A Birthday Wish for the Nikster!
Nik, I understand it's your, what, 12th birthday? Well kid, your future stretches before you like a big pair of pants with an elastic waistband! No matter how much life (food) you eat, your elastic waistband will expand, and those pants will still fit! What? it's not your 12th birthday? See, just enjoy your youth, because all-too-soon you'll turn into a bitter, angry old man who can't even keep track of how old you are, or remember if he took his memory-improving medicine! So, before you begin the steep decline into dawdle-dumb, just enjoy it as long as you can remember it! Happy Birthday!