1. Take someone's shopping cart and switch the items with stuff
from the person next to them's cart
2. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you
in so long!…" etc. See if they play along to avoid
3. Smash the person in front of you on the head with a ham
4. Go up to some old geezer & say "Grandpa!!! You're ALIVE!!!
It's a MIRACLE!!! etc."
5. Take something from someone else's cart, when they say "hey,
that's mine! " call the security and say that the other … person
was trying to take your _____
6. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
7. Hide in the center of the clothes circle where people find
shirts, and jump out and yell
8. Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell
"THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!!"
9. Get a batman costume, put it on, and run around
the store screaming at
the top of your lungs, "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!"
10. Hide between clothing and then jump out and yell "PICK
11. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask,
"Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
12. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale
battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men
13. Hide in a clothes circle. When someone with a shopping cart
goes by stick your hand out and steal something from them
14. Grab a guitar and start singing Wake Me Up When September
Ends in a loud shrieking half screaming voice
15. Randomly place 24 bags of
candy in peoples carts
16. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
17. Go up to an employee and in a official tone say "code three
in house ware" and see what happens
18. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five
feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the
19. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift
20. Set up a concert of singing hamster dolls. Get your friends
and turn them on all at the same time. Then act like a
21. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if
there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples
22. Open a pack of yugioh cards and challenge random people to a
23. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and
get into a very serious conversation
24. Tape a walkie-talkie to the back of a Barbie doll and say to
random people, "I know where you live…"
25. Attempt to drown in a kiddy pool…
26. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and
relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain
that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little
umbrella in it
27. Open up random packages in the toy aisle then walk off. If an
employee asks what you're doing, just say "I changed my
28. Run around Wal-Mart in a bathing suit singing the Surfin' USA
29. Say things like, "Would you be as kind so to direct me to
30. If an employee comes within 30 ft scream "GET AWAY FROM
ME!!!" Then run out of the store screaming
31. Walk up to an employee and ask questions like how come this
store is called wal mart? Or what's up with your hair? Why do you
people wear name tags can't you all remember your own
32. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the
33. Glare menacingly at anyone who comes within 40 ft of you.
Then hiss like a snake and act like you're going to bite
34. Throw a fake rubber snake into some lady's face and watch her
35. Squeeze their legs and either sing, "I like to move it, move
it! Or say "You got chicken legs!"
36. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from
37. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's
signs on the doors of the rest room
38. Bring your pet pit-bull into Wal-mart. Act casual. If someone
is brave enough to walk up to you and tell you to get out, simply
reply "He's going to help me pick out his favorite dog
39. TP as much of the store as possible
40. Whenever you hear a voice saying, clean up etc fall to the
ground sobbing screaming the voices!! then get back up & act
41. Dress up in a trench coat & wear sunglasses. Walk up to
someone browsing and say "The rooster is in the nest" Wait for a
reply. After they finish talking, hand them a cap gun and whisper
"use this wisely."
42. Go to the music aisle and start singing horrible
43. Walk along look at someone giggle at them & say to no
one… I know I know… hehehe keep doing it until they give you a
weird look & walk off
44. Set all the alarm
clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day
45. Go in to the camping department and enter a tent then tell
random customers that they can come in if they bring a pillow
from the bedding department
46. Broadcast K-mart commercials over the intercom
47. Go up to the bagel section with cream cheese all over your
face. Then start chanting, "We love bagels! We love
48. Over the intercom say there is a big sale on all items in
electronics department and first 10 people to the check outs gets
one item free… & see what happens
49. Randomly start putting different size undergarments in
50. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the
spray air fresheners
51. Run through the store and jump on random peoples carts
singing I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODYS NERVES!!
