I waited in the darkness for the pain to come, but it never did.  Confused, I tested myself.  First, I shifted a finger, then an arm, and then my whole body.  Nothing.  I took a deep breath, and was pleased that my lungs were still in tacked as well.  A soft breeze floated across me and I shivered.  My fever was gone.  Did I die? 

 

I cracked one eye open cautiously.  Then I opened them both and sighed.  I wasn’t dead.  I couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing.  I pushed myself into a sitting position and evaluated my situation.

 

I was lying in a bed, in a vast room.  Strange floating bubbles of silvery golden light scattered across the walls lighted the room.  Across from the bed was a large vanity with a mirror almost as tall as I was.  Another breeze swept across my body.  Magnificent wooden doors were opened to a stone balcony.  The doors were decorated with sheer silver fabrics that billowed elegantly in the breeze.  I wondered how long I had been unconscious as I gazed out into the night sky.

 

I pulled myself from the bed.  I moved to walk but my foot stepped on something that sent me forward on my hands and knees with a smack.  I composed myself quickly and inspected what I had stepped on.  I gasped in disgust.  I was wearing a dress. 

 

Okay.  So I was wearing a dress before, but I was at the mercy of my mother with that one.  I absolutely loathed wearing anything frilly or otherwise girly.  This was impossible.

 

I carefully stepped over to the vanity so I could get a good look at myself.  I stopped suddenly, my mouth falling open.  The dress was pretty.  Thick bands hugged my shoulders while the neckline came down into a delicate V across my chest.  A shear silvery fabric flowed from the straps at my shoulders down a quarter inch past the tips of my fingers.  The whole ensemble glittered with a pretty blue and silver but that isn’t why I gaped. 

 

The reflection starring back at me was a complete stranger.  She was wearing the same dress that I was, but she looked so much better in it than I did.  She looked like a goddess.  Too perfect, too beautiful to be a thing of reality.  Her hair was a shocking strawberry blonde pinned to the nape of her neck, not like my usual dirty blonde frizz.  Eyes were green with that same silver ring around them, and her features were soft with a golden radiant glow.  She was taller than I was by three inches, and she had the most amazing curves.  The dress hugged all the right spots and flowed gracefully to the floor. 

 

A silver pendant hung delicately from her neck.  Something was different about it though.  Instead of the cold hard blue stone that clung to it, a brilliant almost liquid turquoise color sparkled back.  It seemed to resonate with the glow of the surrounding skin it rested against. 

 

I lifted my hand to touch my reflection.  This was my reflection.  Tears stung the corners of my eyes.  I felt lost, confused, alone, and angry all at the same time.  I wanted answers.  I needed answers.  I needed an explanation for what was happening to me.  This person starring back at me wasn’t me.  I never asked for this, for any of this.  

 

I blinked back the tears threatening to break loose from my eyes.  I walked to the door with a vengeance.  If no one will offer me an explanation, then I’m going to force it out of someone.  My resolve was solid until I opened the large brown door and turned the corner ramming right into something hard.

 

I bounced back lightly and fell on my backside hard.  The air whooshed from my lungs, and I thought I saw stars for a minute.  I shook my head slightly as a hand closed around my arm, yanking me back on my feet roughly.  The contact sent a shock trickling through my body and I yanked my arm back.  I looked up and found Ennissyen eyeing me curiously.  I couldn’t decipher the look in his eyes, and I felt heat rush to my face. 

 

What was I doing again? Answers!  I was going to find answers to my questions, I reminded myself furiously.

 

“You!” I bellowed angrily.  I recovered enough to stand my ground.  I wasn’t going to let his perfect eyes, his perfect face, or his perfect body derail me from getting the answers I needed!

 

“Me?”  He dropped his hands to his sides with narrowed eyes.

 

“Yes you!  This is all entirely your fault!” I shrieked, my voice raising three octaves. 

 

“My Fault?” He tried to interject, but I cut him off.  I was on a roll now, and no one was going to stop me.

 

“Look at me!  I’m a Freak!  I don’t even look the same!”  I waved my hand at myself angrily and I saw something flash across his face.  Was that a smirk?  “I don’t know where I am, I don’t even know who you are.”

 

“You never asked.”  Ennissyen offered smugly folding his arms over his chest, “And I wouldn’t call you a freak…”

 

“Never asked?”  I repeated incredulously, ignoring his open appraisal.  Was he serious?  “A gentleman would have offered!”  I let a disgusted sound rip from my body.

 

“Of all the arrogant, pig-headed men to encounter, I get you!”  His expression hardened.  Ha! A reaction!  “You should have let that monster kill me.  It would have been easier on the both of us!”  He flinched.

 

“Admit it.”  I said, breathing hard from all the rage.

