The young man took a bite out of his hot dog before finally speaking up to the person sitting across from him. “OK, Pawpaw, you have got to tell me exactly how you wound up in this situation. Mom still can’t tell the story right.”

            Across from him, the older man chewed on his own hot dog as he regarded his grandson with a twinkle in his eye. His grandson had been out of town when the incident occurred and his mother had not told him about it for fear of upsetting him. The young man had been angry at his mother for days about that afterwards. Months had passed and he had gotten over his anger. Now seemed as good of a time to tell the story as any. “All right. You were down in Texas, so you didn’t get to hear the tale. You know that your grandmother and I have been helping to raise money for the senior citizens center across town. Well, that day we went with other fundraisers to inspect the site. When we were done, everyone started walking back to the parking lot. I had gotten pretty hot, so I was a little slower than the others, and they got pretty far ahead of me.

            “You haven’t been there, so you don’t know that the parking lot was on a slight hill. Well, one of the women had parked her Lincoln in the parking lot on that hill. I guess that the car was tired of sitting still and wanted to get on with its journey. It started rolling down the hill by itself.”

            The old man took another bite of his hotdog and chewed. He noticed that his grandson had stopped eating his. He took his time, making sure to chew his food well before swallowing and continuing his story. “Well, I was just walking along, kinda lost in thought. I never saw that car rolling at me. The other group did, though. They started yelling ‘Joe! Get out of the way! Look out!’ Of course, my hearing aid was turned down because I was tired of listening to your grandmother, so I did hear a word they were yelling. They kept waving their arms and pointing. It finally caught my attention. I stood there looking at them as they yelled and pointed. I finally turned to see what they were pointing at. That’s when the car hit me.”

            The young man sat there astounded. His grandfather was telling this story like it was no big deal. “Yep, I woke up, ate breakfast, went out to get the mail, got run over by a parked car, had a good supper. How was your day?” How could he be so calm?

            “Well, when the car hit me,” he continued, “it broke my left hip. I rolled up on the hood and then bounced off of the windshield. I hit the ground pretty hard. I looked up and saw the rear wheel running over my right leg. I remember that the wheel was actually lifting up as it rolled over my leg. I thought ‘Now wait a minute. That car weighs 3,000 pounds. It should have shattered my leg.’ Then I heard a crack and the wheel went down and I thought ‘Yep. There it went.’ Then I passed out. When I woke up, there were all these old people looking down at me.”

            “Pawpaw, you’re over 70. What are you talking about ‘old people?”

            The old man laughed. “I know I’m over 70. So you can imagine what it looked like when I saw all these old people looking down at me! One of them asked ‘Is he dead?’ I said, ‘No I’m not dead. I’m in too much pain to be dead!’ Then I passed out again.” He finished off the last of his hotdog before completing his tale. “When I came around in the emergency room, your grandmother was having a fit. My younger brother was about to cry. I couldn’t take all of the fuss. I turned to the nurse next to me and said ‘I don’t know what they are worried about. I’m faking this whole thing. I just like the gowns y’all use here. They have a nice breeze through them.’ The nurse laughed and everyone calmed down a little.

            “The doctors told me that I had a broken left hip and a shattered right leg. They said there would have to be surgeries, rod, reconstructions. Thank goodness this was someone else’s fault. I didn’t have to pay for anything! Anyways, they told me I probably wouldn’t be walking again.”

            The young man shook his head in amazement. He finished off his hotdog quickly and smiled. “Never a dull moment around you, Pawpaw.”

            “Sometimes I wish there were. Come on. I’ll play you at another game of pool.” The old man used his cane as he walked out of the cafeteria. He had already beaten his college-age grandson at two games of pool. One more wouldn’t hurt. No Lincoln can keep me off my feet he thought as his grandson racked them up.