Part 2 : Heidi ( 1 Year earlier )
"Come on!" Shibon grabbed my wrist and tugged me forward, i
didn't move, i didn't want to, what was the big deal? " Noo, i
don't want to." I moaned. I made my body go limp so she couldn't
pull me any further. "You've got to! I don't care what you want!"
She said. She was annoyed and very excited at the same time.
"Why?" She let go of my wrist and there was red marks appearing,
great. Her smile dropped and she turned serious. Her plump lips a
fine line. She had concealer on her lips, it was the fashion or
something but i didn't like it, it annoyed me. I preferred it
when she wore lip gloss, it made her lips look even more plump
and it suited her. When in Rome, act like the Romans, she would
state to me when i complained about it. Shibon always used some
stupid saying against me and we would often argue about them but
I'd never win, she was too stubborn, so i just gave up in the
"First of all," she started and glanced at my wrist and prodded
it. "you've got to eat more, its like grabbing a twig." I frowned
at her, i was fed up with that, people always going on about me
possibly having anorexia. I don't have anorexia, i don't care
what they say, I'm perfectly fine. She sighed. "Your mum told me
"I Know what she told you! IM FINE!" I hissed through my teeth.
"Your not fine and you know it!" Whatever, i thought, I'm not
going to argue with her. I rolled my eyes at her dramatically so
she might just get the picture that i was not in the mood to talk
about that. " OK , ok. I'll shut up if u just follow me!" She
grinned again. She made me extremely nervous when she did that. A
gust of wind blew and hair fell in front of my face. Her grin
turned into a genuinely sweet smile and she brushed my hair back
Shibon was like my sister, she's always been there for me but
she's so different. I'm quiet and shes loud. I'm shy and shes
confident, i got long dark hair, she got short blonde hair, she's
good with boys, I'm terrible! Shibon was very pretty too, her
appearance didn't suit her personality. She looked cute not
confident. She was tall and curvy with light freckles and brown
eyes that were stunning! She had a bit of a hip hop taste in
clothing, baggy trousers and a tight crop top with sneakers, this
was casual for her as she danced a lot in school anyway. I
preferred baggy clothes myself, it stopped the rumors of my
health going around. "Just tell me why Shi." I murmured, already
taking a step further. She jumped up and clapped her hands
together twice, a great smile on her face that was so common to
see, her shining teeth were diamonds against her tanned skin
(recently home from Spain.) "Great! OK listen, Callum likes you,"
I sighed, how many times did i need to tell her, i was even tired
of myself saying it. "He's my friend, that's all he wants to be
Shibon." She raised her eyebrows and giggled. "That's what you
think." She winked at me and took my arm again, gentler this time
but i shook her off and followed behind her.
We bumped into Luke on the way to field, he was frowning at me.
He didn't look at Shibon. "Where are you going?" He asked
blankly. I sighed and giggled to myself. "I've been blackmailed
and now being taken hostage." Trying to lighten Luke's mood, he
looked annoyed. He didn't do much as even smile. I dropped the
joke and cleared my thought staring at his eyes. They looked
pissed off then turned to Shibon. "Like i asked, where are you
going?" Shibon rolled her eyes and nodded toward the field. Luke
glanced and saw all the people, he wasn't a people person and his
eyes squinted then he frowned. "I've been waiting for u both at
the tree." Shibon grunted and took me further forward but Luke
put his hand on my chest to stop me going. I stumbled and stood
back smiling at him. Yes, saved by my brother! I thought. "Have
you eaten yet?" He asked grim fully. For god sake can't i just
live my life without people trying to live it for me? "Yes Luke,
i have eaten, in fact we just came out of the hall now so..." I
carried on to the field, this time grabbing Shibon's hand. Luke
stood in my way and rummaged in his bag pulling out a £5 note.
Crap, caught. " Well that's funny," He started, "Because I've got
your dinner money that you 'forgot' to pick up this morning.
Don't lie to me Heidi." He snapped. This was just like him,
protective and moody, trying and succeeding in catching me out.