 

“You’re being Absurd!”  He yelled back, clearly just as angry now.  His hands curled into fists at his side. 

 

“Absurd?”  I balked.  “Please explain my apparent absurdities.”

 

We glowered at each other for a few long moments.  He didn’t offer a response, and I smiled smugly.  “That’s what I thought.”

 

I turned on my heels picking up the hem of my distastefully beautiful dress and began to stalk off in the opposite direction.

 

“Where are you going?”  Ennissyen yelled angrily to my back.  I glared over my shoulder.

 

“To find someone who will give me answers because clearly you’re inept at being civil enough to do so.  Why don’t you go play with your swords?”  I shouted.  I heard him growl angrily.

 

My anger never lost its pulse.  I just kept walking.  Questions swirled in my head.  I tried to make sense of all the events leading up to this point, but was at a loss for words.  I pushed past a door blindly and stopped when a gust of wind hit my face.  I blinked.  I was outside.  I was standing on the threshold of a vast garden. 

 

I took a few steps forward to a stone bench resting off to the side.  I plopped down and sighed.  The garden was beautiful, like everything else about this place.  Even me, I thought suppressing a grimace. 

 

The unusual flowers sparkled iridescent silver in the moonlight, and the only sound that escaped the darkness was the slow trickle of nearby fountains.  It had a calming effect like nothing I had ever felt before.  My anger seeped away from me, and tears started stinging the corners of my eyes again.  I felt a cool hand on my arm, and jumped slightly.

 

“Here you are.”  A musical voice whispered. 

 

Tarren was sitting next to me on the stone bench.  It was like she popped out of thin air, I wonder how she does that.  I turned to look at her concerned face, and lost all my composure.

 

“Oh Tarren…” I whispered and threw my arms around her neck. 

 

Sobs ripped through my body while I buried my face deep into her shoulder.  She didn’t push me away like I thought she would.  Instead, she wrapped her arms around me soothingly, and rubbed my back in slow circles.  She began to hum an unfamiliar song under her breath, and before long my sobs quieted to nothing more than tears.  We sat like that for a long while, before I pulled away from her.

 

I swiped at my face absentmindedly.  I’m sure I looked a mess.  I stared at the grass for a moment, trying to compose my thoughts before looking at Tarren again.  She took both my hands in hers and smiled reassuringly.

 

“Tarren…” I croaked unevenly.

 

“You have questions.”  It was more of a statement than a question.  I nodded my head.  She sighed.  “I thought you might.  I will try my best to answer what I can.”

 

My eyes widened.  Finally, someone was going to give me answers.  My relief was short lived though as I processed what she said.

 

“What you can?” I narrowed my eyes.  She laughed lightly.

 

“Not even I know everything Vala.”  She flashed perfectly white teeth at me before settling in to answer my sea of questions.  “If I can answer the question, then I promise to do so truthfully.” 

 

“Vala?” I asked curiously after a long pause.  I watched her confused expression turn to recognition in an instant.

 

“Chosen One.”  She stated matter-of-factly.  “It’s someone who is chosen by the divine to guard and protect lord and land from the beasts of darkness.”  I saw her grimace at the last part.

 

“Beasts of darkness?” I raised my eyebrow.  She smiled again.

 

“Shall I tell you the history of our land before we continue your quest for truth?”  I looked skeptically at her.  She ignored my expression and pulled me to walk beside her through the garden.

 

I watched her patiently as she thoughtfully tapped her index finger to her lower lip. Clearly she was trying to figure out where to start.  I took in a deep breath, and tried to keep an open mind.  Nothing was making much sense to me so far, and I was pretty sure whatever she was about to tell me wouldn’t either.  She stopped and turned to me for a second.

 

“Did shadow slayer offer any explanation to you before your time in Awsta?” I knew of whom she was talking about, and she must have seen me flinch at the name.

 

“No.”  I offered, letting resentment sting my voice.  An amused look crossed her face as she turned to start our casual stroll through the garden again.

 

“Well then, Vala we shall start from the very beginning.  It will be easier that way.”  She decided with a nod to herself.

 

“Arie.”  I interjected before she got any further.  She looked at me confused again.  “My name.”

 

“Arie.”  She repeated with a whisper.  As if it were a foreign word she had spoken for the first time.  “Is that short for a longer name?”

 

“Yes.  Arianna.”  I answered, confused by the urgent undertone to her musical voice.  She thought about that for a second before returning her attention to my history lesson.

 

Well then, Arie,” She smiled over at me.  It didn’t quite reach her black eyes. “Let us imagine the wheel of a wagon with seven spokes joining in the center.”  She looked over at me to make sure I was following, and I nodded for her to continue.  I took a mental note.  Wagon wheel.  Seven spokes.  Got it.    

