It was late when he came in.
And he was drunk.
When I got in, I undressed, took a shower then cried my heart out.
Everything had happened so fast.
I had pinned for Emilio, since the day I found out, I had a second chance at life.
I had tried to better myself, and save to go and see him in his country.
But when it came down to it, I ended up meeting him, where I met him, in the dream.
And poor James was again, along for the ride.
He switched one of the lights, on and started banging about.
He didn't even realise I was in bed.
I could hear him taking his shoes off, and throwing them across the room.
He was also swearing.
Fucking bitch I heard him say, amongst other bad things about me, in his strong Scottish accent.
He then came over to the bed.
Then realised I was in it.
He pulled back the covers.
And, grabbed my hair.
Fucking hell it hurt.
Make a fool of me will you he said pulling my hair, nearly of my head, right up to his face.
Not in this life, I thought to myself.
So I punched him right in the face.
He left go of my hair and fell back, away, from the bed.
He fell hard on to the coffee table.
Which, fell to pieces.
Shit, I have killed him, I said shaking my throbbing hand.
I didn't realise I had that much power in me.
I got out of the bed, and went to get my case and put some clothes on.
James never moved.
When I had quickly got dressed, I gathered all my stuff up and shoved it all in my case, ready to make my escape.
But I had to check on him, if I was to just get up and go.
I was shaking now as what if I had really killed him, that was the dream over, full stop.
I could of just ran out of that room.
And hoped he came too and was ok.
But I was not that evil.
I put my case down and slowing went over to him on the floor.
I could see blood.
Shit shit, shit, I said.
I shook him to try and wake him.
He did not respond.
I then called his name.
I checked to see if he was still breathing.
He was but I was worried he would stop.
I ran to the phone in the room.
I called down to the reception to ring for an ambulance
They asked what happened.
God I would have to lie.
I said he came in drunk and tripped, and fell hard on the coffee table.
They said an ambulance was on the way, and a member of staff was on his way up, to our room.
I ran around tidying things and putting James's stuff in piles, in case we would not be coming back to the hotel.
A knock at the door came and I went an answered it.
Hello madam I am a first aider, the man said.
I let him in and took him to where James was laying.
The first aider checked him over, and tried to see where the blood was coming from.
Looks like he has cut his head, and knocked himself out the man said.
It wasn't long before the paramedics turned up.
I just sat on the bed.
What could I do, and what would James say when he came round.
They checked him out, and James, started to come round a bit.
But they wanted to take him to hospital to keep an eye on him as he had a bad knock to his head.
He would also have a black eye before long, as well thanks to me.
I said I would come with them.
The hotel manager, on duty, came into see what had happened.
I told him what happened, and that I would go to hospital, with James.
He said he would get the room cleared up for us, and not to worry about the damages.
I thanked him, then got my handbag and coat and followed the paramedics, out to the ambulance.
In the ambulance, James was still not sure of his surroundings.
The paramedics could not give him many drugs, as they knew he was full of alcohol.
I sat by James but felt terrible.
This was, all my fault.
When we arrived at the hospital, I had to give James's details at the reception.
They asked how he fell.
Again, I lied and said he tripped, as he was drunk.
God I was digging a hole for myself.
Then I was told to wait, while he was treated.
I waited well fell asleep, for about 3 hours.
It was now gone 7 in the morning.
Then a nurse came and woke me and said James was asking for me.
Coming to, I thought oh thank god, then I realised he might not be in a good mood with me.
I got up and followed her to where James had been treated.
I walked in and he was awake, with a bandage around his head, and the start of a black eye.
The nurse left us to it.
We were now alone.
I looked at him, afraid of what he might say or do.
He looked at me with an angry look on his face.
I said nothing.
It was his call.
So he said, did you enjoy yourself, with Emilio then, James said, with a sore head, due to alcohol not the bump.
I did nothing, I said coming over to him.
You got in to his car, James said.
He gave me a lift back to the hotel that's all, I said.
Fair enough, James said, but you had not met him till that moment right, or am I missing something.
Shit I was going to have to come clean.
No I met him earlier, when he came out of the opera house, for the first time ever, just before I turned up at the club, to find you and that woman, almost doing it, I said stating my case.
James was full of rage, but in pain.
I was not almost doing anything with that woman, he said, nearly falling out of the bed.
I ran forward, to stop him falling.
And what, were you doing at the opera house, James said, as I helped him lie back down on the bed.
Ok ,ok, I said, I went to seek Nicole in the day, I found her, I stayed with her, and her parents for a few hours, chatting, then I mentioned I liked opera, and they said they were off to the opera that night did I want to come.
James just looked at me.
I carried on,
I went, and when we came out after he was there signing autographs, I went up to him, I had to James.
James was not really happy about what I was telling him.
He was the understudy, for the tenor, who took ill and had to cancel, I really had no idea he was going to be there, but I needed to go to the opera to just check, I said with all honesty.
Don't tell me it was fate, James said.
It must of been, I replied.
The voice in side of me spoke to him, and told him he would do well, I told James.
That bloody voice inside James said.
Look James how many times have I told you, about this voice, it's not me it's this voice, thing.
Whatever, he said.
I was hurt by his words.
Look Liz, I have had a knock to the head, and I have not lived another life, or do I have a mystery voice instead of me now, James said turning away.
You know my situation James, I said.
Yes I fucking do, he said turning his head away.
Both of us never said a word for a few minutes.
Then I spoke.
James, me and Emilio only spoke, at the opera house and we only spoke in the car going back to the hotel, we have not made plans to meet or anything, I said taking hold of his hand.
James was still not looking at me.
I never told him of the dream, I said to James.
But seeing most of what you saw, or dreamt has come true, it won't be long before you run off with him James said, now taking his hand away and folding his arms.
He had a point.
There was a chair by his bed and I went and sat in it.
I was shattered.
Do you want me to go, I turned to ask James?
James had tears in his eyes.
No I don't Liz, he said as one rolled down his face.
I got back up and went closer to him.
He looked in a bad way, because of me.
They asked me what happened, James said wiping his face.
I said nothing.
I told them I was drunk and tripped over, James said, trying to compose himself.
Thank god, I thought to myself.
I thought I had killed you, I replied.
I got him a tissue out of my hand bag.
I always kept a packet with me.
Passing it to him, he took hold of my hand again.
Liz I am sorry, for pulling your hair, I deserve this he said.
No you don't James, I said, now starting to cry.
We both just stared at each other, me with watery eyes, and him with red ones.
Liz I know you're not sure about us, but I want to be with you so bad, James said reaching to touch my face.
God what do I say.
I had now made contact with Emilio.
My mind was all over the place, and I had much to think about.