He raised one eyebrow at me waiting for denial. I didn't say
anything. It was silent for a moment, me and Luke exchanged eyes
and dirty looks. It must have been awkward for Shibon. "'Because
this isn't awkward...come on Hiedi." She moaned, then glared at
Luke who wouldn't budge out of our way. "Il buy her a sandwich."
She hissed and took the fiver from his hand and started off with
me toward the field again, third time lucky? " No thanks guys i
don't want to go to the field with you, thanks for the offer
though" He said sarcastically. He popped a half smile and it was
nice, hes got a good smile with a cute dimple. His smile was very
rare though, he always had something on his mind, and it worried
me. He turned away and waved, still smiling. "FINALLY!" Shibon
yelled dramatically. I giggled and we jogged to field quickly to
avoid any more distractions.
I instantly felt like an outsider on the field. The field was for
cool, popular, self-loving jocks and Bimbo's. I got a few dirty
looks off a few people but it didn't really bother me, what
bothered me was that we were heading straight for a huge group of
people all grinning and whispering things to each other. Great.
Two girls came skipping up to me. Tilulah and Nieve. They were in
the year below me but acted 5 years older and were 100 times more
popular. Tilulah was fairly short but thin, not very curvy but
kind of pretty, she wore too much make-up though, she looked
better without so much on. She had bad history, she was bullied
in primary because she was 'too ugly' and was abused by her
father so she changed, died her hair blonde and wore make-up and
bright clothes, hippie clothes that i wouldn't be caught dead
Today she was wearing skinny jeans and a turtleneck crop top that
was polka doted in different colors and had red stilettoes and a
flower clip in her hair.
Nieve was different, i preferred Nieve, she was more down to
earth, she had her red hair in a clip with a few curls around her
heart shaped face. She was very pretty and had good make-up
skills, i think she had a part time job in hair and beauty salon
but i wasn't sure. She also had skinny jeans on with stylish rips
in them and a GD hoodie on with Ugg boots. She was half smiling,
she tend to keep to herself too unlike Tilulah who really got
herself out there.
Tillulah was whispering something to Shibon for what felt like
ages, i couldn't make anything out, Nieve was smiling at me now
and i felt the earge to smile back but i was too nervous. "Nah
she don't know , i haven't told her." I caught Shibon whisper
"Can someone please tell me what's happening." I said , more as a
command than a question. The two blondes exchanged looks and
Nieve ran off into the crowd a few feet in front of us and
disappeared for a few seconds. Tilulah and Shibon were grinning
again. I hated that. A few nerve-racking seconds later, Nieve was
with Callum. I hadn't seen him all day today which was unusual,
he usually comes up and we chat.
He was a good looking boy, he had longish dark brown hair and a
strong face and features but with a cute beauty spot above his
upper lip. He was well built with a 6 pack apparently (which i
did like very much.) Rumors said we would've made a good couple ,
but i never would've thought of us as one, we were too different.
I automatically new where this was going, and i didn't want it
to. Groups of people who usually intimidate me and make fun were
gathering around me , giggling and making sarcastic comments.
Where was this attention coming from all of a sudden? All i did
know was that i hated it! Callum was getting shoved and prodded
towards me. His cheeks were turning from pink to a light red and
sweat was dripping from his forehead, i didn't know if it was
from nerves or from a football game at the start of lunchtime.
This was wrong, there was no way i was going to go with this. My
stomach started churning and i felt a golf ball rise in my
thought, choking me. My head started spinning and everything was
a blur. I cupped my mouth, flung my spare hand on Shibon's
shoulder then pelted off the field.
It didn't even feel like i was running, it felt like i was
floating in the air, or the floor was taking me away from the
I was out of view, finally. My knees whacked each other and i
stumbled to the ground. My ankle twisted on the way down but it
felt like a snap. A shock of pain shot up my leg and screamed
out. It was cut short, quick enough for nobody to take any
notice, but my chin hit a rock, and i snapped down on my tongue.
I could taste a rusty, stale taste in my mouth, drowning my taste
buds. I felt a burning in my throught again and the golf ball was
still there, but it felt like the club had hit it and it was
flying through my throught to the hole, my mouth.