 

“We call this wheel Eres, and between each of the spokes of Eres rest a single civilization.  There are seven altogether.  Now, long ago when Eres was first born, the boundaries between civilizations weren’t as clearly defined. Everyone eventually grew fearful of the neighboring lands, and chaos began to erupt everywhere.  Great lords warred with each other over women, money, conquest- you name it they wanted it.  Soon destruction threatened the land itself.  The asgre was fading fast, and famine and disease began to spread rapidly.”

 

“Asgre?” I interrupted with curiosity.  She stopped and pointed to an overgrown flower bush just as a silver wave glistened across it.

 

“Asgre is the life of this land.  It is the very thing that formed our existence.  It is the reason for our…abilities.” I noticed she struggled with the last word, and filed that away for later. 

 

“Eres was in danger because a few of the Lords discovered they had an ability that no other had.  For some reason the asgre was stronger in them than the rest.  We’re still unsure why this is, but they began to exploit it to gain their desires.  Corruption was evident, and a shadow began to grow over Eres.

 

“Now, these dark leaders were so unbelievably blinded by their power and greed, that they didn’t notice a resistance forming.  They were arrogant, and scoffed at the warnings their advisors gave about others who had exhibited the potential for the great power.  Egotistical they were, these Lords felt they were the only ones chosen to have the power.  They felt like Gods.  They felt untouchable.  But the warnings were true. 

 

“Like all wheels, Eres held a central point, and it is thought that life sprang from this point into what we have today.  So the ground there is sacred, and it was untouched by the seeds of destruction the Lords left behind.  This is where the small group of oppressors decided to meet.  That is where the plan was formed to bring down the dark lords and return asgre to the land.

 

“They assumed this would restore the balance of life.”  Tarren looked at me to make sure I was keeping up.  Surprisingly, I found myself enthralled.  I quickly nodded for her to continue.  I was anxious to hear what happened.  She smiled at my enthusiasm.

 

“This small band of oppressors claimed the sacred sanctuary as neutral ground between all civilizations.  Oppressors from each were present, and so they signed a peace treaty making the meeting place official and formed our first council before getting down to the urgent business at hand.  The seven most powerful stepped forward to offer their services and a plan was devised.

 

“The plan that was formed, the seven agreed, should remain a secret until the final moment before their time to attack.  If their enemy brethren discovered how to use the power the way the seven did, then all hope for the future would have been lost.”  Tarren said with a grim overtone.

 

“What did they discover?”  My voice couldn’t quite hide the awe I felt.  She giggled slightly, pleased with her story telling ability no doubt.

 

“The council of oppressors agreed to meet again in a fortnight.  Time passed and the hour drew near for the plan to unravel but something wasn’t quite right.  One of the chosen seven discovered a traitor amidst the council.  They realized, almost too late, that the enemy was forming their armies just outside the sanctuary walls preparing for a surprise attack.  Word was sent, and the seven convened.  They decided to empty the sacred city of the council.  They didn’t want innocent blood spilled on their hands.  The only ones that remained were the seven, and their respective chosen.”  She stated.

 

“The Vala.”  I whispered slowly connecting the dots.  She nodded once, and then continued before I had time to completely process what that meant.

 

“The seven underwent a ritual of asgre and connected their spirits with Eres.  The ceremony was done to ask Eres for forgiveness, and to ask permission to atone for their crimes and the crimes of their enemy brethren.  Eres was very forgiving, and offered the sevens’ Vala a unique ability to eradicate the corruption from the land for a price.  The Vala accepted the new abilities willingly, understanding the consequences of doing so.  You see they felt the need for restoring the land greater than their own personal need.  This is why they were chosen in the first place.

 

“The ritual finished with only minutes to spare before the first attacks hit.  The battle was gruesome and there were casualties on both sides.  I will spare your heart the details, but just know the enemy didn’t know what hit him, and neither did we.”  A sad tone entered Tarrens’ voice now.  “The battle lasted only 11 hours, and on the 11th hour the dark lords were slain.  The asgre was given back to the land, and finally the shadows were lifted from the hearts of the people.

 

“Order was restored, but not without great effort.  People still feared each other.  The Vala were dispatched to their own civilizations to help rebuild what they lost and help set up governing systems.  Boundaries were carefully drawn through meticulous meetings.  The one thing that stayed constant throughout the healing process was the council.  It convened every so often to oversea larger conflict between the lands.  They act as a neutral, common ground for the Heads to air their personal views on such immediate issues.  In this way, order was kept for nearly hundreds of years.”  Tarren sighed sadly.  I tried to decipher her expression, but got nothing out of it.

 

We walked in silence while she collected her thoughts for a minute.  I seized the opportunity to ask a question.

