felt my back lay gently on the cold steel medical bed in what I am sure was my grandpa Carlisle’s office.
It felt like my stomach was shredding, I could hear the ripping sound within me. My hand never left my stomach and under my palm I could feel my baby moving…moving quickly…too quick for a two month old fetus. I could feel my skin stretching; I could feel my stomach slowly turning into a small lump… that small lump quickly grew into a hard round ball or knot…my once flat stomach was slightly rounded, visibly bigger than it had been just moments prior. This pain it had to stop…I couldn’t breathe…it had to stop…
“Do something” I heard Jacob’s voice boom loudly; panic stricken. I felt his hand on my forehead; I think he was wiping away my sweat. “It’s ok Ness…it’s going to be ok” he said, I think he was talking to himself just as much as he was talking to me.
I’d never been this scared in my entire life, the Volturi, Joham, Serina the half immortals nothing compared to how scared I was feeling right now. Miscarriage was the first thing that popped into my mind. What if my baby was…dying? What had I done wrong? My tears drenched my neck and my shirt as the insufferable pain coursed through every single inch of my body.
The pain of knowing that my child was at risk was much worse than the agonizing, unbearable pain I was experiencing at the moment.
I could here my entire family but I couldn’t make much of it. I felt different cold hands touching my body… Jacob’s hand never left my forehead.
“I need to put an I.V. in please… Jacob … Edward…we have to stop her from shaking…keep her as still as possible” I heard my grandpa Carlisle order.
Stop the shaking…? I didn’t realize it…but I’d been moving uncontrollably; my body trembling with every aching rip and stretch of my stomach.
The pain got to a point that it was so tedious…so horrendous, that I was almost delirious…no…I was delirious; I didn’t know what was happening … it felt as if I was having an outer body experience. I was looking at myself on that bed clutching my slowly growing stomach protectively. I saw the sweat and tear mixture saturating my body. I looked like I was dying. I thought I was dying. At that moment I realized that if I had to die in order for my baby to survive than that’s what was going to have to happen.
Obviously my child was sporadically growing, who knew how big my baby would grow in this short time frame. Who knew how he or she would survive. I needed this child to be healthy and safe, I needed this child to be…alive…even if I couldn’t be.
“Save…save the baby” I managed to pant out exhaustedly. “Please… just… save the…”
Then everything went black.
I was standing in a corner of a room. A bright colorful room…blues and pinks and limes swirled with yellows painted this room and the furniture; it was refreshing.
There was a chair…it was a rocking chair. I could only see the back of it; I saw hair that looked like mine long and curly, flowing over the back of the chair as it rocked back and forth. I slowly walked towards this chair and to this woman.
She was humming a song…it was a beautiful song; I quickly identified what song it was…it was the song my father composed for me so many years ago.
I reached the side of the rocking chair and I was shocked… there I was sitting in that rocking chair. I gasped slightly. I was sitting there peacefully happiness embodied me. I was staring down at something in my arms …I followed my gaze to look down at what I was holding…
I saw a beautiful baby girl in my arms; she had to have been almost a year old. This angel lay in my arms with her eyes gently closed, I could tell she was not fully asleep but she was close to it.
This baby looked unreal…she was that beautiful. Her hair was dark-almost black- and extremely curly…a million little ringlets sprawled all over her head; resting on her shoulders. Her skin light caramel …and soft …her cheeks slightly touched with a hint of pink, I wished I could see her eyes…I wished I could look into the soul of this beautiful being.
I was startled out of my reverie when I heard the door open…and there stood Jacob. His hair very long again, the way I liked it. I so badly wanted to run to him and wrap my arms around his neck but the smile on his face focused on the Renesmee in the rocking chair holding the beautiful baby girl.
I stepped back as a single tear ran down my cheek…it was a tear of happiness not of sadness…for once.
Jacob leaned down and kissed me and I smiled. He then placed a soft kiss on the sleeping angel I was holding.
The baby moved shaking her head back and forth, wiping her eyes and cheeks as if she were annoyed she’d been disturbed…her ringlets flailing about freely…then her eyes opened.
They were my eyes…they were my mother’s eyes; they were deep chocolate brown eyes.
I cried as I stood that corner again; watching my family together. I cried tears of pure joy and bliss. I was watching first hand the fairytale that I’d been waiting for. It was complete.
I was happy…we… were happy.
