I am at war with myself.
I am at war with doubt.
I am at war with anger.
I am at war with my own human nature that makes me enemies with God and everything good.
My one question is who will win?
The faithful me, or the faithless me?
Will I remain loyal to God, or become a traitor to everything sacred to me?
Will my life mean something to someone other than God, or will I lead a pointless life until god finally sets me free from this pain filled exitence?
My one wish is for my life to mean something to someone other than God, then I can die happy when God decides that it is time for me to come home.