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Power Is A Burden

Novel By: EmoGothVampGurl

Ametrista was a lost girl. She couldn't find herself. he thought herself as a bad person who took others for granted. So she finds friends who accept her, but they make her feel welcome. Others make her feel not welcome and alone. So life for her becomes a living hell.

People begin to die around her like dropping flies. She feels like she's worthless and is just death in a bottle. Will Ametrista be able to get through and pull herself out of this rut and be able to survive? Or will everyone die and she be held responsible for it? View table of contents...


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Submitted:Apr 6, 2012    Reads: 14    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   

Chapter 8

I knew that I was probably dead and just having some kind of afterlife tease. I could feel that I wasn't really breathing and this phase was teasing me of what I'll never be able to do again. I scracthed the back of my head and looked at my hands and they were covered in blood. I blinked once and I could see my waist and down. I blinked one more time and I was lying in a dark bedroom. This afterlife just loved to make me fucking miserable and say that I wasn't aloud to move on until I felt complete pain. But then the door opened and a shadow was walking up to me. My eyes were just peeked open and I could see the face of Alex. I wasn't breathing, but my body was still functioning. Alex quietly sat on the bed and touched my pulse point on my neck. By the tears in his eyes he knew that I was still alive and fighting for it to. I damn sure was. I fought hard and took and shaky breath.

"Ame?," he leaned over me his face mere centimeters from me.

I tried to speak, but it came out more as mumbles and sounds. I tried to force my eyes open to see his face. I wanted so badly to hold him and kiss him; to tell him that I'm okay and I'm not going fucking anywhere. My eyes shot open to a dim light room and a candle beside me on a nightstand.

"Guys!," Alex screamed and leaned down and kissed my lips.

I couldn't respond. I couldn't move my lips and kiss him back. Everyone ran in and gathered around the bed that I was lying on leaving the door open with more light. Everyone gasped at me and that made me scared. I wanted to ask 'what', but I couldn't because all that came out were small sounds. Everyone gave me questionable looks and Kashmina was focused on me.

"I can't talk," the thought floated in my head and Kashmina repeated it.

"She can't talk," Kashmina looked at me.

I was able to at least sit up. Everyone was ready to catch my head just in case I fainted. I swung my bare legs over the side of the bed and saw I was wearing a night gown. I looked at my toes and breathed out. I got up quickly and Alex was right beside me. I fell and landed in Ale'xs arms.

"Damn it! That hurt!," I shouted in my thoughts.

I nodded reassuring him that I could try again. When he set me up so I was putting pressure on my legs I just fell over again. Alex caught me before I could do any more harm to myself. He scooped me up bridal style and looked at everyone.

"Does she need more blood?," Carl asked thinking I just didn't have enough blood in my system.

"No. She's a toddler," Kashmina said.

"No I'm not!," I screamed making her cringe in pain.

"Doesn't look like she is," Star said looking my body up and down.

"No. She's a toddler in body language. Her mind, thoughts, and her attempted actions are all normal. But on the outside she's a simple toddler," Kashmina told everyone.

"Does that mean I'm going through life again?!," I was a little nervous that I'd never be able to be me again.

"I don't know," Kashmina bit her lip.

I sniffled and felt my own thumbs were moving inadvertedly without me wanting them to. I stopped moving my thumbs and sat them in my lap. I was walked out of my bedroom still being carried by Alex and saw that we weren't intheir regular hosue. It wasn't even their house it looked like a summer home. I looked around and saw an ocean outside the window. I leaned my head against the underside of Alex's chin and was set on the couch. i smiled and felt the plump plush cushions. I lied on m back on the huge couch and laughed. On the inside I felt mature and intelligent, but on the outside I felt immature and naive. Without control I was a total anew. I wasn't myself and I didn't feel depressed energy or some kind of tug to feed on a sexual energy. I looked at Kashmina and she was staring at me while everyone else was at the door.

"We should get her dressed before people start to arrive," Joey said.

"Good point," Star said.

