My Little Dutch Monkey Cat
To my little sister Daisy
I try to be a sweetheart but my unconscious
plays such a trick out of me.
The sun broke through the open window and the clock sounded seven-thirty A.M. I listened. I heard Lola's dog in the backyard hauling like a hungry wolf. First I heard Mister John's parakeet, in a shrill voice like an old woman, calling "Curratimatiii! "Curratimitiii!" "Curratimitiii!" to her owner just down the porch. The mocking bird of Langloh, along with the wild bees of Barry, imitating any sort of sound around two miles away. Perhaps now I was thinking about my Little Dutch Monkey Cat. I said "I was"...because I wanted to be agreeable to her. Indeed, she felt the bad temper of Lola's monster dog! from the window. I experienced the sensation of someone was watching me. I looked down toward my feet. There! my Little Dutch Monkey Cat was standing there on the edge of the bed. She stared at me with her big, pretty eyes while se was making a desperate attempt to see herself as other member of the house. Quickly in succession she played with the blanket and then she walked elegantly towards my face and stopped. I touched her. After done this, she began to make funny noise and began also to inflate her loins. In this way she moved back and forth. It was a strange behavior at first. When I first took her from the street, I was surprised by the ritual, but now I knew what it meant: food. However when I was carefully edging her towards the floor, she started to get out under the blanket. I shout and she jumped quickly and ran to the doorway. She looked at, with great expectation all my movements. When finally I sat on the edge of the bed, sleepy and with heavy headaches, she jumped up again on the bed and stood there on the right spot motionless. As soon as I stood up she started to rub herself against my ankle. I understood it as the most splendid entertainment between her and me. After all I knew what she wanted: food. I seized her and threw her on the bed and then I turned back. She jumped promptly and reached the hall. There she made a desperate attempt to rid myself of ignorance her, and she put herself in front of me. But it was not for long, because she didn't see me go by. Then she looked up, made a disposal movement, what she did not see me and went back to the hall. I watched her; I judged it. And she wondered if I had intention might go back to the room or kept going where I supposed to go, which I consulted just before she stopped me from going back to the room, moving back and forth in front of me. I have considered her anxiety. I smiled sadly. She came back again when she didn't see any movement more at all from me. Now she walked elegantly over in front of me and stood fee feet away from me with an effect of love and of inquiry. It went down when she did not see any indication to obtain to her what she wanted. There was not doubt that she acted very analytic to all my movements, in spite of any collection of myself. Now she began to rub my right leg and she did not let me go through another room, except to go the kitchen site. For a moment my Little Dutch Monkey Cat held herself up in the distance, scratching with her long fingernails on the carpet with funny or fierce movement and then, checking my movements to discover my stay there, came back around me. I had the feeling she pushed me at the end of the living room and frightfully to understand why, I had a strange vibration. All this was fast. She peered into my eyes and then scratched my skin for several times. I moved forward. She made another funny sound this time undergraduate her feelings and position against my actions. However, she was rubbing lightly against my ankle as if she wanted to stop me to go the bathroom and put more attention to her needs. For a while both eyes met. Unfortunately her eyes did not explain what was that burning light I saw into her dark-blue eyes. I heard to myself to say there was not food left. I closed I saw myself closing the refrigerator impossible to think that it was the real true. I took it away from my vision and opened it again when I arrived. There the coldness hole I found a little of bean and chicken leg. They were fermented and with a strong smell coming from them. Suddenly I closed the door and I was still wrapped in that smell, I went back frightened. At the same time, I felt pain in my back. I thought my back was hurt badly, because I went too fast backward against the bottles wine sitting at wall. I heard someone said, "You will never get away with this!" I have a fraction of second to look back to the refrigerator and think hard what was going on around me. But I couldn't. So like a lightning bolt I turned my eyes toward the Little Dutch Monkey Cat, back to the living room, if I wherever I felt about it, I thought she was very sad about that. Nobody was there. No matter how I tired I was, I was aware with that strange sensation of it. Sudden I felt cold, and my echoes of my voices and the thrill of that VOICE, began to be part of an unknown world. When the stricken back against my body, I realized the window was opening. I went there and closed it. Under that whispering voice, I looked for my Little Dutch Monkey Cat; I stood in front at it, I went back in confusion and when I stared at the window was opening again. I went there and retreated to myself to close it and came back to the living room. I changed my mind and looked out. I saw there the Little Dutch Monkey Cat stood up in the edge of the window and when she saw me, began to walk to the end of that