52. Go up to random people and poke them. If they ask you what
you're doing or tell you to stop, tell them that you're trying to
find out what they ate for dinner last night
53. Do your American Idol audition in front of the security
54. Get a marker & go over all the barcodes with a line then
go purchase your items… the person who is serving you will have
to enter all the barcodes in by hand
55. Go up to some of the customers while your carrying a paper
bag and say "trick or treat!" and if they don't give you
anything, do the sad puppy dog face
56. Hide under a big pile of clothes and throw random objects at
people when they walk by
57. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and
begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good
58. Walk up to a pizza place and ask for a Mcchicken
59. Go to the bathroom with a cantaloupe (hidden) Make grunting
noises and drop the cantaloupe in the
toilet. Then say "Phew, That's better"
60. Put blue paint on your hand and when you see someone put your
hand on their shirt and point at them and say, "A clue a
61. Go to a clerk and tell them u lost your son and ask if they
can call his name over the speaker! When they ask u his name make
up a ridiculous name
62. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters
63. While Humming the theme to Mission Impossible While wearing
all black, knock over all of the cans
64. Take all the CD's put them in the wrong place and when an
employee puts them all back yell at her and mess them up
65. Go to the front of the store in a baby diaper and ask a macho
guy to change you
66. Take a friend with you and a younger child and start arguing
over who gets custody then have the child run away and out of the
store and yell CILLY COME BACK!!!
67. Climb up a ladder & try doing a King Kong thing
68. Run through the make-up department and yell, "There's a dead
body in aisle 3!!!"
69. Grab a can of whipped cream & find a bald guy Spray it on
70. Dress up in a fairy costume, and climb up a ladder and when
people go by say "your wish is granted"
71. Dress up as a giant smiley face and whip price signs! Then
72. Walk up to someone act like you can read their mind &
say… sir or madam… don't think that.
73. Walk towards a group of people and hit your head and say in a
loud voice, "Shut up in there."
74. Put make up all over your face so it looks like a 2 year old
did it and then say, "She's horrible at giving make-overs!" and
point to a random woman.
75. Go up to random people and ask them if they will be your
friends then link arms and start to sing the friends theme
76. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the
77. Smear ketchup on yourself, lie on your back in the kids
aisle, and pretend to be dead
78. Lay a 20 dollar bill on the ground and back away and when
someone tries to pick it up run up to them and yell hands off my
dollar!! Then got to a manager and tell him that they stole 20
dollars from you
79. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles
80. Try all of the sodas and put them back then say, "Yup, that
stuff's not poisonous."
81. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello"
82. Run up to random people and ask if they like green eggs and
83. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags, then attempt to fit
others into very large gym bags
84. Bang on the pots and pans in the cooking aisle
85. Act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground
screaming and having convulsions
86. Swing on the half price banners
87. Go up to a random person and tap on his/her shoulder. When
the person looks at you, ask what and walk off like you're
88. Burp and say mmmm, tasty
89. Hold Barbie for ransom
90. Run around with a country music cd and sing Queen's "We Will
91. throw random items over into the next aisle and see if you
can score into someone's cart
92. Ride around in a Barbie jeep with Barbie in the front seat
and act like you're talking to her by saying "Let's bust this
93. Wrap a hose around you and shout, "AAH! I'M BEING HELD
94. Do your own radio show over the intercom
95. Go to the aisle with the Star Wars stuff and hold up a Luke
Skywalker toy and say "Luke, I am your father" and make breathing
noises in your darth vader mask
96. Glue pennies on the floor 'heads' side up
97. Knock over all the shelves and run around screaming
'EARTHQUAKE! EVERYON RUN!
98. find a pair of walkie talkies and have a conversation with
your self when everyone is watching you
99. Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to
the same cash register, until the clerk notices
100. Grab heavy but not too heavy objects, and see who can throw
them the most aisles over
101. Buy expensive stuff, go home and use white-out and a pen to
change the price to something much lower, and the total much
higher, then return and demand a refund
102. get a cardboard box, go in the store and pop out of the box
and give out candy to passerby
103. Find the fish section and when someone walks by begin to pet
the fish tank and say, "I know how you feel…"
104. Spill water on the floor, and run around claiming that the
store is flooded
105. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner say
"BEEP" in a loud voice. Repeat this for every item, and for other
106. Scream really loudly and when someone tells you to be quiet
scream, "I will not be silenced!!!!"
107. Hold a bag of frozen veggies over your head and yell "Fear
me and my evil army of frozen carrots!!"
108. Hug someone randomly and say, "I love u mommy!"
109. Go in the undergarments section and ask random people if
they think this will fit
110. Tie a plushie to one end of a string your ankle to the other
end, and run around screaming "HELP! IT'S AFTER ME!"
111. Start yelling at the stuffed animals when there are people
112. Grab some pampers Pull-Ups and while buying them yell at the
clerk "Mommy, guess what? I'm a big kid now!!"