 

“You said that order was kept for hundreds of years.”  I peaked at her from the corner of my eye and saw her nod for me to go on.  “Well I was just wondering what happened to the seven that had stepped forward.”

 

She seemed to regard my question carefully before answering.  “You remember what I said about there being consequences to accepting the gift Eres offered?”  I nodded my head, and she sighed, seeming to weigh each word before she said it.

 

“The Seven and their Vala…well, they don’t age as quickly as the rest.”  She rushed through the last of the sentence and watched my expression, almost fearfully.

 

“Oh.” is all I could say to her response as my heart stopped in my chest.  What did that mean for me?  She seemed to sense my panic and quickly pressed on.   

 

“After all the treaties were signed and peace and balance returned, the sevens’ life cycle continued of course.  The same with the Vala, but they knew that, should Eres request it, they would return to protect the land.  That was the consequence for accepting Eres’ help.  As long as Eres needed them, then they were bound to the land and their duty.”  She answered trying to give me a reassuring smile.  It wasn’t helping the situation.  I fought to keep myself calm, and then something struck me.  I looked up into Tarrens’ eyes.

 

“Why does Eres need the Vala now?”  I asked, reality ripping me from the throes of the history lesson. 

 

I was afraid to hear the answer.  I knew I didn’t want to hear it, I already knew it in my heart somehow.  Tarren pulled me to a stone bench positioned next to a large fountain.  She took a deep breath, and stared at my face for a long moment.  My heart beat against my chest hard.

 

“Even though I told you to imagine Eres like a wheel, it’s not perfect.  Beyond the natural borders of some of the civilizations, the exiles set up their own cities after the war.  They were banished by the Vala and the council for their unyielding allegiance to the dark lords and their wicked ways.”  My breath was becoming more ragged, and Tarren tried to rub my arm to comfort me.  “They seek revenge on the Vala and Eres, and have gained power and support over the years.  They even infiltrated some of the cities close to the borders to force people to their side.  They began threatening the governing leaders of some of the civilizations into surrender.

 

“The weaker leaders yielded to avoid unnecessary blood shed, but it only caused more.  The balance is slowly starting to tip again, and Eres feels a terrible storm coming.  The Vala were re-awakened and are gathering.  That is why you were called here.”  Tarren stared at my blank expression anxiously.

 

The garden started to swirl in circles.  Bells clamored loudly in my ears, and I dropped my head between my knees.  I couldn’t breath.  Tarren was kneeling in front of me now, her expression full of concern and worry.  Her lips were moving, but I couldn’t make sense of the garble reaching my ears.  I was trying to take deep breaths to calm my heart. 

 

We sat like that until my breathing eventually returned to normal and the bells went silent.  I didn’t move to lift my head though.  I was still trying to process the information I had just heard.  I opened my mouth to ask a question that had been burning my lips all evening, but couldn’t bring myself to speak it.  I shifted slightly, and asked another question instead, curiosity winning out over panic for the moment.

 

“Tarren?”  I asked cautiously.  I still kept my head against my knees.

 

“Hmm?”  She whispered softy.

 

“When you found us in the forest, you knew I was a Vala.”  I stated.

 

“Mm-hmm.”  She responded softly.

 

“How?” There was a long pause, and I had to look up to be sure she was still sitting in the grass in front of me.  I hedged her on, “I remember you telling…” I shook my head, refusing to speak his name. “You said that you could tell because of a change, and…smell.” 

 

Tarren sucked in a lung full of air and let it out in a long sigh.  It seemed she was trying to decide how best to tell me; her expression flitted through several different emotions all at once before settling into a smooth mask of indifference.

 

“The smell” She emphasized the word ever so subtly “comes from a rare flower that lives within the walls of our sanctuary.  They have special, rare properties about them.  It is thought they were born to this land when Eres was only days old.  The unique properties are not found in any other plant life on Eres, and are regarded highly for this reason.  They are extremely valuable and sacred, and of course, guarded closely to ensure they do not grow extinct.

 

“The plant itself has naturally adapted over the years, as well, to discourage harvesting.  The stems have grown over in thorns, and are venomous.  If pricked, you would only have a matter of minutes until death claimed you.  During the ceremony of forgiveness the seven conducted with their Vala, they knew that Eres would question their loyalty to the land before agreeing to their request.  She had already given her gifts freely, and was betrayed by her children.  She needed reassurance. 

 

“So the seven, and the Vala each, pricked themselves with the sacred flower to prove that their duty was more valuable then life itself.  Eres was convinced of their sincerity, and granted them life and the ability to fulfill their promises.”  Tarren grabbed my right hand and turned it palm side up and pointed.