I cupped it again but it was too late. I threw up over my hand,
up my sleeve, and the ground in front of me. Tears starting to
wheal up in my eyes, blurring my vision even more, but it wasn't
hurting me, i was so used to being sick, it was as common as
Once i was finished, i let my arms fall under my body and i lay
there. Hair was covering my eyes, i didn't care if it was in the
vomit on the floor. There wasn't much too it, just watery liquid,
slightly orange, no chunks. I didn't realize i was holding my
breath. I let it out slowly through my nose. There was a horrific
after taste in my mouth and my throught felt like i had drank a
gallon of gasoline and ate a lit match.
After a few seconds of peaceful silence and relief, i heard
footsteps, jogging footsteps and then my name being called, the
voice had cracked half way through. Luke. I lifted my eyes and
glanced around. I was near enough to the tree and Luke had heard
my screech. God only imagine what i looked like. Luke's
expression was half way between horrified but not surprised. His
feet were touching my cheek and he just stood there. I let my
head flop back down the floor and i closed my eyes. I didn't have
the strength to do anything else.
After a few awkward seconds of silence between us, he knelt down
next to me, lifted my head onto his lap and was wiping my hair
off my face. He let out a great sigh and kissed my forehead. "Oh
Hiedi, My Hiedi , what am i going to do with you?" I closed my
eyes and didn't say anything. I knew it should be time to get
moving otherwise we would draw a crowd, and that's the last thing
i needed, but i couldn't bring myself to do it, i didn't have it
in me. Luke knew that and scooped me up into his arms, like i was
weightless, and he took me to the medical room where he lay next
to me for an hour, staring into my eyes and stroking my hair
until Mum showed up.
When i woke up next i was in the safety of my bed. "Live forever"
by Oasis was softly playing in the background. My eyes were
sticky and i couldn't open them, my eyelashes were stuck
together. When was i crying? I picked away all the gunk from my
eyes and i squinted them open. My room was spotless, not how i
had left it. My main light was off but the fairy lights around my
bed were twinkling, showing a red tint to the dark bedroom. On
the bedside table next to me was a tray of untouched cold food. A
piece of toast with butter, A bowl of porridge, orange juice and
a latte. The latte looked yum, i needed a hot drink, my throught
didn't burn anymore but it was unbearably dry. I didn't want to
even look at the food, i couldn't eat, not now anyway.
I kicked off the blanked with my feet and what felt like
lightning shot up my leg. I went to scream but nothing came out.
Two warm hands sprung from nowhere and rested on my head, laying
me back onto the bed. My mum was sitting on the chair on the
other side of my bed and had been watching me for last...well i
don't want to know how long. I grasped my ankle with my hand
gently but something was covering it, a sock with no toe part. "
You just tore the ligaments in your ankle, it's not too bad but
it's best if u stay in bed for now, Darling." My mums angelic
voice floated through my ears and rested I'm head. It was great
to hear her. She tucked my legs back under the blanket, so gently
it was like she wasn't even touching me. I was so grateful for
that. I smiled at her but couldn't speak. Her hair was short,
flicked at the end, died red with blonde highlights. She was hip
for a mother in her 40s. She was slim with a rounded face, red
lipstick as always on her thin lips and her blue eyes that stand
out for a mile. " How about some food, baby?" I pulled a face, i
wasn't up for eating. " Can i have a fresh latte?" i croaked out.
"Sure, but Honey, you must eat something, you've got an empty
stomach." She said, more sternly that usual. I groaned "Mum,
please, I'm not up for this now, I'm not in the mood, can i just
have a latte." She stood up and i sat up.
"Heidi, you are turning-" I cut her off,
"Mum, not now! Please." She frowned and walked to the door. "Ok,
I'll be up with your latte in a minute." She smiled and turned to
walk down stairs. I waited until the footsteps were in the
kitchen and then i lay back down. I covered my face with my hands
and let out a load sigh. "You complain when mum does nothing for
you, and you complain when she does everything. She cant win with
you can she?" Luke walked in smiling sympathetically.
"Theres a hard line between being a good mum and being a
smothering , over protective mother. She doesn't see it." I
joked. I moved my hands and smiled back at him. His hair was very
shaggy, serious bedhead, and he was wearing a white vest with a
stain on the side, and blue stripped boxers. Typical teenage boy.
