"Auto Racing Made Simple"
A how-to video from the Berry Brothers
"Let's face it, we've all had the urge to go as fast as we can, head straight for a brick wall, and escape death by the burning-hot thread of rubber on the racing tires, your smoking brakes, and a few bolts that held together, this time. Whew, what a thrill, huh? You say no one ever helped you to understand racing? What a waste; you don't know what you're missing! You're missing out on the thrill you can get only get from racing your car and cheating the grim reaper. You're missing out on taking the checkered flag, being attacked by the beautiful women there to greet you as you pull your car, still flush with the excitement of knowing you kicked the a**es of some of the corporations who pay for and operate these throbbing beasts, into Victory Lane. Then you'll pop open a bottle of champagne and celebrate not only your victory, but the fact you're still alive until the next race, that is! We'll show you how to be aggressive without being pulled from your car and beat to a pulp by the driver of that racecar you just forced out of a position you just had to have. We'll show you harmless, yet effective ways to sabotage other drivers out of the race, such as sugaring their gas tank, or tampering with their brakes. After all, doesn't it stand to reason that your odds of winning are directly affected by the number of cars racing? Yes, getting away with cheating a little is the American way. Sit down with your child, watch this fun-filled yet entertaining and educational video, and show them it's not about them having fun in what they do, but it's the winning, at all costs!"