113. Go into the bedding department and with cookies in your hand
lay on a bed then pretend ur having a nightmare about cookies and
yell " COOKIE!! COOKIE!!!! NOOOOOO!!!!" Then start rolling
114. Make evil eyes at someone and start whispering, "I'm the
little girl from the well… I've been waiting…"
115. Go to the cafeteria area and buy frys. Then stand by the
door and when people walk through throw the frys above their head
like there getting married
116. look at old people with wide eyes saying, "I see dead
117. Get a tent ( With holes preferably ) and tell people to come
in your lair. When they do chuck popcorn at them and ask them who
invited them in
118. Ride around on those electric cars and pretend that your a
prissy English Man. Say things like "Cheerio, good man." to
people who walk by. And don't forget to have perfect
119. Chase your friends up and down aisles trying to run over
them with those electric cars. Make sure to tell your friends to
act like they don't know you.
120. Spend all your money riding on those little rides for
toddlers. Fit the character; if you on a horse, then pretend that
your a cowboy, etc. And if a little kid comes over wanting to use
it, start barking at them until they run away crying.
121. Have silly string fights with a friend. Hide behind
customers and "accidentally" hit the people instead of your
122. Draw mustaches on all the pictures and mannequins.
123. Walk up to the customer service and when they say "Hello,
how may I help you?" say "Yes, I'll have a Quarter Pounder with
cheese, one strawberry shake, a large order of french fries and a
diet coke." And when they start to talk, say "Oh, to go". Then
when they say that they can't give it to you say "Oh, This is
because I'm gay isn't it? I'd expect this from McDonalds, but not
124. Get popcorn and throw at customers, sneaking up on them in
an un stealth-like way, while yelling random things 125. Start to
madly scratch yourself and walk up to people asking where the
rash cream is because your family and all your friends seem to
have a rash too.
126. When your alone, have loud conversations with your "multiple
personalities". Have an English man, a Southern person, someone
from New York, a Grandma, and a 5 year old girl all at the same
time. You have to use accents.
127. Start "dancing" like mad. Basically, just wail your arms and
legs around like your having some kind of massive seizure.
128. Try on crazy costumes and walk casually through the
129. Stick your arm in your jacket and suspiciously start to
leave the store. Get really tense and start to lean over as your
walking through the doors As if your suspecting the alarms to go
off. Then when it doesn't go off, let out a big sigh. Then
quickly look around you to see who's watching and run away as
fast as you can.
130. Balance EVERYTHING you see on the tips of your finger, your
nose, your forehead, and the top of your head while singing the
131. Spend hours staring at a little blinking light. After a
while, start saying blink everytime it blinks. Don't look away,
just stay mesmerized.
132. Light a match under a sprinkler
133. Walk up to someone and say "Oh, so your back for more. I
warned you never to come back here. Wait here while I go get my
shot gun". Then walk away.
134. Buy something that is like $5 and give the cashier all
135. Walk up to a guy and say "Oh my god, is it you? Oh my god it
is!!! I haven't seen you in so long!!!!" Then kiss him. Then slap
and him say "Why didn't you ever call me??" Then walk away. Much
more affective if you're a guy.
136. Stand next to a maniquin and pretend that your a mannequin.
Try to hold the same position for as long as possible. Then
finally as someone is walking by, check your watch and say.
"Finally, my shift is done. I really don't get paid enough to do
137. Stare at the ceiling. See how many people look up.
138. Start singing oldies songs in to megaphone.
139. start hitting on the mannequins.
140. Super-glue a quarter to the floor and count how many people
try to pick it up.
141. Switch the price tags with something expensive and something
142. Put women's clothes into men's carts.
143. Put preppy stuff, like short skirts and whatnot, into old
men's carts when they aren't looking.
144. Run around in front of a mirror screaming "COPYCAT!"
145. Bring a friend and a stopwatch. Get carts and race around.
every time you nock something over, subtract a second from your
time. You usually get kicked out before you figure out who
146. Find a couple. Run up to the one who is an opposite gender
from you, slap them, and say "WHAT IS THIS? I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD
147. Go up to an assistant and ask for mayonnaise. When they say
they don't have it, start crying and scream, "Now how am I
supposed to paint my toenails?!?"
