T.V. used to sell a machine called the multi-tool. It
was a saw, a drill-press, a sander, a lathe. It did the work of
six ordinary machines. Only problem was, it did none of them
well. So it's gone. It's history. But we've got something to take
its place. We got the cell-phone.
Of course they're not just phones. They're cameras, calculators,
stereos, and computers. They do none of them well. When friends
show me their latest -greatest cell-phone I have to just gush,
"Oh, how cool! A cell-phone and a calculator! Oh, and
it's a camera too, and a computer. How nice for you." That
usually takes care of it. But unfortunately there's more.
"Wow, so it texts too?" (why anybody wants to text anyone else is
beyond me. The keys are much too small) So I say,
"I love the pictures, got anymore?" (you have to be at just the
right angle to see it, and the screen is the size of a postage
stamp) Then I follow with,
"Oh, and it plays music too!?" (it sounds tinny at best, since
the speaker's the size of a fingernail) But I say,
"I really dig the base. Bump it Baby, bump it!" Then it
rings one of those God-awful-stupid custom rings and I have to
"Oh, a call for me?" (I can't quite make out what they're saying.
They can't quite hear me. But that's O.K. since the call was
users, take some advice. Get over yourself.