 

I looked closely at my palm.  My mouth fell open at what I saw.  In the center of my right palm, there was a faint outline of a flower.  It had four petals and a center point that was almost black, like I was accidentally dotted with an ink pen.  The flower looked as though it were burned into my skin, only faintly visible at the slightest of angles. 

 

Oh my god.  I have a tattoo.  The only thing that I could think of at that moment was how my mother would react.  She was going to freak out.  It was a ridiculous reaction to this obvious oath of life long servitude to an invisible person I didn’t even know, but I just couldn’t wrap my brain around anything else.

 

I let my hand drop back into my lap, and looked at Tarren.  She saw the unspoken question burning in my eyes.  And why the hell do I have a tattoo?

 

“It serves as a reminder for the Vala of their Oath to Eres, and of the life she so generously returned in order to fulfill it.”  She pointed to my hand again.  Oh.  That explains it.  “The fragrance of the flower comes from the venom in the stem.  When the Vala pricked their hand, the venom mixed with their blood.  That is why you have a distinct smell.”

 

I sniffed my skin and grimaced.  I definitely didn’t smell like any flowers I knew.  Tarren seemed amused by that and giggled softly.

 

“The smell is the strongest evidence of a Vala.”  Tarren continued contorting her face in mock disgust and then smiled again. “The other way is the change.  It’s very similar to the way a girl becomes a woman; the steady changes in her body, the growth spasms.  In the Vala the change is considerably quicker, and more painful as you have no doubt figured out.  The painful feverish heat and the physical changes are all symptoms. 

 

“But over time, it seemed harder to tell which person exhibited the potential for a Vala and just someone with an unusual amount of asgre.  It seemed that someone found a way to imitate the fragrance almost perfectly.  So before the seven returned to the land to complete their life cycle, they convened and formed a birthstone for each Vala to prove that they were genuine.”  Tarren then pointed to my pendant.  My hand absentmindedly played with the chain as she continued.

 

“The stone is designed to resonate with the Valas’ blood, and can be used as a source of power for some.”  Tarren looked confused for a second as she looked at my pendant.  I looked down and it was still glowing liquid turquoise.  “I’ve never seen a birthstone that color before.”

 

“Maybe I’m not a Vala after all.”  I gushed with a little too much hope.  Tarren shook her head.

 

“You still have the smell.”  My heart sank again.  Oh yeah.  I forgot about that.  I sniffed my arm again.  Ugh!  There was definitely no flowery fragrance. 

 

I sighed with resign.  I thought I would be less confused if I had the answers to my questions but now I was even more confused than before.  I suddenly wanted to close the mythical box I just opened.

 

I was still unsure of everything around me, and I felt my hand was just forced into something I didn’t even fully understand.  I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to understand.  I didn’t want to fight black monsters, or protect the land.  This wasn’t my home this wasn’t my war.  How can someone expect me to protect something I didn’t even believe in myself?  Tarren was trying hard to read my expression but to no avail I’m sure.  She took my hands in hers and I could see the question burning in her eyes. 

 

I felt slighted.  Didn’t I have a choice in this matter?  Didn’t I get a say in my future?  I felt like a puppet in the grand scheme of things and I didn’t much like the feeling of the strings swiftly tugging at my arms.  I pulled my hands away from hers.  I looked away.  I knew what I was about to say would probably cause her a little bit of grief.  After all, she did save my life assuming I would take up arms to defend her home.  At least it felt that way to me.

 

“Look,” I started, unsure how to get the words out without seeming too harsh.  “This is…well…you can’t…” Ah hell.  I took a deep breath and squared my shoulders.  “I don’t want to be apart of this.” 

 

I had to look away.  The expression on her face looked as if I just stabbed her square in the heart.  I was suddenly very aware of the tattoo on my right palm.  It tingled faintly, or was that just my imagination?

 

“It’s your destiny, your birth right.”  She said quietly, her eyes still wide from the shock of my confession. 

 

My resolve wavered, and then crumbled to dust at the inflection of her protest, and I sighed.  Great.  Now it was a birthright, except I didn’t even know about it until an hour ago.  I moved next to her on the grass and took her hands in mind.

 

“I never asked for this.  Don’t I have a choice?”  I pleaded trying to find some kind of reassurance, but I knew she couldn’t offer me any.  The regret of telling her those awful words scorched me.  I’m too soft I chided myself.  Where was the backbone?

 

“At least…” I took another deep breath, knowing full well what this would mean to her. “At least let me have some time to think it over.” 

 

I hated lying.  I knew that my mind was made up, but for some reason I wanted to spare her feelings for as long as possible.  She was the only comfort to this foreign place so far, and I couldn’t afford to loose that emotional connection. 

 

She considered my words for a moment and it almost seemed like she saw through them, but smiled tentatively and nodded in agreement with my compromise.  I sighed in relief, and stretched out in the cool grass to look up at the jeweled night sky. 

