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Well, this was a flash piece I wrote last night. It was quick writing and I had no idea where I was going until I got there so I hope it works. View table of contents...

 

Submitted: Aug 11, 2008    Reads: 108    Comments: 9    Likes: 4   


The man I loved, came to me unexpectedly. He wore his heart on his sleeve from the very first day that I met him. I remember it well, it was at the doctors surgery, the one place you daren‘t look at the person next to you for fear of what you might catch! I ignored his stare as I moved across the room to reach the last empty seat, the seat that just so happened to be next to him. I turned my head away, focusing my attention to the posters cast along the wall and when he spoke, I could hear the smile in his voice but I still didn’t look at him.

He made such an effort that in the end I couldn’t help but look andthat’s when I noticed just how charming hewas with his dark hair and blue eyes. The trouble then was thatI couldn’t look away! I hadn’t intended it to happen as it did, I never would have planned such a thing!

I wasn’t sure forwhat reason he wasat the doctors for but he managed convinced me, “It’s only a cold!” Of course, when I came down with the flu I knew better of it. After a delayed few weeks in recovery I met him along the green in the park. He was a gentle man. His hand felt so lovely in mine, such smooth and silky skin! Oh, how I loved him!

“I thought dinner was at six tonight?”

Harry’s voice came thick and fast, interrupting my train of thought. But that tone didn’t strike a cord with me anymore, not like it used to. His face looked bitter, he frowned with disapproval and I had to turnto hide my smirk, the man looked like a caricature of him self when he got angry like that!

Harry expected things to happen like magic, the dinner, the washing, the kids! “The dinner,” I told him “is going to be late because our son Jacob, turned the gas off again!” I looked back at him, now able to control myself and watched him turn his head toward the open door of the kitchen.

“Jacob?” he called for him with that same tone that he’d used on me. I casually lent against the kitchen side, whipping my hands on my piny.

Our son Jacob, he was turning six next week. He was a troubled kid at home, as much as we’re troubled adults. He had a curiosity for buttons, switches, knobs and such, and couldn’t leave them alone even if he’d wanted to. Harry hated that about him and punished him most nights.

Jacob entered the kitchen in his little grey school shorts and white shirt, adorable I thought though you couldn’t see his shoes! Jacob, was also into mud and creepy crawlies. He’d been playing alone in the back garden and his hands and legs were masked with dirt!

He stood in front of Harry, who was sat at the table. Harry turned his chair around to see him better and they looked at one another, one in fear the other disappointment.

“What did I tell you yesterday that you’ve seemed to have forgotten?”

Jacob didn’t answer, only shook his head and waited it out.

“Do you need me to remind you again about touching the over?”

I watched Harry - this changed man that I once loved, the man threatening our child and I knew in my heart it was time. Letting him continue I quietly moved to the oven to check the leg of lamb. It was perfectly cooked, as I’d expected. I cut the meat as fast as I could without making any noise and laid it out on the dinner plate with the vegetables and trickled the gravy over the meat, just as he liked it.

I turned and saw him point his finer at Jacob. I placed the plate down on the table in front of him and moved away before he could catch my eye.

“What’s that?” he gestured at the dinner “Can‘t you see I‘m busy with the kid?”

I smiled softly and then looked at Jacob, “Run along now and let your father eat” I told him.

Harry turned in his seat and lent back looking at me with a turned up lip, he was angry with me for doing that. He waited for me to react but got nothing, instead I turned back to the lamb and continued to cut it until it was done. When I heard his knife scrapped into the plate, I knew I’d managed to fool him, just enough for me to excuse myself from the kitchen.

I headed for Jacob’s room and there I saw him holding his case at the door. I paused and looked him up and down. For the first time in a long time I saw him smile, although doused with fear he looked happy!

“Come on now,” I whispered hastily “quickly, I will meet you at the front door.” I watched him nod and shuffle the heavy case, the bottom corner dragging along the floor.

I went to the main bedroom and pulled my case from under the bed. Harry wouldn’t notice such a thing like that, he only ever used the room to sleep in, which was never a problem as far as I was concerned! He was always ignorant to my needs, he usually spent his free time in the garage, working on car engine parts. He was lazy otherwise, and never paid any attention to me.

I stood and lifted the suitcase off of the floor and began to carry it out. I turned at the door and a moment of sadness washed over me. Not for him, but the familiarity of my home. With a sigh, I walked on toward the front of the house, edging past the door to the kitchen that still stood open. I caught a glimpse of him andI knewit was to late to turn back now, and with the last few steps I began to run!

