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garrycroft



Booksie Address: http://www.booksie.com/garrycroft
Country: United Kingdom
Member Since: Sep 23, 2012

Featured Writing

garrycroft

"Rock Around The Clot"

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 14, 2014
A rock 'n' roll song about my dancing experiences.
Tags:dance, comedy, rock, roll, hopefully

garrycroft

Costabucks or Starcocks

by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 6, 2013
Conversation in coffee shop
Tags:humour, coffee, costa

garrycroft

QUESTIONABLE QUADRUPLETS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Oct 31, 2013
4 line verses with humorous intent.
Tags:comedy, intentions

garrycroft

COMEDY COUPLETS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Sep 7, 2013
Quick wits witty ditty
Tags:rhyme, comedy, jokes, hopefully

garrycroft

"COME AGAIN!"- ode to National Orgasm Day.

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Aug 4, 2013
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh orgasms are great!
Tags:ecstasy, climax, faking

garrycroft

TURN THE TV OFF...OR YOU'LL BE JEREMY KYLED!

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jun 8, 2013
Desperate measures are required sometimes to get us away...
Tags:humour, marijuana, kyle, jeremy, hopefully

garrycroft

A WALK DOWN SURREAL STREET

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: May 5, 2013
MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND MISHAPS ON MISINTERPRETATION MALL
Tags:shopping, comedy, hopefully

garrycroft

SIR CLIFF RICHARD KILLS FLOWERS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Apr 19, 2013
Inspired by a recent horticultural experiment.
Tags:humour, plants, cliff, black, sabbath, metal, heavy, richard, hopefully

garrycroft

RAMS A NAG.....by GRR FACTORY

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Apr 14, 2013
AN ARM SAG LANGUAGE COMEDY HOPEFULLY
Tags:language, comedy, hopefully, anagrams

garrycroft

DOWN WITH HOMOPHONIA (repeat)

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Mar 12, 2013
I've published this again so I can put it on my site(it...
Tags:fanny, peace, poet, grate, righting

garrycroft

SEX, WILLIES, BUSTERS AND BUMS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Feb 11, 2013
SEXY WOOLY BUM MUFF COMEDY
Tags:sex

garrycroft

" OOCHY COOCHY DOGGY RASCALS"

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 6, 2013
"GIVE THEM BEER, CHOCCY AND FRUIT PASTILLES OH HOW WE...
Tags:dogs, comedy, pet, absurdity, owners

garrycroft

NORMAL SERVICE WILL NEVER BE RESUMED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

Short Story by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 6, 2013
A PROTEST AGAINST THOSE ROBBERS THE MEDIA GIANTS

garrycroft

I USED TO BE A BABY

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 21, 2012
I USED TO BE A BOY ALSO

garrycroft

ABSURDY TURDY MAN

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 7, 2012
CALL A SPADE A BLOODY SPADE WILL YOU!
Tags:words, modern, funny, phrases

garrycroft

MADRAS ITS BECAUSE I'M A LONDONER

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Nov 25, 2012
I DONT CURRY FAVOUR JUST LOVE CURRY FLAVOUR
Tags:food, silly, curry

Writing Portfolio

"Rock Around The Clot"

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 14, 2014
A rock 'n' roll song about my dancing experiences.

"SHED DOLLY QUAINT AUNTS, BEEF OR GUT, ANNE DOLED LUNG SIGN "

by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 30, 2013
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL MY FAN

Updated Carols for the Modern Age

by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 16, 2013
Alcoholly and then I wee. Christmas carols.

MANDELA

Article by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 12, 2013
Western leaders hypocrisy towards Mandela politics

Christmas Presents To Avoid.

Article by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 10, 2013
"Christmas time, misery toll and whine."

Costabucks or Starcocks

by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 6, 2013
Conversation in coffee shop

Bearing A Grudge Can Seriously Damage Your Health

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Nov 11, 2013
Comic intentions dealing with a grudge

QUESTIONABLE QUADRUPLETS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Oct 31, 2013
4 line verses with humorous intent.

IT'S NOT GRIM UP NORTH

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Oct 11, 2013
WE'RE QUITE CULTURED AND BRIGHT ACTUALLY...IF YOU DON'T...