 

“Tarren?”  I asked softly after a while.  My mind wandered over her recent explanation, and I came up confused on one part.

 

“Hmm?”  I heard her murmur. 

 

“You said that someone learned to imitate the fragrance in the blood.”  I took the silence as a cue to continue.  “Do you think they could learn how to imitate these birthstones too?”  I snuck a sideways glance and saw a thoughtful expression play across her face.

 

“It’s possible to do I guess.  But they would need a Valas’ blood in order to do it, and even then, the stone wouldn’t work for anyone other than that specific Vala.”  She seemed satisfied with her response and smiled.  “Remember that the stone resonates with the blood.”

 

I brooded over the impossibility for a while.  The thrill and anguish of the night slowly dwindled away until exhaustion was left.  I stifled a yawn, and Tarren chuckled.  She was on her feet pulling me up off the grass in an instant.

 

“We had better make our way back before you grow unconscious again.” My cheeks stung with embarrassment.  It wasn’t my fault that my body shut down at the first sign of danger, it was like clockwork.  We trudged back through the garden slowly.

 

“What’s on your mind?” I asked Tarren curiously.  Her forehead was creased with intense concentration. 

 

“I was just trying to figure out what it was that you disliked so much about shadow slayer.”  She eyed me carefully.  There was something under the surface of her eyes that I couldn’t quite make out.  Thoughts of tonight’s recent outburst flooded my mind, and I clamped my jaw down tight.

 

“A few things come to mind.”  I hissed through gritted teeth.  Her musical laugh caught me off guard.  I looked at her stunned.  I didn’t think I was being funny.  She looked at me with an apologetic smile before explaining.

 

“I’m sorry,” She giggled again “It’s just that, in the short time that we’ve spent together, I still have yet to figure you out.”  She laughed again.

 

“I beg your pardon?”  I managed to say, utterly taken aback now.  She shook her head at me.

 

“It’s nothing.” She sighed, “It’s just…well I’m usually able to read someone the moment I come in contact with them.  I can see their heart, and I’m able to decipher between good intentions and bad intentions as well as different emotions.  I can’t read anyone’s thoughts per say, but I can generally get a pretty clear idea.  But with you,” She seemed to take on a mystified tone, “it’s different.  I can see some decision but everything is clouded over; there is so much indecision yet decision.  I’ve never had to work this hard to read someone before.”  She nodded as if saying it out loud made it truer somehow.

 

“I’m sorry.”  I didn’t know what else to say to that.  It’s probably best she couldn’t read me.  It was hard enough trying to swallow the idea of my predetermined destiny.  I didn’t need the extra stress of guarding myself around Tarren too.  She laughed at my apology and took my hand in hers as we entered a building.

 

“Don’t be.”  She chanted softly. 

 

Tarren dropped me at my room for the night.  I was exhausted.  My head reeled with the information I’d received earlier.  I thought it was going to explode, and amazingly enough I still had questions.  At this point though, I really didn’t care if they were answered or not.  I just wanted to wake up and realize this was all a bad dream.  I laughed darkly at the thought.  Yeah right.

 

I was here in Eres waiting for someone to put a sword in my hand and set me on the front lines to defend their homes.  I scowled disgustedly; didn’t anyone care how I felt?  Didn’t anyone care what I thought?  Of course not.  They couldn’t get past the fact that I was another weapon to use against the enemy. 

 

Okay, I grimaced to myself, maybe that was taking it a bit too far.  As much as I wanted to believe it was true, I knew in my heart that it wasn’t.  It would have been easier to hate them for this but I just couldn’t convince myself.   Still, it did nothing to prevent the prickle of fear and depression from taking over.

 

I was afraid because I didn’t know what was going to happen to me.  What if I was made to be a part of this war?  Would I survive?  I didn’t even know what I was up against.  My last days of existence would be on this wretched land with people I didn’t even know.

 

  My depression grew by the second as I thought of home.  I wondered what my family was doing right this second.  They probably figured out I wasn’t in the attic by now.  I speculated the many ways my mother would freak out about my absence.  She would probably call a neighborhood search, and bother the police every hour wondering if they found any new information.  I could see posters plastered to every surface known to man. 

 

Tears leaked from the corners of my eyes as I lay in bed staring at the ceiling.  Guilt and a miserable sadness strangled my heart.  I rolled over on my side and closed my eyes with the ever slim hope of waking up to the attic again.

 

 

I woke up to muffled voices outside my door, but I didn’t bother opening my eyes.  I didn’t feel much like doing anything else but lay in bed.  My body felt rested but emotionally I was shot.  I still wasn’t fully coherent enough to realize the door had opened.  The soft chinking sound of a tray on the table next to the bed tipped me off.  I didn’t move until I heard the door close softly a second later. 