Chapter 7 Part II
It was a foggy glaze over my eyes as I struggled to open them. I didn’t move one centimeter of my body…something in the back of my mind told me not to move…told me that I should take each second slowly.
I finally managed to force my eyes about half way open, when I felt three sets of hands touch my arms and my face. Two hands were warm along my cheek…Jacob. The other hands were cold…ice cold… as they delicately rubbed and massaged my arms and hands…My parents.
“Jake…what’s…what’s going on…” my voice was barely audible…it was a pained and low scratching sound gargling from my throat.
“Shhh…Ness, just relax…” Jacob said lowly…his voice very much compacted with nerves as he softly massaged the side of my face.
I listened to him and not by choice; I was unable to force my brain to make my body move. I needed something and I didn’t know what. I had a question to ask but I didn’t know what. I was missing something and I didn’t know what…
And as quickly as I forgot; it all came back to me …
“My baby…” my voice cracked. I yanked my arms from my parents hold and instinctively wrapped them around my stomach. I remembered feeling a growing ball or knot before I’d blacked out…I knew that my child was growing under my palm in a matter of seconds…with each tick of a clock my baby grew.
The fear that coursed through me was unidentifiable, I knew that if I clutched my stomach and my stomach was flat…that if I didn’t feel life…if I didn’t hear my baby’s heart beat I would go mad…I would be insane, I wouldn’t want to live anymore…I wouldn’t live anymore.
My shaking frail hands lay still on my stomach as I let out a huge sigh saturated with my uncontrollable cries of relief.
My stomach was nice and rounded…bigger even than what I remembered from when I blacked out. I didn’t know how long I’d been out but I knew that when I did black out I was two months pregnant; my stomach had grown to the size of at least a woman four or five months pregnant.
Now, though I couldn’t be absolutely positive, it felt like I was nearly seven months if not more. I massaged and traced the width and size of my enlarged stomach as I felt slight relief wash over me.
“The baby…is ok…?” I said, my voice still weak but full of underlined elation. I’d already known the answer to this question; I could now focus closely and hear how strong my babies’ heart beat was.
“We will have Carlisle come in and explain everything that happened…but yes…the baby is fine” my father spoke serenely.
Those were the sweetest words I’d ever heard. I could deal with the excruciating pain, and the stretching and tearing of my skin if it meant my child would be ok.
It felt good to lay here, I didn’t feel anything anymore…the pain that was so persistent, the pain that was a crescendo through my body, the pain that I thought would never end was completely gone.
I smiled weakly as I rubbed my stomach in a circular motion.
“Carlisle is on his way up now” Jacob said lowly. He leaned in and kissed my forehead softly…as if he thought I was fragile, like I would break or something.
“How long was I out…?” I asked
“A little over seven hours, sweetheart…” I heard my mother say “Are you feeling any pain?”
I turned towards her slowly and smiled. I was seeing clearer now.
“I feel fine…I’m fine…all that matters is that she is alright” each word I spoke was spoken softly and intricately as I felt like it was hard to speak.
“That… she… is alright…?” Jacob asked confusingly.
“The baby” I stated simply.
He smirked “You’ve been awake less than five minutes and you are already joking” he said as he brushed my hair behind my ear with his hands.
“Jake I’m not joking” I wanted to sit up but I didn’t know how they would react, I had to choose my words carefully.
“I think I’d be more comfortable if I were sitting up” I stated to the room. They paused for a moment…then slowly they had me gripped firmly. I slowly sat up … my body felt completely different. My small frame was distorted; looking extremely disproportioned …the roundness of my stomach causing me to feel beyond weighed down.
I sat with my back on the wall; I hadn’t noticed the tubes in my arms and the machines hooked to my chest and stomach. I couldn’t focus on that though I wanted to tell them about the vivid dream I’d had when I blacked out.
“I know the baby is a girl” I said confidently. They just looked at me Jacob looked surprised and I couldn’t tell why. But I continued.
“I had this dream…but it was more than a dream it was like I was Aunt Alice or something it was like I was looking into the future”
I spoke as my hands never stopped rubbing my rounded stomach.
“I was looking at myself” I turned to my dad “I was humming the song you wrote for me when I was born…and I was holding this beautiful creature…she was…”
I turned to Jacob “Jake, she was so beautiful and she looks like you…and we were so happy everything was fine…it was a fairytale. I know that this baby is a girl…I know that we are going to have a happy ending” of course tears were streaming down my cheeks as Jacob wiped them away with his thumb.