"BAD MORNING DARLING"

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Sep 26, 2013
MORNING ROWS CAN BE SO DISCOMBOBULATING!

COMEDY COUPLETS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Sep 7, 2013
Quick wits witty ditty

"COME AGAIN!"- ode to National Orgasm Day.

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Aug 4, 2013
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh orgasms are great!

WONGA WONKERS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jul 29, 2013
THE CHURCH ATTACKS WONGA AND SUPPORTS CREDIT UNIONS

JOHNNY TILLOTSON HAS EATEN ALL MY ODES...a brief history of music.

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jul 22, 2013
Sir Gent peppers lawn-Lee Hart's club banned.

THE SUN IS THE CURE FOR THE SUMMERTIME BLUES

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jul 8, 2013
A LOOK AT THE BEST BRITISH SUMMER FOR MANY YEARS

MEAT EATER MAKES ME TEETER

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jun 16, 2013
MEAT EATERS VIEWS ON VEGETARIANS.

TURN THE TV OFF...OR YOU'LL BE JEREMY KYLED!

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jun 8, 2013
Desperate measures are required sometimes to get us away...

NO SENSOR HUMOUR IN MALLORCA

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: May 11, 2013
YOU'VE GOTTA LAUGH...HAVEN;T YOU...MAYBE NOT THEN

A WALK DOWN SURREAL STREET

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: May 5, 2013
MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND MISHAPS ON MISINTERPRETATION MALL

SIR CLIFF RICHARD KILLS FLOWERS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Apr 19, 2013
Inspired by a recent horticultural experiment.

RAMS A NAG.....by GRR FACTORY

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Apr 14, 2013
AN ARM SAG LANGUAGE COMEDY HOPEFULLY

SUSAN.....I NEED A BISCUIT (Live at the "Momentum" March 2013)

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Apr 1, 2013
LIVE PERFORMANCE OF A COMEDY POEM(to celebrate friend,...

BATH TIME BLUES

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Mar 27, 2013
SUPERFLUOUS FRIVOLITY

BEING FRANK (AN ODE TO THE POPE)

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Mar 15, 2013
POPE..pot pourri...POPE....IT'S ABOUT THE POPE

STUFF WORK!

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Mar 13, 2013
LIFE AFTER WORK

DOWN WITH HOMOPHONIA (repeat)

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Mar 12, 2013
I've published this again so I can put it on my site(it...

TOILET-A TISSUE ISSUE

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Mar 10, 2013
COMEDY TOILET NO SEX NO SWEARING

CHARITY BEGINS.....AT A CHARITY SHOP

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Feb 23, 2013
CLASS IN STITCHING...NO CHANCE OF ITCHING

LONG LIVE A COMEDY POETRY COLLECTIVE

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Feb 22, 2013
A BAND OF COMEDY POETS

SEX, WILLIES, BUSTERS AND BUMS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Feb 11, 2013
SEXY WOOLY BUM MUFF COMEDY

HUNGRY! I COULD EAT A HORSE(updated version)

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 17, 2013
HORSE MEAT IN HAM BURGERS

DISTURBED BIRD MAN

by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 13, 2013
WHAT BIRD'S NAMES REALLY MEAN

" OOCHY COOCHY DOGGY RASCALS"

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 6, 2013
"GIVE THEM BEER, CHOCCY AND FRUIT PASTILLES OH HOW WE...

NORMAL SERVICE WILL NEVER BE RESUMED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

Short Story by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 6, 2013
A PROTEST AGAINST THOSE ROBBERS THE MEDIA GIANTS

THANK YOU TO ALL MY FAN

by garrycroft
Posted: Jan 1, 2013
HAPPY NEW YEAR...

"BOOKSIE, BOOKSIE, I'LL MENTION YOUR NAME

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 30, 2012
BLATANT ADVERTISING OF A WASHED OUT POET!(Sociological...

WATER RAINS SUPREME

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 25, 2012
WATER FOR POWER, HEAT FOR CAULIFLOWER

AXIOMS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 25, 2012
FINE WORDS BUTTER NO PARSNIPS

I USED TO BE A BABY

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 21, 2012
I USED TO BE A BOY ALSO

"EXCUSE ME BUT COULD I STRIP YOUR WILLOW?"

