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Why, Kenny? Why must you die? 23 Times!

Poetry By: Km2
Fan fiction



A look at a few of the ways they killed Kenny off, with an interesting twist. This is also a little funnier due to the fact that it hits close to home, being that my name is Kenny. I hope people like this, as I hope that everyone could like everything I produce. But I know such is not the case. I thought of doing this poem in the spirit of giving myself a challenge. Boy was I right. This has to be the most difficult poem, for me to write, that I've written. Another one I literally just wrote today. I do hope it's well received.


Submitted:Mar 13, 2013    Reads: 61    Comments: 11    Likes: 4   


Why, Kenny? Why must you die?

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First killed by, the fallen MIR station

Then exploded from intense, planetarium demonstration

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They killed you from the brown note

Through massive defecation

They even made you kill yourself

With autoerotic asphyxiation

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Dragged by the wheelchair of Timmy

Then drowned in a puddle of pee

Cut in half by Kyle

To end the cursed zombie

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Dismembered by football players

Choked by tether-ball layers

Flatened by an elevator

Electrocuted by generators

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Pummeled with a dodgeball

Crushed by a stagelight, that just so happened to fall

Crushed by a giant "seven", instead of the New Year's Ball

Even had his body ruptured, thanks to rats that crawl

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They switched his heart with a potato

And Ozzy bit off his head

Turned into a duckbilled platypus

Then shot, and ended up dead

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You even got struck by lightning

And trampled by a theater crowd

From Satan's evil goldfish

By his doing, Kenny, even was drowned

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Squashed by a cart containing underpants

Deep within the darkest mine

Even death, by Touch of Death

Why, Kenny? Why must you die?

--------------------------------------------

That's why.





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