"How are you feeling?" He asked, i sat up and ran my fingers
through my hair. "Better." I answered simply. He slouched down on
the end of my bed, glared at my foot like it was some sort of
spider he thought he had killed, then nudged the tray of food.
"Still not eating?" I tilted my head and gave him a 'don't-start'
look. He nodded and pinched his lips to the one side of his face
and raised his eye brows. It was a stupid look but he always did
it. "I'm fine." I assured him. He Took in a deep breath, tapped
my knee and bounced up off my bed then let it out. He was nosing
through my books on the shelf and took in another breath as if to
say something, but stopped. "What?" i asked.
"So Callum asked you out did he?" He wasn't looking at me, just
flicking through a Tracy Beaker book i borrowed from Primary
school years ago and 'forgot' to give it back. I sighed again.
"Look nothing happened, i-" I got cut off by mum walking up the
stairs. Luke put the book back down and sat on the end of the bed
again, facing the door. She came into the room, one hand on a
cup, the other on the plate it was on and was staring at it.
"Here is your favorite. Caramel Cream Latte with 2 chocolate
digestive biscuits on the side." Luke stood up and took it from
her. "Why, thank you mother, this is my favorite." He said. "A
splendid beverage my dear." He joked and handed me the cup and
put the plate on the blanket over my thighs. Mum sat back on her
chair by my bed and they were both staring at me. I took a sip of
my drink, it was delicious, it had my favorite smooth creamy
taste and throth was on my upper lip. Just like in movies. Mmm. I
put the plate and cup on the bedside table on the tray. "So i
rang the school, baby, i told them your going to be off for the
next few days. But Luke," She turned to him, grinning, "Somebody
better twist their ankle if they think that they are getting out
of school." She winked at him. "Get dressed kiddo, I'll take you
up to school today." Luke Groaned and turned very annoyed. "Look
mum i can drive my car, I'll be fine, its been a year!"
Last year Luke had had a serious car crash, he was a bit tipsy
from a school party and drove too fast down the motorway and went
straight into another car. Luckily nobody was seriously injured
and the person in the other car didn't press charges because she
was around 60 years old and felt sorry for Luke as he had a
broken leg and a few cuts and bruises. He was in hospital for a
few days but you'd think by how Mum was reacting, he had broken
his neck and every other bone in his body. I had to drive him to
school everyday after that. Mum didn't trust him.
She rolled her eyes and held her fingers to her temple. "Look,
Luke, Honey, I'm not going through this again, it's only been 10
months, and i said that a year from the day of the accident you
can drive again, you got a few more months yet. That's final, I'm
not saying it again. Now get dressed." He shrugged and stood up,
tapping my knee again and left the room. "I'm going to pop to the
shop quick before i take him up, i wont be long, want anything?"
She murmured, getting up and picking up the tray, taking off the
latte and biscuits. I shook my head. "Wheres Alpha and Mishka?" I
asked. Alpha and Mishka are out two dogs, Alpha being the male
German Shepard and Mishka being the girl Husky. We bought them
when i was 10. Alpha was Luke's Christmas present and Mishka was
"Alpha is with your dad, he's taking him for a walk. Mishka is
downstairs, call her up if u like." She said. I whistled and
after a few seconds i could just make out a few faint steps on
the stairs and then she came strutting into my room, jumped on my
bed, licked my face and circled at the end of my bed and then lay
down. She had long, thick fur and was so lovable, she couldn't
hurt a fly, and was extremely gentle and protective over everyone
in the family. I sat up and ran fingers through her fur while mum
left and went downstairs again.
I sat up and lifted up my pillow. My phone was there and it had
12 messages and 3 missed calls on it. I didn't need to guess who
it was, it was Shibon, no doubt about it. I flicked it open and
read through each message. " OMG R U OK BBZ? xx" " How r u
heids?" "R U In Tmro? xx" "Wat 'hapned??xx" All desperate texts
off her, i didn't bother answering them, she'd only ask more
questions. Besides, by then she would've guessed that my phone
was dead or out of credit.