148. Lay on the floor and do a ground angel
149. Steal their ketchup, go on the counter, smear ketchup all
over you and say HELP ME HELP ME! OMG! THE HOTDOG KILLED
150. Start jumping on one of their beds attempt to fall asleep
until one guy tells you to get off. Then yell 'HEY! WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?!?!? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! GET AWAY FROM MY
151. Run around switching all of the open signs on the cash
registers to closed and all of the closed signs to open. Watch
the customers get confused.
152. Ask for Goat Milk
153. Make sure somebody's in the same aisle, then run screaming
into a wall. Fall down and say "AHHH! The pain, the horrible,
terrible pain!" Until someone asks if you're alright. When they
do, get up and say, "Yes, I'm fine, why?" And then walk away
calmly like nothing happened.
154. Dress up as an emo kid, then scream at people, "WHY HAVE YOU
COME TO WORSEN MY MISERY?!"
155. Dress up as a ninja and go around the store karate chopping
156. Ride a horse on a stick toy thing and have your friend pull
you around the store on a skateboard while you scream, "The
British are coming! The British are coming!"
157. Turn a cart over and put towels over it so they can't see
in. when someone starts to open it, start yelling "Hey, I'm Using
the Bathroom in here!!!"
158. Buy a chocolate bar, go to the bathroom, smear chocolate on
your hand, reach under the next stall and ask, "Can I have some
159. Take a fishing pole, tie it to a dollar, and go fishing for
160. Climb up to one of the really high shelves and start singing
Christmas carols at the top of your lungs. Works better around
161. Get a mirror and put it on top of a cart so it lay across
it. Get on top and have someone push you down an isle, and Sing
162. When the intercom comes on, fall on your knees and scream in
tears of joy, "God has spoken!!!"
163. Get on a bike and ride around and crash into everything and
everyone who gets in your way.
164. Pour a bunch of lemonade from the entrance to the bathroom
and come out saying someone should have told me where the
bathroom was quicker!
165. Steal guns and ammo and shoot all the TV's you can find.
whoever blows up most wins
166. Get an umbrella and have someone in a cart (or just a tall
person) pour water on it while you sing Raindrops Are Fallin' On
167. Call the front desk and when they answer the phone say I'm
sorry, your call could not be completed as dialed. Please hang up
and try again. Then call and say I'm sorry, I will have to put
you on hold. Can you call back? I'm busy on isle 3.
168. Go into one of those employees only doors and go behind some
food shelves. when people reach out to grab food, grab their arm
and start to pull on it.
169. eat all the ice cream boxes and then blame it on a worker
with ice cream all over your face
170. Pour carrots on the floor so the employees have to pick it
up. Continue doing it for a long period of time.
171. Skate around on a skateboard, then fall over and pretend to
break your leg.
172. Start playing the violin.
173. Stare at a blank T.V, for an hour and when somebody asks
what your doing, answer, "Shh, this is my favorite show!"
174. Stand on the conveyor belt at the check out with a barcode
on your forehead.
175. Start saying stuff like argetrargrehargenstartgen to
everyone who walks in.
176. walk around in dirty cloths and eat all the produce lika a
177. Poke people and run away screaming, "Don't touch
178. Stare at people for a minute and then smile at them
179. Beat your chest and run around screaming like Tarzan.
180. Throw stuff on the floor and start yelling at an imaginary
181. Shoot spitwads at people and then fall on the ground
182. Go into a bathroom that is of the opposite gender of
yourself and open the stalls saying, "Ooh la la!"
183. Walk up to random people, give them a hug, and say, "I love
184. Dress up as an old man and start stealing stuff
185. Start a fire, then sit around it with your friends in Indian
186. Walk around in a court jester costume
187. Run at people with a pitch fork
188. Pretend that you're having a heart attack
189. Throw tomatoes at people and then tackle them
190. Get on the intercom and calmly say, "Attention shoppers. I
would like to inform you that the world is about to end, and that
there's a sale on isle two."
191. Buy a carton of vanilla ice cream, run up to the cash
register, tell the cashier you forgot your money, then start
dancing like Napoleon Dynamite, screaming, "Where's my chap
192. Pretend to be Spiderman by running up walls and trying to
193. Claim isle three as your 'Secret Lair'
194. Run around the store singing the My Little Pony theme song
as loud as you can.
