Unsheathing ancient sword
it sang, Shiiiing!
and sliced a bursting seam of black cloud
afraid if the rain pours too hard
it would leave not even a trace
If it were me, what would I do?
I’d never come close to
plumbing my depths
I’d admire the earned sheath
holding the Shiiiing
more so the steady hand, holding sheath
I’d admire the secure rumble
roaring up the jeweled arm
holding the Shiiiing
I’d lay the ancient steel
in catkins of puss willow
charmingly, as
ancient asian granny rocks
hard candy in her wrinkled cheek.
Shiiiing.
You’ll never come close to
plumbing my depths even if
holding the Shiiiing
Well, Classy Peach, I had to get out my dictionary, as vocabulary is not one of my best, but my horizons are expanding....lol!! Help me understand this poem. Help me see where this took you. Just being honest, but sometimes I don't understand certain poems, but other times, it's very clear. The pride that stands in the way of asking is hard at times, but I don't care ....I'm asking.
Posted: Jun 17, 2008
I love it when it pours Peach;) and if the rain pours too hard, I bathe in it;) With all the fun you have with your tale spinning, I can't help but get pulled in to your world of imagination;) Loved it,
This is what I saw as I read your poem:
I saw a child like version of you, finding a sword sort of Peter Pan like, and slicing the black cloud only to release a torrent of rain,
then playing with the sword some more and admiring it so much you find the desire to hide it(in the catkins of puss willow...then in the rocks where it doesn't hide well...
Declairing to no one in particular that you are "Never to be conquered even if you hold the shiiiing!" my words interpretation of yours, (yours are better but I'm on a role)
I could see this to some kind of Fantasia like ballad, seriously maybe (probably) I'm way off your mark, but I like the way I read your words ;)
Wow, didn't know that much would come out.
I liked it;)
~rain
Posted: Jun 18, 2008
Hey Classy, do drop me a line when you post a new poem. To think that I’ve been missing this gem for so many days! Here I am to unsheath my own thoughts on this beauty….
It’s funny, but this poem did not talk to me erotically (even though I have a reeeally dirty mind!). Somehow, it sounded like a session with a shrink (maybe I need one?). The ancient sword represented the subconscious to me, which had long been repressed. Hence the Shiiing, the Voila, the Eureka when one decided to face that which one had been avoiding for long. It, of course, sliced through the layers of escapism that the mind had devised, initially bringing back horrid experiences. Naturally, one is afraid to be swept off in the torrent, worrying about losing control.
And so, one is afraid of probing too deep. It’s generally easier to just let it be.
At the same time, one would feel happy to be able to unearth the subconscious, to face the facts, to regain control.
What a feeling of security to be able to take out each experience, examine it objectively, deal with it as one ought to, and gain untold emotional wealth out of it!
One would like to soothe the mind, after dissecting the past and burying it once and for all.
At the same time, the writer seems ambivalent about her wish to probe the subconscious – she probably does not want it buried forever; she wants the ghosts of memories to visit her from time to time so that she can ‘live’ in those moments at her own pace, on her own terms. At times.
Is she daring the shrink to unravel her subconscious? She thinks that her memories go so deep that he will not succeed, despite possessing special skill in that regard.
By now you must be laughing your head off by my crazy interpretation. But this is what flashed into my mind when I read this poem. Needless to say, it’s a great poem. I would have enjoyed the lines to be a bit longer, more detailed, lingering further on each point. But then, we write the way which makes us feel good about it, so there it is – I’m sure you had a ball!
Posted: Jun 20, 2008
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