I checked the numbers on the missed calls. Two from Shibon and
One from Callum. I was shocked at first, it surprised me. I
wasn't sure if it cheered me up, or worried me even more. All i
knew is that i was curious on why he rang me. Did the whole
school know? I decided to ring him back, but only chat briefly. I
clicked call and waited...one ring...two rings...three rings... I
started to get butterflies in my stomach. Why was i
nervous?....four rings....five....six....Answer Phone. Oh well ,
i thought I'd try later, or he would ring me back anyway.
I checked the time on my phone, seven fourteen. I usually
wouldn't get up this early if i wasn't going to school but i was
awake now and had a latte to drink so i got up.
I drank the rest of my latte and hopped out of my room. Mum came
rushing up the stairs. "Getting up already are you?" She looked
concerned but took my arm and helped me down the stairs. Mum got
awful clingy when i was ill. Her attention was uncomforting but
it was better than nothing so i didn't complain.
I slouched down on the sofa in the living room, and grabbed my
laptop off the arm of the chair and flicked it open. Mum had
already turned on the TV and had stuck on a decent program, but i
wasn't really bothered.
Facebook was already up on the laptop, it was Luke's page. I
logged off and logged back onto mine. 4 Notifications and 1
message. I scrolled through the notifications, one was a
Farmville request, another was a rate-your-class-mates, a boy
Mika had rated me 3. Another from someone commenting on a photo i
liked of Shibon's and the last one was that Shibon had posted
something on my wall. I clicked it and it took me to my profile.
My Profile picture was a simple photo of me sitting in long grass
in the back fields last month with Luke, i was looking away from
the camera and my hair was blowing over my face, i was laughing,
i remember Luke cracking a joke to make me smile, since i always
pouted when i had a photo taken. It was a really pretty picture,
but it was about time i changed it. Shibon had posted on my wall
yesterday night "You okay babes, ring me back, we got to talk
about what happened on the field." I was not going to ring her
back, i was not in the mood. I clicked on the message, it was
from Callum. I hesitated then read it.
Are you okay? Heard u were ill and snapped your ankle today.
Ouch. I want to say sorry for what happened on the field. I know
you know what i was going to do, that's why you ran away right?
Well it was meant to be just a quiet talk between us both about
it but the word spread and well, i think it's fair to say it got
crazy out of hand! Sorry about that, i know it embarrassed you
but please forgive me? I'll come over tomorrow after school and
we can do it properly okay. Think about it Heid. :) xx"
Reading that made my stomach churn. I felt sick again. So Shibon
wasn't lying, the rumors were true, and they were coming for me
today, after school, and i was expected to give an answer. Argh!
Was i meant to write anything back? What was i meant to say?
Nothing. I left the reply box blank.
Luke came jogging down the stairs and jumped onto the sofa, right
next to me and started tying up his Hightop trainers. He was
wearing baggy dark jeans with stylish rips in them and a black
Slipnot hoodie. His hair was left unbrushed and shaggy like usual
but was covered by his hood. Once he was done he gave me a quick
smile, but i could see it wasn't real. He was going to be lost in
school without me. He had hardly any friends, he tend to keep to
himself and me. We had the same classes together and hung around
with each other at break times. There was no way he was going to
even consider talking to Shibon, he hated her as much as she
hated him. I was the only reason they looked at each other at
most. Oh well, it was only 6 hours, no doubt he'd be texting me
through the day anyway. Mum came practically skipping into the
room with Mishka on her side. "Dad will be home any minute Hied.
I wont be long, and hour tops." She gave me a smile, although it
didn't hide her concern. "You got my number if u need anything
though right? Are you going to be okay?" Her smile dropped. "Yes
mum, I'm fine, honest, don't worry." I shot her a reassuring
smile but she didn't seem satisfied, the concern stayed. She
pulled down Luke's hood and tapped his head. "C'mon then Luke,
let's be off." Luke jumped back off the sofa pulling his hood
back onto his head, mum rolled her eyes at him, she hated his
style as much as she hated mine and we hated hers. She always
bought us new clothes, desperately trying to make us
look...well...normal. We never even considered putting them on.
Luke ran his fingers through my hair and kissed my forehead. "
See you." He said and then they left the house. I was alone to
think at last.