Many times before did I stand at that window and look in, many times before did I stare at the solid, still body with in my view and many times I longed to touch him but I couldn’t. As the wind slashed and whipped my face and the rain pelted down and wiped my tears away, so my whole face was ridden by wetness and was hiding my sadness, I stood so solemn and cold as I gazed deeper and deeper into him. My body was urging me to open the window, creep down and lie beside him so when we woke up he would arise to me and feel complete and happy.
As my knees began to quake and the rest of my body shook erratically, I felt my body stumble to the ground and I was soon on my knees in the mud. I managed to make my way out the mud, but I had to see him, I had to get close to him, show my emotions for him.
My parents think it is wrong that I can like or even love someone with the same gender as me; they think it is repulsive whenever I mention his name; they seem to skip the topic and move on to something else.When I ask if he can stay over, or go to his house to they seem to stare me down, as if I embarrass them or insult them as I ask.They can't stop the way I feel, no one can because its my life and I can do whatever I want, but in their eyes I am wrecking it, because I have chosen to be a veil homosexual...their words not mine.But in my eyes he is the best thing to ever happen to me, he is the best thing since ever and I think I have become to love him.
He is sweet and kind, he is passionate and loving and I wouldn’t change him for a newer model or in fact anything in the world. The way his feathered brown hair flickers in the wind and his ocean blue eyes reflect in the sun makes me feel warm and fuzzy and proud to call him my boyfriend. Or when he towers over me at 5ft 6" he makes me feel safe and protected and when he holds me in his arms I know everything is fine, and the abuse I put up with is worth being with him.
The rain is slowly fading away and the wind is dying down, I sniff and cough in the cold autumn night. He said he would leave the window open so I could just climb through, he even cleared a space so I wouldn’t knock anything down, but knowing how clumsy I am I bet something does brake or fall anyway. As the window slides open with some creaks in the framework and some creaks in the bed because he had twisted his body round to face the wall. The window was quite low down and he lived in a bungalow so it was quite convenient seeing how I am on the short side of the height ladder. With one quick but unsubtle move I manage to worm my way through the gap landing stomach first on the cream carpet, thankfully it wasn’t that loud and I managedto gather myself and rush to my feet.
I was sitting staring at him, taking in his breath – taking looks, from behind and just stumbled over to the bed, hooked off my shoes and lay beside him... and hugged and held on to him so he was safe and secure from the dreaded black night.