 

I felt around for the edge of the blanket resting on my shoulder and yanked it over my head submerging myself in darkness.  I shifted so that my back was to the door and waited to fall back into unconsciousness eagerly.  I knew if I stayed awake too long, reality would soon kick me in the gut.  I blissfully plunged into my own dream world minutes later, full of normal everyday things that I had taken for granted so many times before. 

 

 

This pattern seemed to repeat unceremoniously for what seemed like weeks (in actuality it was probably just a few days), only allowing a brief conscious state to steal bits of food off of the tray that was always next to the bed – a mere necessity.  I knew I was being pathetic, but I just couldn’t get it together.  It felt as if my body just shut down on me, and the depressed stupor I was submerged in was like shrink wrap. 

 

It clung to every inch of my body restricting my movement, restricting my breath, and even my thoughts.  I was growing considerably weaker by the second to resisting it.  Somewhere in the back of my mind I even questioned why I was resisting.  Wasn’t it easier this way?

 

Something cold touched my forehead.  I thought I was imagining it until I heard a scuffling noise somewhere outside the room along with a rash of protests.  A door slammed open and I heard a musical hiss close to my head.

 

“You shouldn’t be in here.”  The musical voice instructed to the intruder.

 

“I can’t believe this.”  The intruder said, ignoring the warning.

 

“I told you she was sick.”  The musical voice said in a matter of fact tone. 

 

“Sick?” The intruder asked incredulously. “It’s more like being childish, if you ask me.  She isn’t sick; she’s just feeling sorry for herself!”  I tried to pull myself out of the lethargic state I was so accustomed to, but to no avail.

 

“She isn’t sick physically shadow slayer,” The melodic voice belonged to Tarren.  I was starting to remember now.  The intruder snorted sarcastically at the explanation.  Then something happened.  It took me a minute to put together what was going on.  I heard Tarrens’ loud protest, and then felt myself being thrown over the intruders shoulder.  I managed to open my bleary eyes, mainly due to the jostling, but I couldn’t see where we were heading. 

 

“Where are you taking her!!?”  I heard Tarren scream somewhere down the hall.  I felt a low rumbling resonate from somewhere inside the intruders chest.  Was he chuckling??

 

“To give her a reality check.”  He muttered under his breath.  That didn’t sound promising.  He was still chuckling to himself.  Wait.  I recognize that voice.

 

“Ennissyen put me down.”  I managed to protest weakly, still trying to shake off the remnants of my lethargy.

 

It was no use.  He didn’t even acknowledge the fact that I spoke to him.  We seemed to walk for a while until finally he kicked open a door and we were outside.  He walked a few paces and stopped.  Abruptly, He swung me from his shoulders with ease until he had me in both his arms.  Then, to my horror, he threw me. 

 

I sailed through the air and crashed into something cold and wet with a loud splash.  It was a water trough.  I wheezed and spluttered unattractively as water burned my lungs.  It did the job, somewhat.  The shrink wrap feeling dissolved instantly.  I was wide awake.

 

“What…was…that…for?”  I managed to splutter painfully between coughs as I gracefully rolled out of the trough onto the ground.

 

“A reality check.”  Ennissyen stated with his arms crossed over his chest.  Right.  I guess I had that one coming. 

 

“Thanks.”  I managed to mutter.  I stood up slowly, fully aware of the slight tilt to everything in my vision.  I should have made myself eat more, I was way too weak.

 

“Thanks?”  He balked.  It seemed that angered him somehow, although I couldn’t quite figure out why. “Is that all you have to say?”

 

“What do you want me to say?”  I shrugged weakly.  Something burned deep in his eyes.

 

“I just threw you into a water trough.”  He said it so casually that it sounded like these things happened everyday.  It looked like he was waiting for something.  Was I supposed to say I’m sorry?

 

“I suppose I deserved it.”  Close enough. 

 

“Deserv...what?”  It was clear that an apology was definitely not what he was looking for.  “Are you kidding me?” 

 

It was a rhetorical question obviously, but I shook my head no anyway, confusion written all over my face.  That seemed to irritate him further. 

 

We stared at each other for a few minutes.  I had placed my hand on the side of the trough to keep my swaying balance steady.  I stared into his eyes, and something lit on fire deep inside them. 

 

I don’t know when it happened but Ennissyen closed the gap between us in an instant.  His arm threaded around my waist crushing me to his body while his other hand laced itself in my hair.  The contact sent invisible tingly sparks erupting over my skin.  Before I had a chance to blink, or breath for that matter, his mouth was on mine, and the sparks converged into one big explosion.  His soft supple lips crushed against mine urgently.  It felt like I was glowing.  By all rights, I felt like I should have been able to light up a Christmas tree with just the touch of a finger.  I was stunned for a second by the feeling, then realization struck me. 

