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The White One Is Evil

Novel By: WhatIsInAName
Fantasy


Haha where do I start.
Well I basically got the idea for this story from the Video
"The white one is evil" By Elliot Minor.

Elliot Minor is a 5 piece band from England who's music genre is like Rock/Classical.
They are really good. If you want to check them out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpo7A5xUNmM that the video in question.

This is their myspace if you want to have a look.

www.myspace.com/elliotminor

Please check them out because they are totally under-rated.

Anyway... my main character Alexander is based around Alex Davies who is one of the main singers in Elliot minor. At the time I confess I had the biggggggggest crush on him. I wrote this before and after I met him after one of his gigs. He's gorgeous haha. So I thought I'd upload this and see what you guys thought. I'd been really proud of it and showed my friend it and he had not gave me a very positive review. He told me my characters were not very well developed and like my grammar etc was terrible lol. I was like oh well.
So yeah... please let me know what you think. I fell in love with my characters and I really thought this was a good story but I suppose one mans treasure is another mans trash. Anyway please give it a read and let me know what you think... Im going to upload all the chapters now. View table of contents...

Chapters:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22

Submitted: May 22, 2008    Reads: 24    Comments: 1    Likes: 1   


Alexander woke early and grabbed some apples from a nearby tree before having a wash in the bank beside him. The sky was a light blue but the surrounding silhouettes of trees seemed still black in colour. The water from the bank was cold and Alexander shivered as he dressed.  He wandered around lonely as usual. He decided he would practice his archery to make Luna proud. He found his arrows and his bow and began using the trees across the bank as target practice. He missed a few trees and then got one right in the middle.
“ Yes!” he cried. “ Let’s see if I can do that again.”

He tried again this time really focussing on the trees. This arrow went much further than the other one did. He was sure he heard it crack into something. He then heard an almighty scream. He panicked and forgetting everything Luna had said to him and only fearing what he had hit he swam quickly across the bank and into the forest he had been warned so often about.

He followed the cries to find a young woman who had been standing beside a tree lying on the ground with an arrowhead an inch into her leg.
He was both shocked and amazed. He ran towards her. She seemed to be in quite a bit of pain.
“ Is this your arrow?” She said through gritted teeth.
“ I’m afraid it is madam. I’m so very sorry. Luna always told me there was no one in the forest.. I would never have been firing them into here had I known. What’s your name?”
“ Its.. Isabella.” she said “ and you?”
“ Alexander.”
“ Alexander!?” she asked.
“ Yes… why?”
“ Oh.. No reason…. Can you get this out my leg please.” she said very quickly trying to change the subject.
“ Of course.” He said.

He studied her leg. It had went into her thigh and he was trying very hard to be gentle and gallant. She was watching him.

“Um.. This will hurt a little when I pull it out. I don’t believe it has struck a bone. However, It will probably just be a small scar.”

He pulled it out as quickly as he could and then after washing the wound with some water he took the string from his bow and sewed up her leg wound.

“ You are very resourceful, aren’t you.” Isabella said cautiously.
“ I find that living here you have to be.” He smiled.
She felt something like guilt and unsurely she gave him a slight smile. He seemed quite friendly and nice to her and yet here she was-- the girl who would lead to his untimely death.

“ Can you walk?”
“ I’m not sure..”
“ I’ll carry you then.” He said and picked her up quite easily in his arms. He took her slowly across the bank and then laid her down on his bed.
“ You may sleep here till you are better. I get so little company, I’m unsure of whether or not my manners are bad.”
“ No your manners are fine. Are there no other people here?”
“ I’m afraid its just me and Luna.”
“ Luna?”
“ My friend the owl.”

Isabella gave him a funny look which he ignored.
“ Can I ask why you were walking around that forest in the first place?” said Alexander.
“ I.. got separated from my family. I have been walking for a day or two. I’m not sure where anyone is.”
“ Well when you are better my friend Luna will lead you home.”
“ You will not?”
“ No I’m afraid I cant leave.”
“ Why not?”
“ it’s a long story.”
“ I see.”


Alexander sat down close beside her. Isabella saw her chance to make her move. To begin to control him she would have to have some sort of contact with him. Surely?
She stared at him for a moment before gently touching his hand.
He looked at her in confusion for a second and then looked away.
“ You must be hungry, I think ill go out and get us some food.” He said and quickly shut the door.
She felt strange. How had this not worked? Perhaps she didn’t have the powers that everyone was so sure that she did have. Either way this was going to be more difficult than she thought.


1

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Comments:

It's a good kind of head spinning (called hunger!) This is wayyy fast paced compared to others. Usually they just fill in the blanks with random crap that the reader doesn't even wanna hear about and it takes centuries for the storyline to unfold ! And how could your friend not like it ? LIEEEEESSSSSS !!!!!!!

*ahem*

Alright , now we jump farther into the boiling pot of thickening plot...It tastes unique..With a dash of slight confusion here and there , and a view of Alex's innocence . AH ! So Isabell doesn't know how to use her powers..? Hrmm...This boiling plot is getting thicker...And tastier !!! Whooo! Cheesiness !! (wait...I've confused myself now ! )

Posted: May 22, 2008

Author Comment:

Haha :D

^-^



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