It was late when I arrived home from work, money was tight and I needed the over-time. Rhonda had taken a part-time job too, we both knew a baby would eat into our savings but we felt it was time. What we didn't know was that how something so small could shit so much, it seemed our money was used keeping the baby's ass clean.
The house was dark when I pulled into the drive, Rhonda had taken the baby to her sisters and said she'd probably stay the night, she could have at least left a light on inside, "hey you, I'm an empty house, why don't you come ransack me." I went in the house, cracked a beer and relaxed with the TV on. Four beers later my head was pounding so I took a couple of painkillers, grabbed another beer and went back to the TV. Halfway through the movie I went upstairs for a dump.
As I left the bathroom I heard someone shuffling around downstairs, someone or something. I sneaked down the stairs avoiding the second last step, the creaky one, and stopped and listened. I could hear the intruder in the kitchen so I went for the cupboard and pulled the 9 iron out of my golf bag.
When I entered the living room there was a strange man standing looking at me, he was a big ugly mother.
"Oh hi, your still up, I thought you'd be in bed by now." he said.
"Don't you move fucker, or I'll sink this 9 iron in your socket," I said to him.
"What are you talking about baby, why don't you put the golf club down and stop messing around." he said.
"Shut the fuck up, I ain't messing around shit, I'm phoning the police." I said going for the phone.
"Cut the crap and put the phone down Mr Broadway Box Office." stepping forward coming for me.
I noticed he had something in his hand. I stepped forward and brought the club down on top of his head, devastating his skull. He dropped down on his knees and fell toward the floor. I picked up the phone and asked for the police telling them there was an intruder in my house and that I'd killed him, and then I heard the baby's cries coming from the room. I looked at the body and saw it was a baby's bottle in his hand. I slowly walked over to him and turned him over and Rhonda's dead eyes stared back at me.