Welcome Visitor: Login to the siteJoin the site

King Lear's guide to learing

Essay By: Mark Cuthbert III
Humor


Now...this was going to be titled "King Lear's things to be leary of" but I felt "guide to" sounded much more official. Plus it went with King Lear a little better. Plus I didn't think of why before I changed it I just did. I am a true rebel, a slumdog and I don't want to be a puppy. My brain is fat and here it comes again...

King Lear's things to be Leary of

aka

King Lear's Guide to Learning*

*Learning would be the active form of Leary. Oh what are you doing today King Lear? Well I'm Learing of course. Learing about the world, politics, religions, wives and kinsmen. You know the usual things I would be leary of accept now I've decided to do something about it. Good show.

Number 1 on the list.

Dentistry. Now, I am not striking out against denTISTS perse' I am merely stating my lear for the trade. I don't believe it is a trade at all, in fact a sham designed to keep us shelling out hard earned dollars on yet another useless inovation. Dentistry not only taste foul and just plain wrong...everything about dentistry seems wrong when your in the chair. So...how could it be right?

***I've had...ok this is not true...let me disclaim a moment, as for every act of learing comes a necessity for disclaiming. It's the give and take of the universe and we wouldn't want to set anything off balence now would we.***

****See all that disclaiming and I've forgotten just what it was I was disclaiming. Oh well, let it be known that I intended to disclaim my general leariness of Dentistry and wish no hard feelings about the subject. I was merely learing. I'm sure you'll understand.****

And another point! Teeth are known to grow back just like a broken bone, or a severed eyelid. (?) Teeth will grow back. Our bodies do that you know. If you have a tooth ache I suggest getting more greens in your diet as these are known to be key in building and rebuilding any kind of bone in the body. (no that is known as an organ) EVEN TEETH! will grow back if you apply my simple method.

A) start brushing with a natural clay/baking soda based toothpaste. This will help stop the rotting effect of regular toothpaste

B) eat more greens

C) cancel your next 3 dentist appointments

D) go to your fourth one just to catch their reaction. (priceless)

And there you have it, King Lear's guide to Learing tackles DENTISTRY.

-Cheers

KL



Submitted:Jan 19, 2010    Reads: 64    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   


Oh no..

I've posted it in the wrong box.

Please lord...let me slide just this once. I'll never do it again I promise..





0

| Email this story Email this Essay | Add to reading list



Reviews

About | News | Contact | Your Account | TheNextBigWriter | Self Publishing | Advertise

© 2013 TheNextBigWriter, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Terms under which this service is provided to you. Privacy Policy.