Jacob then turned to my parents and my mother nodded. I was confused.
“Ness…” Jacob said as if he were amazed and confused.
“What…Jake? You said the baby is ok…what’s going on…” my voice was panicked, what if there were something wrong but they didn’t have the heart to tell me yet? They wouldn’t lie to me though…would they?
“No…no…no nothing like that I promise please calm down you have to keep your heart rate leveled for the baby” Jacob interrupted.
As soon as he said those words I started to breathe slowly trying to calm my self…anything I had to do to help my baby in anyway I would.
“Ok…I am calm… what’s going on?” I breathed
Grandpa Carlisle walked into the room at that moment. I immediately disregarded the question I’d asked Jacob and focused on the millions of questions I had for my grandpa. The first one obviously being how did I get from two months pregnant to seven or eight months in the matter of hours.
“Grandpa, what’s going on…is she ok…?” I begged.
He smiled slightly before speaking “Oh, so they told you it’s a girl…yes she is fine”
I paused for a moment not understanding, I looked at Jacob and a smile rimmed across his face.
“That’s what I was going to tell you…he did an ultrasound…it is a girl” he kissed me on the lips softly.
Though in my heart I knew my baby was a girl, it was still different to officially know for sure. As my tears ran past my smile I turned to my grandpa again.
“So…” I sniffled “She…is ok” it wasn’t a question as I breathed steadily trying to keep my heart rate even.
I inhaled “Ok…so why …so what happened why did all of a sudden…”
He walked over to my stomach and adjusted one of the monitors as he typed something in.
“Well Nessie, with the research I have done on you and the fetus I think I know exactly why she started growing so spontaneously” he was talking to me as he focused on the monitor’s screen; reading a bunch of numbers that I didn’t understand.
“I took a blood sample from the fetus…It appears that your baby…your daughter… has the gene in which Jacob has in order to phase”
I was in shock, I’d joked about it but never did I honestly think my child would have this gene. I looked at Jacob then quickly back to my grandpa
“Wait…she can phase…”
“Yes and no” he said as he pulled the tape off of my stomach replacing it with a different color tape. “We are not quite sure. The gene that is used to phase is unstable…it happens sporadically there is no telling when it can occur…especially in a younger werewolves and being mixed with your vampire traits…”
As what he said sunk in I was in complete shock I didn’t hear the rest of what he was saying.
“She phased inside of me…?” I blurted out louder than I expected my voice to be, but I couldn’t believe it, I didn’t understand…well I did understand but it was too amazing too unreal too… true.
“That’s where the yes and no falls into place…we honestly cannot be sure if she phased or not…we had to wait for another machine to give you an ultrasound the one I had wasn’t strong enough to see through the thick material surrounding the baby. By time the machine came you were already at this size and stable…she was completely peaceful, she was sleeping” he finished with a smile.
“I believe this is why out of the blue she started to grow so rapidly” he continued “we think your stress level combined with her oddly matched DNA caused her to…”
“Phase” I said simply
“Possibly…we cannot be sure…nothing is concrete she is literally one of a kind, most things we will have to play by ear…we are still learning as she is growing”
“She is so young…she is a girl…she…I thought you had to reach a certain age before you could phase or even know you could phase…I thought that…” I stuttered trying to take it all in.
“Well, werewolves only tend to phase when there are vampires around…and with Jacob being an Alpha the trait is more prone…she is literally living with the gene of a werewolf mingled with that of a vampire…this is more reason she’d be so susceptible to phasing…and the erratic growth caused by being partly vampire”
I didn’t say anything else as I tried to let reality settle in.
“The pain… the growing…the…stretching…is it going to happen again?” I asked lowly. I truly didn’t know how to react or what answer to expect.
“We think stress is causing her to grow so erratically….just like if Jacob or one of the other werewolves are upset… they phase sometimes beyond their control…we feel this may be happening to her…if you can minimize your stress, you may be able to finish out the last trimester in full…but that is not a guarantee.”
“So if I get stressed…”
“She will probably react to the stress and we may have to deliver her early”
My heart sank, I quickly thought back to all the things that had happened leading to my stress. The dream I’d had about Serina…not knowing what happened to her son-who in my dream was being bitten by Joham- The Volturi most importantly the Volturi, what was going to happen with them and…Nahuel.
