Tags:
fantasy,
love,
clash,
princes,
witches,
spells,
magic,
seduction,
secret plans,
royalty,
owls,
destructive
Haha where do I start.
Well I basically got the idea for this story from the Video
"The white one is evil" By Elliot Minor.
Elliot Minor is a 5 piece band from England who's music genre is like Rock/Classical.
They are really good. If you want to check them out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpo7A5xUNmM that the video in question.
This is their myspace if you want to have a look.
www.myspace.com/elliotminor
Please check them out because they are totally under-rated.
Anyway... my main character Alexander is based around Alex Davies who is one of the main singers in Elliot minor. At the time I confess I had the biggggggggest crush on him. I wrote this before and after I met him after one of his gigs. He's gorgeous haha. So I thought I'd upload this and see what you guys thought. I'd been really proud of it and showed my friend it and he had not gave me a very positive review. He told me my characters were not very well developed and like my grammar etc was terrible lol. I was like oh well.
So yeah... please let me know what you think. I fell in love with my characters and I really thought this was a good story but I suppose one mans treasure is another mans trash. Anyway please give it a read and let me know what you think... Im going to upload all the chapters now.
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Submitted: May 22, 2008
Reads: 24
Comments: 1
Likes: 1
The Watcher swept through the cramped and unchanged alleys to make his way to the small house of O’Hare.
He burst into the house in such a fashion that the maid ran off in fright. The untidy O’Hare was sitting in his oddly placed lounge chair with his feet up. Gin in one hand. Mince pie in the other.
“Good God man! What’s wrong?” O’Hare shouted in fright as the Watcher entered the front room.
“I come on a matter of great urgency.” He said.
“Go on…”
“ As you know. It is close to day 6 of the week that was given to Miss Isabella. It is most of the way through the week and Alexander is still alive.”
“Yes. So?”
“I Do not believe she will carry out his death O’Hare…”
Mr O’Hare got up and stood beside the fireplace.
“I Believe she has developed strong feelings for the boy.”
O’Hare seemed to tense up.
“I Have often seen them kissing…”
Mr O’Hare cut him off mid sentence.
“People often kiss. She is simply trying to gain his trust so that killing him is that much easier. She would NEVER disobey me. She knows the consequences if she does.”
“ And you know the consequences for yourself if she does.” The watcher said sharply.
“Yes…. Does the king know yet.”
“Yes. I told him before I came here. I came to tell you that you will be picked up later today around 2pm to be taken to the forest. It’s a long journey so we must leave early if we wish to arrive on the last day. If Miss Isabella has not disposed of Alexander… well… lets just wait and see.”
O’Hare gulped back his worry.
“Oh and O’Hare. King Fredrick says don’t even think about running away , because he WILL find you. See you at 2pm.”
The Watcher left. His coat billowing in the wind - the little maid came out and quickly shut the wide open door.
Mr O’Hare stood motionless for a few minutes before dropping his glass of gin on the floor. It shattered into many pieces. He still stood still.
The little maid came up to him.
“Master! Master! What’s wrong.” she said in panic.
“ Oh Caroline. I Fear.. I am a dead man.”
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Comments:
Haha ! I loved O'Hare's last line at the end of this chapter...Alright ! Now the plot is brimming with melodrama , romance , slight cheesiness , some sort of bitter flavor , and an apparent hint to future drops of human blood . I'm not making sense maybe , but whatevs ! I'm proving the point . I think .
Posted: May 22, 2008
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