I nodded my head shaking my hair around and everyone laughed at me. I was picked up again and taken up a small flight of stairs and down the hall. Alex took me in a bathroom and shut the door. He set me on the sink counter and locked the door. He turned the shower on and steam began to fill the room. He'd taken off his t-shirt and walked up to me. He kissed my forehead and held my face in his hands.

"We'll find a way to get you better," he smiled.

"God I hope so. I wish you could hear me though Alex," I stared into his eyes.

I raised my pointer finger to his lips and traced them lightly. Then traced my own lips with my same finger trying to tell him thaat I wanted a kiss, but using some kind of hand motions. He smiled and laughed leaning down to kiss my lips. I could just barely kiss him back trying to say I really wanted to kiss him. He pulled away and took his hand in mine.

"Don't force yourself so hard okay?," he told me.

I nodded and felt him lift me up and the tips of my toes grazed the tiled floor. He'd lifted me up and his arms wrapped around my legs and began to lift the night gown up until he'd taken it off. I was wearinga sports bra and some panties. Alex put his arm back around my waist and opened the shower door. It looked like he wasn't going to take any more of his clothes off. I gripped the sink counter-top and made a whineing noise. He looked at me and I tugged at the belt loop of his jeans. He gave me the are-you-serious-you-just-died-look. I tightened my grip on the sink until he gave in. He set me back on the sink and he didn't stop staring into my eyes as he dropped his jeans and boxers. I felt him step near me and his finger tips brush the underside of my sports bra. I lifted my arms up and he pulled it off me then lifted me back up. He slid my panties down and got in the shower holding me.

I wasn't applying any pressure to my legs butthe tips of my toes were still just barely touching. I felt the shower water rain down on me and wet my long hair. I tilted my head up into the water and felt Alex's eyes were roaming my face and upper chest. I looked back at him and used my pointer finger and tapped his temple. He didn't know what I wanted. I tapped his temple and then a little higher then I pointed to my ear.

"Tell you what I'm thinking?," he said questionably.

I nodded my head feverishly and smiled. This was the only way I could communicate than I'd have to work my ass off for someone to understand me unless Kashmina just wanted to be my translater. But I think that'd be just a little strange. Plus she said she'd never go in my thoughts unless I said she could. I felt invaded when I knew that she could read my thoughts.

"Well I was wondering if you were feeling like yourself," he said.

"How in the hell am I going to answer him?!," my mind was freaking out.

I sniffled and locked his stare. I focused all of my attention on getting my vocal cords to work and words to come out. I made a squeeking noise and that made me a little angry that that was the best that I could do.

"Don't hurt yourself Ame," Alex tried to stop me, "nevermind that I asked."

I shook my head and tried again and this time a word came out strained and quiet, but I got something out of me. I'd said 'Alex' in a squeeking little girl voice, but at least I said it. I looked at Alex and smiled. At least progress was coming along slowly. He smiled and kissed me quickly, but with a lot of hope and passion. He shut the water off and grabbed me a towel. I was set on the counter again so he could grab a black bath robe. He put it on and tied it. I was carried bridal style to a bedroom that was unfamiliar to me. There were two dressers and a queen sized bed. I looked at Alex's face and he set me on the bed.

"This isour room until further notice," he said.

He pulled me out a white bra with lace edges and a matching pair of panties. He went to a walk-in closet and pulled out a black dress bag. He unzipped it and showed me a lovely green and blue dress that was absolutely gorgeous. It was a v-neck and down to the mid-thighs. There was a belt like piece in themiddle.I smiled and felt excited that I was so spoiled by Alex. He helped me put on my clothes and pulled on his boxers and jeans. He had lied me on my stomach on the bed, but I'd slid half off and half on. He kneeled behind me and kissed the very top of my exposed shoulder blade. I felt him pulled the dress back then zip it and clip it. He tied the bow in the back and set me back on the bed on my back. My arms were still a little weak so it was a little hard for me to push myself up into a sitting position. So I just lied there and enjoyed the view of Alex getting dressed.

He turned to me and was wearing a green and blue shirt that matched my dress. He wore a tux jacket over his shirt and turned towards me.

"I'm sorry," he walked over and lifted me up.

