My lips touched Shizuo’s ear for a few seconds, lightly blowing on his earlobe. He shivered, and I pulled away from my push-up position, resting my arms for a minute and letting my eyes openly roam his torso suggestively. He raised an eyebrow at me, as if in challenge, and I brought myself completely upright, practically straddling him. He smiled, and I smiled back, wickedly, my fingers tracing their way up the outer sides of his thighs to his hips, and then his shirt. I smiled again, trying to hide my ineptness and gracelessness as I continued, my fingers making their way under his shirt. He smiled at me as I paused, knowing my awkwardness and making fun of me without words. I hid my smirk, and decided to use it to my advantage. I bit my lip, and looked away for a moment, looking back at him, and then away, looking uncertain and childishly innocent. I then slowly traced my fingers up his chest, avoiding his eyes and smiling to myself as he twitched under my fingers.
“Agh, why are your hands so col- ngh” I kissed him, softly, shutting him up and pressing myself onto him gently, not that he’d feel my weight anyway. I moaned quietly, feeling him shiver under me, and as I pulled away, he growled. “Damnit” he frowned, seeming to get it as I slid off him, and he grabbed my arm, pulling me back. I landed haphazardly on his chest, given no time to lose my breath as his lips claimed my own. I melted into the kiss, his lips warm and inviting. He licked my lip, and took advantage as my mouth opened in shock, our tongues fighting for dominance. I pulled away as he broke for air, and put my finger on his lips, smirking.
“No cheating, you had your turn, I had mine” He groaned and slammed a pillow into his face as I jumped backwards to the opposite side of my bed. I giggled as he swore to himself.
“Damnit, you’re going to be the death of me. Nggh. Damnit” I laughed at him, and he slid the pillow off of his face, abandoning it, and looking at me with one eye. I giggled again, and he pushed himself up, eying me with a slight smirk. I backed up, my back hitting the wall, and then panicked.
“What are you doing…?” He was close now, and I felt his hands wrap around my hips, “Shizuo-kun? What-” His lips silenced me, full of power and emotion, his arms holding me hostage, and I found myself weaken at the knees, my eyes closing as his lips massaged mine, pure fire running through my veins. His hands tightened on my hips, his fingers digging into my flesh through my clothes… A flash of memory flew through me. Izaya’s hands moved over my body, his hands eliciting shivers of disgust, his fingers digging into my hips as- I screamed, pushing at the body in front of me with all of my strength. I fell to the ground after the person fell back, my hands on my head, dry sobs escaping my lips as I shook. Memories continued to play through my head, pain and grief blinding me to reality. Tears fell from my eyes as I bit down on my screams. Izaya’s eyes glowed at me, feline… A predator’s eyes, smirking, were approaching me in my memory. A hand landed on my shoulder,
“Get AWAY from me!” I screamed again, pushing the hands away from me and trying to push myself away at the same time. I stumbled over my own feet, reaching for the door-
“Kuri-chan!” I froze in place, shaking. Those were his words… But not his voice… I turned, wide-eyed, and paranoid and came face-to face with someone excluded from my nightmares…
“Shizuo-kun” I whispered, “Shizuo-kun” My voice shook, and I slid down the wall again, shaking violently. I remembered I was safe, I was with Shizuo and Kasuka… How could I protect Kasuka when a simple touch brought back such hallucinations? I wiped at my face, and felt angry at myself for such open weakness. How was I supposed to fight it, or him, if I continued to run, and stumble around like a fledging?! Shizuo’s hand landed on my shoulder, startling me, and making me gaze up at him. His eyes were confused, and I realized the full extent what I’d done.
“What’s wrong, Kuri-chan? Did I hurt you? I’m sorry, what happened?” I wiped away my tears again, his misdirected anger at himself only making me angry.
“Not- you” I tried to breathe properly, only managing ragged breaths. I rubbed my eyes wildly, “its not- you, Shizuo-kun, sorry I- didn’t mean it” I took a deep breath, holding it still in my protesting lungs, and then exhaling it when I got dizzy. I did the same thing again, until I was sure I could breathe properly, and then faced Shizuo, his confusion only increased.
“Is this at all related to the- cuts?” his eyes showed worry, and I tried to think clearly. In a way, it did, but not entirely… I nodded, feeling Shizuo’s warm hand against my face. “Did I hurt them?” I shook my head at him, and his brows furrowed further.
“It wasn’t you, Shizuo-kun, I’ll tell you who- I just- I need time…” my voice shook, and Shizuo nodded, even though I could see his frustration. “I’m sorry, Shizuo-kun, I’m sorry, I keep breaking down” I sniffed, feeling guilty and stupid. I hadn’t cried like this a while since I escaped. Shizuo hushed me, his fingers brushing my cheek softly,
“Its okay, Kuri-chan, I’m here for you, don’t worry about anything, I’ll help you get better” his words soothed some fear inside of me, and I nodded, letting a small smile grace my lips. “That’s better” he grinned, and my smile grew, “I like your smile” he kissed my forehead, and I felt suddenly childish.
“Heeey” I pouted, “I’m not a child” he raised an eyebrow at me, throwing in a playful ‘really’. I pouted further, “You don’t need to coddle me” I poked his chest and he smiled wider,
“But I’m going to now” He picked me up, and I frowned at him. “That’s a good girl” he cooed, laughing as I gave him an indignant expression, he rocked me side to side like a baby.
“Shizuo-kun” I started threateningly, and he looked down at me, still smiling, “I haven’t hurt you yet, but I’m going to in a minute” he must have realized the way I desperately clutched on to his clothes, because he laughed, and leant down to kiss me. A flash of red eyes made me hesitate, but I shook it off, reminding myself Shizuo was here, and enjoying the pleasant feelings while they lasted. He turned around and threw me at my bed, making me squeal as I fell through the air.
“Don’t trust me?” he pouted, making me laugh at the weird expression, and I shook my head,
“I don’t trust gravity, more like it” He smiled before looking out the window, his eyes lighting up.
“How’s your hip?” He pressed the bandage lightly, and I winced,
“It needs a bit more healing” I muttered, feeling like I disappointed him,
“So you want to torture me?” I looked up to Shizuo, beyond confused, before he laughed. “Training, do you want to come out with me? You can train a bit, and then watch?” I smiled, nodding.
“That’d be nice”