195. Get a giant Christmas stocking and hop around in it like
it's a potato sack on field day
196. Build a wall out of stuffed animals
197. Put on a cape and run around singing the Phantom of the
198. Yell curse words at people
199. Knock down as many displays as you can
200. Go up to a random old guy with white hair and say, "I want
Bratz for Christmas! Thank you Santa!" and then give him a hug
and run away.
201. Dress up in a super villain costume and then go around the
store yelling, "MARRY ME!" to random people
202. Go up to a tough looking guy and push him and say you wanna
fight? And when he pushes back start to cry and run away
203. Point to a cash register and ask the cashier, "How much is
204. Get a tent and campout with the Barbie dolls in the toy
205. Chew gum loudly in people's faces
206. Throw a poke-ball at someone and yell, "PIKACHU, I CHOOSE
207. Turn on all the flashlights, hang them from the ceiling,
stand under them, scatter confetti at your feet, and start
singing, using a Barbie as a microphone.
208. Play baseball in the middle of the store, then score a home
run and run around the store screaming.
209. Flirt with someone, plan a date, and then break up with
them, all in 10 minutes.
210. Get a cart and pile it high with items. When the cashier
tells you the price, exclaim, "What a rip off!" And walk out of
211. Start singing, "Tinkle, tinkle, little star! In a toilet
that's real far! Up above us in the sky! It's weird to learn that
pee does fly! Make sure it does never land! In my, my, my, my, my
212. Find all the beans you can and put them in your cart, and
then tell random people that it's your breakfast, lunch, and
dinner for the next couple years.
213. Pay for your stuff with all pennies, and then come up one
214. Scream, "Look! Someone's stealing an old lady's purse!" and
when they look away, take all the stuff in their cart and throw
it around the store shouting "I'm a terrorist!"
215. Run out of the dressing room screaming, "Michael Jackson has
216. Go to the pet isle. Point to a fish and say, "I'll have that
one. And that one. And that one…" Keep going until you've pointed
to every fish they have in stock
217. Tap dance through the store
218. Change the music on the intercom to Mexican
219. Rip open every package you see
220. Get on a bike and have your friend chase you. Pretend you
are going to run over somebody and then move out the way.
221. Stand in front of the security camera and pretend to die
222. Scream "SECURITY!" as loud as you can. When they come up act
all panicky and say "This is really important!" Then smile and
223. Sing "Mary Had A Little Lamb" as loud as you can in the
music section, then smile and say "Well, it's the music section
so I thought you might like some live music." Then sing it
224. Run around with underwear on your head, screaming, "I am
225. Follow a male security dude and ask him where the "feminine
226. Go to the toy isle, set up the GI joe figures and yell, "
Then it's WAR!!!"
227. Pull down your pants next to a flower display and "water"
228. Go to the bakery section and yell "I LOVE PIE!" to everyone
229. Take all the pets out of their cages, including the
230. Grab a strawberry shortcake doll and go to the bakery
section. Tell the baker "I'd like to buy strawberry shortcake!"
and hold the doll in their face.
231. Scream, "GET OUT OF MY YARD!" to everyone who walks by
232. Announce that there's a huge sale at Target
233. Throw a party in a busy isle
234. Test drive lawn mowers
235. Have a tennis tournament in the middle of the store
236. Throw all the bouncy balls in the toy section everywhere and
let them bounce around
237. Carry a bomb and make it explode
238. Eat a bunch of candy and refuse to pay for it
239. Go to the in store restaurant and order anything. When
receiving it tell them that this was not what you wanted. Refuse
to pay and go tell the manager
240. Hide in a pile of plushies and then jump out at people who
241. Act like an old lady and scream, "AH! I broke my back! This
wouldn't happen at Target!"
242. Pretend to be a life size Barbie. When someone wants to buy
you, run away screaming that someone was trying to kidnap
243. Take a marker to all the happy faces. Then change the
prices. That will start an uproar
244. When a clerk stops you and asks your name read their name of
their id card. When they say it's not your name scream, "IDENTITY
245. Throw jelly sweets at the cashiers
246. Steal a shopping cart(As in take it out of the store and put
it in your car)
247. Ride on the back of the carts. (they hate it when you do
that) Run into other carts yelling like a maniac.