edge, smiling. I devoid again the strange feelings and began to wondering. I was getting up nervous and the cold was starting cook my face. I couldn't stay more longer in that window because of cold wind and I came back and with every stride in my heart. I saw myself hopeless and tried to pour myself some hot drink, but I couldn't either. I looked although the mirror. My face was red and black were my lips where they began to lose all kind of life. I realized that my Little Dutch Monkey Cat was asking me for something. I remembered something and maybe it would be good for her. I went back to the kitchen and hurried ready to open the refrigerator's door. I did not understand this concentration mine, pointing only that all the matters were a quickly vision of my tired morning. Wondering about this confusion, I opened the door. If my eyes did not recognize it, I guess, I was just in a spirit on a matter of misunderstanding. There was everything in order. Though the food was the same, nothing was changing. I smiled. I helped myself to pull out that food. Just at this moment, as I moved to the right side, the Little Dutch Monkey Cat jumped into the living room and seated on her two legs as a faithful dog, and then she started sprang to her feet, scratched, and said, "Miaow!-Miaow!" I hovered over if she were a child was crying, took her and I walked to the kitchen. I put her on the table and put then the chicken leg in front of her. She took a few second to figure out just how nice I was. But there was her brightness dark blue eyes which they were trying to say SOMETHING to me. They seemed to be worry and had more attention to each movement mine. I followed these round eyes. They were like two shell impossible to penetrate into it. They were in other way inaccessible. Immediately I recognized that there was something went wrong badly. "What is it..." They made an inaccessible movement. There were also a shoot stick very deep and very consistent inside them. "You can't read me"..."Then what is it?".."May I know what was wrong was that the food was not Cat's food?" "So..?" "What was that?"...She made a move toward me. I never saw that movement before, and it was fiercely, lovably at the same time when she was ready to jump over me. My heart beat fast. But nothing happened. She went up before me, and I was breathing. I must be the one in this situation because with those eyes watched me and powered little by little was growing and growing from my Little Dutch Monkey Cat. She stopped. Now she made the same funny noise once more. Then she came closer and was rubbing lightly against my ankle as if she wanted to stop me and put completely attention to her. The reason because I thought to go to the refrigerator and open it. These affections really stopped me without lose my fear. But her dark-blue eyes were still on me. I smiled like a husband ready to kiss his wife. And when I was reaching to her, as she was thinking it what was coming over her; I tried to take her and give certain caress. Again she moved back. I said something: "Don't be silly. Come to me"....I was still walking toward her while she was walking toward the living room. I stopped. She stopped and made another moved to opposite direction. And with a sudden movement beyond any understanding, she jumped over me and crossed my face with her fingernails. I pulled her, not with anger but without understand it. And what I saw when I pulled her like that her two fierce eyes were more intense. However, I haven't noticed it too late, and I just found into it anger or that warning of them? That was important but it was incomprehensible for me. I was not thinking in warning; but I shook my head and came back toward the refrigerator. With noiseless stride my Little Dutch Monkey Cat went back and forth, then among my legs; and I was still repeating not conversation at all, but a overdraw muttering. It was like this. "It will be okay!" "How's that!" How's that! How's that!" The Little Dutch Monkey Cat made another sharp move below my knees, and then turned in front of me, and tried to stop me at once more. When I parted her, then I opened the refrigerator; suddenly, a terror of smell spreading all over against me. I started to shake myself and fixed my eyes with those eyes now still like animals back there, seated on two legs, watched me. I was still shake, awakening of her greatly powered me. I tried to grasp myself from the refrigerator's door but I couldn't. I felt I was losing strength under these eyes and among this strong smell. From a moment to another, I saw myself into the coldness hole, then my two arms, and joined to it, my body. In this coldness of confusion and terror when my body was completed inside of the refrigerator, I started to scream--a scream of death and terror, terror and death, like the two merged into real figure little by little was disappearing in front of me. And then a sharply backward, the refrigerator's door closed behind him. I was avoid being looked at it ghastly figure out of my sight. From the moment I sensed I was alone in the room. I tried to cry but I recognized that I haven't tears. When I went back to his room, I looked around me. I smiled. That was a dream? or being alone and sleep very quite at the same time? I smiled again. There was not sound either, nothing. I was happy now. I have all this room for myself. Tomorrow I walked for an hour to see if everything were okay around this place. Then I was looking for another neighborhood and another room. It seemed that it was be alright. The whole thing will be just fine as always...