My mind back tracked to right before I felt the unbearable pain. Jacob was going to phase because Nahuel was there; I wanted to stop him but I was restrained by Aunt Alice whose eyes were glossed over in thought-obviously a vision. I remember seeing my father rush over to her as he focused on her vision and then the pain began.
What had she seen…what was going on? These questions I had to ignore, they would bring me stress, I would get upset, I needed to stay calm. I breathed in slowly and exhaled slower.
“So…I am guessing no one in this room is going to tell me what Aunt Alice saw…because what ever it was will more than likely send me into labor” it was not a question as I spoke it.
All of there eyes pierced through me. I knew I was right, I knew that what ever it was, was bad, and for once I was not gong to be upset about being kept in the dark…I couldn’t let my self think about anything but my baby. I would keep her safe…from everything.
I’d never seen anything like it, the look on her face…I couldn’t take it. I wanted to make her pain go away but I couldn’t. I had no clue she was pregnant, this pregnancy was causing her this pain.
I watched stunned as her eyes glazed over and rolled to the back of her head. Jacob had her in his arms before any of us-apart from her father- knew what was happening. Her screams were horrid, I knew they rang loud throughout the house; I wouldn’t be surprised if they could have been heard miles away. They were quickly upstairs…the entire family.
I stood there out of place wanting so badly to be by her side but I couldn’t…I didn’t belong there. I didn’t belong in Nessie’s life anymore. I decided I would wait outside. I wouldn’t interfere but I couldn’t leave until I knew she was ok. Hours and hours passed at least seven… as I patiently waited for word.
The door finally opened I turned around and was surprised to see Jacob standing there. Before everything happened with Nessie and the baby he wanted to rip my head off, I saw it in his eyes. But now, he looked much calmer
“I figured you would still be here” Jacob said flatly.
“She’s ok…” I said…it wasn’t a question, I knew that if Nessie wasn’t ok, he wouldn’t be standing here before me like he was.
“Yes she is”
There was an awkward moment of silence, when I realized… that was all I needed to know. That I stayed to make sure she was ok…and she was. I needed to leave…I needed to stop being a burden to Nessie no matter how much I loved her. I was never going to be that person that she wanted…or needed.
My destination now was to go back to the Volturi…I would figure something out…I couldn’t drag the Cullen’s into this like I almost had. They needed to focus on Nessie and her…baby.
“Ok” I nodded “Just tell her I’m happy she…and they baby are ok” I walked down the steps.
“Look” Jacob said abruptly; I turned around “Ness…she…” he stopped; it was as if the words were hard for him to say “you two have this friendship…I don’t like you and I never will like you… but the reason all this happened was because she is stressed…the stress is causing the baby to react negatively”
I looked at him waiting for him to elaborate.
“She cannot deal with all of this… any of this…if she continues to stress out or get worked up about anything and we cant manage to keep her heart rate leveled; it will cause her to go into early labor and we don’t want that. So I am saying to you…I don’t have a problem with you anymore…not in front of her at least”
I was surprised that these words were coming out of Jacob’s mouth.
“Since your going to be around…I’ll deal with it” he finished. I was confused ‘since I was going to be around’…?
I wasn’t going to be around, I knew that I had no place in Nessie’s life that I’d done enough damage…she’d spoke those exact words to me herself. Why would Jacob assume I’d still remain here?
“I don’t know what you’re talking about” I said honestly.
He rolled his eyes as if he were frustrated and ready for this conversation to end
“Alice had a vision about the Volturi coming here within a couple months …we are going to help you fight” he stated.
A couple months …? I was stunned and so appeased that they would still help me after everything.
“Is Hulien…?” I couldn’t finish my sentence.
“Don’t know…I just know they will kill you and Hulien and still try and come for Nessie so we need to be united”
My mind was thinking of too many scenarios but all I did was nod.
“Just one more thing…don’t say anything to Nessie about this…just tell her that we are getting along and that everything is fine…we need her happy and stress free…we can’t risk her going into early labor…or going through that pain again”
“Yes…anything” I obliged. Jacob quickly turned around and was back in the house. I stood there still processing this unexpected conversation.
I breathed in and sat back on the porch…thinking; maybe everything will be ok…maybe.