248. Follow one person around the store. Poke them ever so often.
When the snap and yell at you scream, "STALKER!!"
249. Pretend like you're a person who works there and walk around
saying, "Can I help you find anything?"
250. Spill cooking oil all over the floor and then slide in
251. Pretend like you're blind and can't find what your looking
for. Go up to random people and ask, "Will you help me find some
cat food for Fluffy?"
252. Bowl with bottles full of open soda
253. Run around with a bowl of cheerios yelling, "It lowered my
254. Order a pizza from the cashier
255. Ask to have your pizza shaken, not stirred
256. Start a food fight
257. Go up to a fat woman and say, "Taxi?"
258. Put underwear over your shorts, get a blue shirt, yellow
paint, and red paint, paint an s on the shirt, go to the material
section, cut a red cape, then get an umbrella, open it, and jump
off the tops of shelves.
259. Take the spray paint and paint all the people around
260. Go up to random people and hug them while putting a 'Kick
Me' sign on the back of their shirt
261. Hide in dark places with a golden ring. when people walk by,
jump out at them hissing, "We wants it! You cants have it!" Then
gently whisper, "it will be alright my precious"
262. Flip off the manager
263. Go to the food section, take all of the boxed items out, and
stack them up to make a fort. Glue can help. And creating a
'distraction' elsewhere for the employees to handle while you
work does too…
264. Drop a pen and let someone else go and pick it up for you.
When they do try to pick it up yell to them, "HEY THATS MY PEN
265. Bring a slip n' slide blast some Music and bring some random
people to it and kick their back so they slide accross the slip
n' slide and scream "PARTY IN THE HIZ HOUSE!!!!!!!"
266. Throw a dance party
267. Write on the floors
268. Pull all the clothes off the racks into a pile on the floor
and hide under it, and when someone tries to pick the clothes up,
leap out cackling madly and run down the aisles, still
269. Go up to someone and say "look over there" Then pull down
their pants. And, if you're lucky, their underwear.
270. Pretend to have an asthma attack, and when someone tries to
help you, bite them. Or pretend to faint.
271. Get a bag of chips and walk around the store eating them.
When an employee tries to stop you or make you pay, tell them
that they're your chips! Keep screaming it.
272. Spray a customer with pepper spray and scream, "Help! Help!
He's a rapist!"
273. Pretend to be a rabid dog and run around growling at people.
Then if someone tries to stop you, bite them.
274. Lie on the floor. Just lie there. It is guaranteed to freak
people out. Either pretend to be asleep, or to have passed
275. Take toys and put them on the floor and take a cart. Start
running over the toys screaming, "Monster Truck Mania!!!"
276. Climb up the shelves/storage units, then refuse to come
277. Take red juice Pour it on your face make streaks or stripes
then layout on the floor with a flower in your hand when a crowd
of people come stand up and walk like a zombie!
278. Grab a bowl, spoon, milk, and cereal. Eat it right there and
tell them you'll pay when your done.
279. Stand on the conveyer belt when your checking out and walk
like its a treadmill… then ask for a speed increase
280. Wrap yourself in toilet paper rolls and pretend to be a
mummy looking for your wife, Cleopatra
281. Follow a stranger around and mimic them. Continue doing this
for a long period of time.
282. If you are in Target, say there is a code yellow
283. Get some candy corn form the candy aisle put two on your
canine teeth and go around the store biting peoples necks
284. Flirt with the manager's wife
285. Walk calmly to the CDs, when u see one that has Hilary Duff,
yell (if you're a fan) OHMIGOD! HILARY'S LATEST! OHMIGOSH, I,
LIKE HAVE TO HAVE THIS! (if you're not a fan) Find a hammer, take
the CD, gently put it on the floor, then mash it like a
286. Run around spinning and say you're the Tasmanian devil
287. Run around in circles and yell, "I'M THE CIRCLE MAN!"
288. Announce a sock-sliding contest and take off your shoes and
start sliding. It's actually really fun…
289. Go up to a employee ask for a application and where it says
goals write down 'to take over Wal-Mart' and turn it in
290. Get a water gun and threaten someone with it. A cashier is
usually a prime candidate. Then say in a low, dangerous voice
(without collapsing into laughter) "Empty out the cash
291. Take a soda, shake it up, and then spray it at people.
292. Hide in the clothes so when someone comes to look you yell,
293. Request that an employee find you an imaginary product, then
keep saying: "I know it's here somewhere, just keep looking!"
