Hi, my name is Doug. That's "god" spelled backwards with a little bit of you wrapped up in it.
My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.
I have a cat. She would really like to meet you.
If you were a booger I'd pick you first.
If you were a chicken, you'd be impeccable.
If you were a laser, you'd be set on "stunning".
If you were a library book, I would check you out.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
I just sh*t my pants. Can I get into yours?
You're so hot, your a** is on fire.
If you were my sister/brother, incest would be cool.
May I have the distinguished honor and privilege of sitting next to you?
My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
I'm invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?
I've gotta thirst, baby, and you smell like my Gatorade.
Oh my god, I thought I was gay... then I met you.
Oh no, I'm choking! I need mouth to mouth, quick!
Ok, I'm here, what do you want for your next wish?
Shall we talk or continue flirting from a distance?
Smile if you want me
What is your favorite color? (Answer) Mine too!
What's a nice girl like you doing talking to a loser like me?
What's that on your face? Oh, must just be beauty.
Do you have 70 cents? (No) How 'bout 69?