Freedom was in the shape of someone else! Someone who waited for me in a getaway car out front. As I got closer I saw them, Jacob in the back and him in the front. The one I’d met that day in the Doctors surgery.

“At your service, beautiful!” he said peering out of the car window and winking at me.

I smiled nervously and walked around the car to place my suitcase on the back next to Jacob. “Alright sweetie?” I asked him and he nodded eagerly. Then I took a deep breath “Ok!” I gathered myself before moving to the front seat next to the drivers.

“Did it work?” he asked me bravely.

I paused, not sure how to say the words. I looked behind me at Jacob who was staring back at the house andthen Ilooked back at him, “he was on the kitchen floor, I’m sure it worked!” I said under my breath and looked ahead proudly as he started the engine.

“Good, let’s get out of here before anyone see‘s us!”

And we left, me, my new love and my son, leaving my good for nothing husband on the kitchen floor, poisoned with a touch of arsenic!


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Comments:

Oh my word that's a bit callous dear he must have been a real bugger.
Oh well new life, new hope new aspirations "go for it girl" 8/10

Posted: Aug 11, 2008

Author Comment:

Ha, well it's my usual theme but yep, callous indeed! I guess I wanted to leave the reasons why up to the reader, i made a few hints into abuse but who knows? that's why I love flash pieces! Thanks for reading Bufferdude, appreciate it! ;) ~ Nixie

I love it:) And no I am not in the mood to kill my husband. He has actually been very good lately:) This was a surprise!

Posted: Aug 11, 2008

Author Comment:

LOL Nita, you crack me up! Ha! This was a bit of a surprise for myself too, it's my first really mean story I think. thanks for reading! :) ~ Nixie

Bravo. Excellent job my friend. I could really feel what the character was going through. This story really kept me wanting to read more. And was glad to see that the husband got what he deserved. I love it. :)

Posted: Aug 13, 2008

Author Comment:

Ha! I'm glad you thought so, I was starting to feel a bit mean. :) Thank you for always reading Michael, very happy to know you enjoyed it. ~ Nixie

Nice work didn't turn out the way I thought but hey... Please remind me not to get on your bad side...
Loved it! Very tasteful!

Posted: Aug 13, 2008

Author Comment:

I had planned a different ending but it didn't work. Maybe one day I will add a second possible ending and see how that goes down? Oh and me, a bad side? Ha, never! Haha! ;) Thanks Mel! ~ Nixie

Wow, nice ending, didn't see it coming. That was a great little story and wonderfully woven. Thanks for sharing, Ted :)

Posted: Aug 13, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh thank you, Ted! That is a very sweet comment, I'm glad you liked it and I'm all smiles! ~ Nixie

oh nixie what great writing with an evil streak, i loved it. i think he did get what he deserved. lol.
snow

Posted: Aug 14, 2008

Author Comment:

Lol, Snow, I was starting to wonder if this made me look like a meany! I think he got what he deserved too... though I guess I could of made it longer and added a few more examples of him being a beast? Ah well, chuffed as ever, thank you Snow! ~ Nixie

of course I must dare you to send this to a womens magazine. I have loads of addresses if you want them. you certainly have a nice touch for this type of writing. very impressive.

Posted: Aug 17, 2008

Author Comment:

Of course I'm interested! Can you message me on MS? Thanks for your praise, its a HUGE encouragement! ~ Nixie

I must say, that I couldn't stop reading this, right from the start-the suspense, and unexpected ending were crazy :O...I agree with Gazzavis....u could write for a magazine...get your stories published Nix...they are impressive ;D
*Meg*

Posted: Aug 17, 2008

Author Comment:

Aww, sweet! Thank you, Meg you know I'm one happy gal to hear you liked it so much. I think I will give it a shot, what do I have to loose? ~ Nixie

very good! i like it. i just dont understand why she had to poison him. i mean, she could have just put in some sleeping medicine and made her getaway while he slept. considering how you described him as 'lazy' and 'ignorant' i doubt he would have followed... the descripion of the food made me hungry though..
*drools and stomach growls* anyhow, great job!

Posted: Aug 27, 2008

Author Comment:

ha, glad the imagery worked with the food. I was being brutal which isn't my usual but I'm playing with idea, some you win and some you lose. Killing off people in my stories is getting easier! Lol Thanks for reading, appreciate the comment too. ~ Nixie



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