Eventually the employee will run out of patience, so then you
say: "You've been punked!" And run out screaming and laughing.
(Maybe you won't get kicked out, but you'll freak an employee
294. Print out a bunch of advertisements for Target, Marshalls,
etc… Then calmly go around taping/gluing/stapling them to
products, people, and walls. It helps to have a WHOLE lot of
295. Move things around. (Put frozen food in with the barbies,
296. If a fat person has a twinkies in their cart take it out and
start eating it and spit it out on them and yell, "That crud is
297. Point at an old man and yell, "LOOK EVERYONE! IT'S BRITNEY
298. Put a ski mask on and wear a black cape with black clothes
and a fake sword and yell, "Zoro has returned!"
299. Dress up as an old lady and whack people with your purse and
when employees come to stop you, pretend to faint
300. Go to Wal-Mart at 2:00 in the morning and do cartwheels
around the store screaming, "I'm pregnant!"
301. Put on a long wig and claim to be Pocahontas
302. Break some glass, then accuse a flying monkey
303. Threaten a cashier with a candy bar
304. Bring in scissors and glue. If anyone asks, tell them you
are fulfilling your dream of giving Wal Mart a Make Over.
305. Buy a bag of candy. Start to walk away, then ask if you can
exchange them. Repeat until they get angry.
306. Go to the dairy section and protest against milking cows.
Say things like, "What if the cows aren't ok with us milking
them? Cows have rights too!" 307. Redecorate the Rollback Smiley
Face so he is green with neon pink eyes.
308. Go up to the manager and ask where the nearest K-Mart
309. If you see a couple holding hands, run through their hands
and scream, "RED ROVER!"
310. Grab a gnome, then hide in a clothes rack and when someone
picks out a shirt or whatever jump out and yell "The gnome did
it! The gnome did it!" Then throw the gnome and run.
311. Put up free sample signs all over the store and watch people
leave with their "free samples."
312. Run around the store screaming, "OMG! HELP! PINTO BEANS ARE
TAKING OVER COSTCO! AHHH!"
313. In Walmart, they give out free stickers. Take them and
decorate your body with them. 314. Get a bunch of your friends,
about 10 or more, and go up to a lady who looks like she's in her
20's. When there are lots of people around, ask, "Mommy? Can we
have some ice cream?"
315. Spit in the manager's face
316. Stare at a customer for a long time while saying, "Hello,
hello, hello" nonstop until they get really mad
317. Go to customer service and say, "Your fat vallet guy stole
318. Put an "Out of Order" sign on the manager's butt
319. Go up to customers and whisper, "Seven Days…" and if they
turn around, pelt them with Skittles
320. Melt chocolate, then scream, "Free face masks!"
321. Wear a pair of bright yellow pants on your head and run
around screaming, "They Got Me!!"
322. Slap the manager and scream, "He's alive! He's
323. Put a lot of matches and gasoline in your cart, then smile
324. Run around the store five times, and when you are done,
scream, "I WIN!" and do a victory dance
325. Let a collie lose in the store, then scream, "Lassie, come
326. Make your friend that's a guy try on girl clothes and then
have him run around like a crazy person.
327. Hide in a boys clothes rack, and when a boy with glasses
walks by, scream, "You're a wizard, Harry!"
328. Grab lots of G.I. Joe action figures and Water Bombs and
yell, "ITS WAR!!!" whenever someone walks by and throw the bombs
329. Put a Dora toy on the floor and when someone tries to pick
it up, yell, "Swiper No Swiping!"
330. Buy a fake but expensive looking vase. (ex. a cheap glass
pot.) Fill it with some ash and soot. Then take it to an
employee, bump into him and drop it so it shatters. Then keep
screaming at him that it was your mother and you will sue him for
every thing he owns, and tell him he has to pick it up then and
there or he will be cursed for 10 years.
331. Put a squirt gun in a stuffed elmo's hand and scream,
"Everybody down!! Elmo's got a gun!"
332. Drive around in a kiddie car singing the batman theme
333. Run around with underwear on your head screaming, "I'm
334: Drive around in a kiddie car singing the batman theme song