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Just a few, though stupid, witty quips to end your day with a smile.


Submitted:Oct 26, 2013    Reads: 61    Comments: 1    Likes: 1   


~Teachers always tell us to follow our dreams, yet they never let us sleep in class.

~Mirrors can't talk... and lucky for you, they can't laugh, either!

~Bob: *glances at watch* Ooh, look at the time. Gotta go.

Jimmy: Why?

Bob: I have to go feed my baby turtles.

Jimmy: Aww, cute! Can I watch?

Bob: *heitates* Sure.

(Both walk over to Bob's house)

Jimmy: *gapes in disbelief as Bob feeds his baby sister... turtles for lunch*

~If #2 pencils are so great, then why are they #2?

~A little kid had to go to the bathroom really bad one day. But before he was dismissed to use the restroom, his teachers asked him to recite the alphabet. The kid took a deep breath. "A b c d e f g h I j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z!" The teacher looked confused. "Where's your 'p'?" she asked. "Running down my leg!" cried the little boy.

~Donald duck comic strips were once banned in some foreign country because Donald wasnt wearing any pants. Yeah, but what about Mickey, who practically never has a shirt on?!

~Three baby cows lived in a field with their mother. One day the first baby cow went, "Why is my name Rose?" Mama Cow replied, "When you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." Then the second baby cow went, "Why is my name Daisy?" Mama Cow replied, "When you were born, a daisy petal fell on your head." The third baby cow went, "AJSMDCFJDEVKRFVRRVMDNCHESBUHEIRI!!!" Mama cow shouted, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"

[I SHALL MAKE A SEQUEL SOON. Hope you enjoyed!]





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