I grabbed his arm and lifted my rag-doll body up and felt his lips on mine. I was getting better and was able to meld my lips with his in this kiss and it sent me chills of his love. I felt his lips slowly pull away pulling my upper lip with his. I smiled and was ready to go wearing a pair of bllack ballet shoes and a black vest with one middle button. I felt my feet just barely having the motion to look like I was actually walking. When we got back downstairs people had filled the entire room and the small garden that was visible adjoining this common room. Alex greeted people and told them who I was, but I just noddede and made motions. I felt uncomfortable not being able to social. I got the urge up to speak and whispered in a hushed tone 'Alex'. It sounded like a groan, but his attention went straight to me.

He excused us and took me to what ws the kitchen I knew. He set me on the stove island and looked up at me. I planted a kiss on his forehead.

"What's wrong?," he asked searching my eyes for an answer.

"I feel so awkward," I thought in my head and my eyes flicked back to the party.

"The party," he breathed.

I looked down and felt myself on the verge of tears. It was so hard not to talk. I'm pretty sure this is the longest I've gone without talking considering it's against my will that I cant speak. He pulled his lips to mine and kissed me with a lot of emotioins that half I couldn't tell if they were directly towards me or inadvertently at me. I could feel my lips feeling a little bit swollen but I didn't care and kissed him back. He brought me to the edge of the island his hands on the back of my thighs and my arms around his neck. Alex was moaning in my mouth, but I wasn't moaning. I wanted to tell him how much that he meant to me and I felt myself internally moaning. Tears were slipping out my eyes and I felt Alex wipe them away with his thumbs. I wanted to show him that there would be no change about me. I stopped and put my finger up to his lips and looked at him. I took that finger and pointed upstairs. He smiled and picked me up by the back of my thighs and ran us upstairs in the blink of an eye. I was on the bed on my back and Alex had went straight back to kissing me.

I felt the heat and every touch was 100X heightened. I was lifted up and my vest and shoes were quickly gone. I felt that Alex wasn't wearing jacket and some of his buttons were unbuttoned. I pushed it off his shoulders and it was gone within moments. I was up against a wall before I knew it and my dress was untied and unzipped. The sleeves were sagging off my shoulders as Alex kissed up and down my neck. I wasn't able to speak and could make very few sounds, but whatever sounds I made were moans. I felt my dress disappear and I was half dressed now. I gripped the back of Alex's head and was on the bed once again. This time I was missing my bra and panties. I pulled him down to me and he trailed down my body. He slipped his jeans off and boxers. I wanted tolet him to do whatever he wanted to with me. But when he got lower than my naval and pressed my hips upward begging for his attention without even saying a word. His tongue slipped out and lavished at my core drinking and giving me sexual frustrations beyond belief. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs in ecstasy with Alex showing him that he was amazing. He came back up trailing his tongue and kissed me letting me taste my arousel.

I felt him in me and let out as much of a moan as I could manage and felt myself squeezing him. I felt pain, not a good type of pain either. Like I realized I wasn't feeding from Alex. It's not like I was reborn again and a virgin again. Was I? Because it felt likeI would've already if I had. But it was strange. We rolled so that I was on top; my long hair cascading down my body covering as much (and little) as it could. I was on the brink of falling over and wanted to scream so bad and let all of this out. If I ever did scream I'm sure the whole house would hear. I bounced and grinded myself until I could feel Alex's pain of him throbbing and wanting to wait for release until after I did.

"Ame, cum with me," he whispered deeply in my ear.

I was just totally gone then. I lost it and toppled as we rolled over again and Alex had moaned his release. Oh, but no. I didn't moan at all. I all-out completely screamed at the top of my lungs Alex's name feeling the frustrations flood out of me.

"Alex!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!," I screamed feeling exhausted and my throat burned from trying so hard to moan and that last scream.

I felt Alex slip his arm under me and roll us over so I lied on his chest. Our breathing was uneven, rugged, and sweat made our bodies glisten. I finally felt my breathing settle and looked up at Alex face. He had stroked my hair for just about twenty minutes. Alex had decided we'd just wait a little longer until we'd go back out the bedroom and back to the party.


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