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 14, 2012
A NIGHT OUT DANCING..TO BE READ IN A JAUNTY MANNER.

ABSURDY TURDY MAN

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Dec 7, 2012
CALL A SPADE A BLOODY SPADE WILL YOU!

MADRAS ITS BECAUSE I'M A LONDONER

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Nov 25, 2012
I DONT CURRY FAVOUR JUST LOVE CURRY FLAVOUR

WORDY GURDY MAN

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Nov 16, 2012
FOUR WORDS OF WISDOM

DONT FOLLOW MY LEADER

Poem by garrycroft
Posted: Oct 28, 2012
ROY HODGSON TRIES TO PICK A PRINCIPLED ENGLAND CAPTAIN

FROM ' DAIRYGATE ' TO SORE TESTICLE.

Short Story by garrycroft
Posted: Oct 12, 2012
KLASSIC KELTIC KERFUFFLES KANDIDLY KAPTURED



PLEASE TRY READING "SCREECH"....ALTERNATIVE VERSE...FOR THE INSANE OR WORSE!

CONTACT INDIESKREET ON..... www.indieskreet.co.uk.

 

 

I have decided to have a break from Booksie. This is because I feel there is only so far I can go with my style of poetry.  My "one string to my bow" has begun to bore me....haha.

I am concentrating on my live performances which are based on my poetry but also comedy sets and music.

My thanks to all who have supported me. 16 months ago I had never written anything. Now I perform up to three times a month and my priority is to develope my routines. On Booksie I wrote prolifically for over a year and was inspired and encouraged in equal measure by comments and other peoples' work. I have absolutely loved it.

Thanks to all the people mentioned below. My email is on this site. Goodbye for now.

 

I have read a great amount of funny and talented work on Booksie in that time. Unfortunately, except for a few exceptions, most have left for greener pastures. They have left an excellent legacy for us all to enjoy.

 

I RECOMMEND:  templefields

                           Elyen

                           Speed racer

                           Stormbird Throneshaker

                                Ben Hardstaff

                                Redskelf

                                Indie Skreet

                                Insane Membrane

                                Russ Teed

Regular contributors NOW:

                               PatriPoe

                           Desilu

                           Mike Stevens

                           Elton Camp

                           Ava Rosien

                           Mr Watson

                           Larry Jackson

 

 

THANKS to everybody who has supported me and given me confidence over the last 12 months…but particularly, Mike Stevens, Patri Poe, Desilu, Redskelf, Indie Skreet and Ben Hardstaff, Larry Jackson and Bob the Builder.

Finally the highpoint of the last 12 months was my involvement in “comedy poetry”.

 

http://www.booksie.com/comedy_poetry

 

SEE ME PERFORM LIVE :

 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaqh4AolGoopTPtMbwtAlNQ.

 

I now perform live on a regular basis and so far so good…haha., My writings are now geared to this in many ways.  My aim is to produce uplifting poetry which contains humour (hopefully!) to a varying degree. The live performances have made me think of comedy alot more. The link above allows you to judge yourself.

Contact me on croftgarry@gmail.com

 

 LONG LIVE A COMEDY POETRY COLLECTIVE

 

Comedy Poetry lasted only a while

Until people realised it wasn’t their style

Joining collective demanded some reins

Unlimited posting effecting our brains.

 

A collective it brings all shades of colour

To the genre of verse a touch of valour

Does not negate individual plight

Indeed it’s a funnel straight to your site.

 

A troupe of poets, like a musical band

Sum of strengths, not solo and bland

A good drummer’s better, understand

When other group members are lending a hand.

 

Imagine a poem as a two minute song

Extremely tuneful to sing along

Two weeks later,  got a bit stale

Fresh air needed to inhale.

 

Matters not how good you are

One can only go so far

Poetry we make is good for a laugh

To give it more status is just being daft.

 

In a selfish mood but not being soft

Better in collective than plain garry croft

Truth is I got one string to my bow

Others are needed, then there’s a show.

 

 

 

 

 

garrycroft has 31 Fans

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