 

Oh my god, he’s kissing me. 

 

It was a second too late; my body was already involuntarily responding to his.  I could feel muscles ripple over every inch of my body, the soft pressure of his hand at the small of my back, the desperate tug on my hair as he claimed my lips with his own.  I sensed a gentle need in his kiss behind the urgency.  The feeling tugged softly at something inside me.  I could feel my body saying yes, but for some idiotic reason my head was screaming no.  My head and body battled for a split second and my head won.

 

I went rigid under his assault.  Fighting the pleasurable feeling with great effort, my hands found their way up to his chest and with as much strength as I was capable, began to push.  He felt my resistance and released me.  I lifted myself up to my fullest height, raising my chin a fraction of an inch.  I sucked in a sharp breath and plowed him square in the jaw with my fist.  I growled with fury as I stalked back into the building. 

 

I heard him chuckle and then groan as I passed him.  Serves him right!  First he throws me into a water trough, and then he kisses me?  I touched my finger to my lips, reluctantly remembering how I felt against his body.  I shook the thought out of my head.  Stupid Arie.  I can’t get involved.  I can’t get involved with him.  I don’t even know him!  Ugh!  What was I doing to myself?  Whatever it was, I knew it wasn’t good.  Stupid stupid stupid!

 

I managed to find my way back to my room slowly, and found Tarren waiting for me.  Her eyes widened as she took in my appearance.  She pointed, about to ask but I beat her too it.

 

“My reality check.”  I retorted sourly.  She seemed to regard me for a long moment, and then suppressing a smile, went to the armoire across the room.

 

“What?”  I asked skeptically watching her pull out another dress.

 

“It’s nothing.  I’m glad you’re feeling better.”  She stated, trying to change the topic. 

 

I knew she was attempting to read me.  Evidently she saw something there that she liked but wasn’t going to tell.  That’s fine, if she wasn’t going to tell then neither was I.  Childish of course, but it made me feel better nonetheless. 

 

I took the dress she handed me, and changed out of my wet clothes while she disappeared to find some food.  She returned minutes later and sat silently until I finished eating.  When I was done, she took the tray and set it aside.  She moved to sit next to me with a troubled expression.  She took my hands in hers and I looked at her expectantly.

 

“We received word from Elen.”  She started.  “She finally made arrangements with the Council for a meeting place with the Vala to discuss strategy.” Uh-oh.

 

“Strategy?” I asked, trying to keep my voice calm. 

 

I guess I sort of suspected that I would have to leave this place at some point.  With everything that’s happened so far I didn’t even get to check out the city, and it suddenly felt like my days were numbered.  Why did it have to be so soon? 

 

“Basically it’s a meeting to make sure everyone is on the same page, and if anyone has any new information about our enemy, then they can share it with the group.”  Great.  I love planning battle strategies. “Elen has instructed us to depart Awsta in five days.  One of the Chosen will rendezvous here with us, and then we will make the trip together.” 

 

“I get to meet someone else like me?”  I asked surprised.  Up until now, I felt like I was alone, isolated.  It might do some good to meet someone else of my…kind.

 

“Sort of.”  My face fell slightly.  “He is one of the chosen, but not a Vala.  He is a Valas’…protector.”  She struggled with the last word.  That confused me slightly.

 

“Protector?”  I thought about it for a minute, and a light bulb lit up in my head.  “Oh like a body guard.”  She considered the term and then nodded her head in approval.

 

“Yes, like a body guard.”  She smiled and changed the topic. “The visitor should arrive tomorrow.  I was thinking, since you haven’t seen much of Awsta yet and we have another visitor arriving shortly, we could spend the day in the city.”  I perked up immediately at the offered plan.

 

“Yes!”  I exclaimed with pleasure.  “I would love to see the city.  I’ve been stuck in this room for way too long.  A bit of fresh air would be wonderful.”

 

“Then it’s settled.”  Tarren stood up and walked to the door.  She hesitated a moment and turned to look at me again with guarded eyes.  “You should enjoy the few days of peace we have left.  Once we start our journey to the meeting, it won’t be as comfortable.  I should tell you now, so that you are prepared, there’s training I must teach you before we get to the secret place.  Everyone at the meeting will have a considerable advantage over you in experience, and they might try to take advantage of that if you aren’t careful.”  I thought about it for a moment and then nodded.

 

She walked out the door, and I sat silently on my bed for a while contemplating what sort of training I would undergo.  I pushed it from my mind.  If I didn’t have to worry about it now then I wouldn’t.  I fully intended to take Tarrens’ words to heart and enjoy the few remaining days left and just relax.