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Shitty Adventures of Douche Dude (The SADD Saga)

By: Andre Molina

Chapter 1, The SADD Saga begins...

Created by Justine Challis & Andre A. Molina
Story by Andre A. Molina & Justine Challis
Written by Andre A. Molina

Once upon a time, there was a man named Bob Douche. He was an ordinary guy by day, but by night He would transform into Douche Dude. No one knew why. No one knew how (not even me. Honestly, who turns into .....). He protects us through times of despair, or the Shit Times.

And this is where our story begins. Ex-lawyer Donald Shitebag is our villian. He is known as Captain Shitbag, after attempting to hypnotize his law firm into shitting in bags, because he thought people used too much water. He was fired, So he decided to take over the world and make everyone shit in bags, as well as shit themselves if they don't hav bags (holy shit! Its gonna smell!). With 20 followers, known as the turds, He sets out to take control of the planet.
"Captain Shitbag!" said the turd, "We have picked up radio waves from the satelite. Operation Lazer Shit is a go!"
"Alright Turd 1, Lets do this shit!" Said the captain.
The giant lazer in the middle of the {so secret no one can find it not even douche dude} shit covered laboratory shot lazer beams into the air, and for some very unrelated reason disappeared in the clouds. In seconds, every toilet in the world was turned into human eating living toilets. The president sat down that day to release the steak-burger he had for lunch(YAY! no president!). The pope was surprised when his toilet asked him if sunday was bingo night.
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed the captain.
"hahahahahahahahahahaha---
"Shut up!!!!" yelled the captain.
"Someone's losing something more than just their temper!"
And with these words, entered our heroe.
"Douche dude?" exclaimed Captain Shitbag, " How did you find my {so secret no one can find it not even douche dude} shit covered laboratory!"
There was silence as they stared in hate at one another.
"Besides the smell?" said Douche Dude, "Well, All you did was build your lab around a junkyard."
"I Shall defeat you, you douchebag!" yelled the captain.
And so began a very climatic fight, which seemed as if the douche dude was about to lose when finally he defeated the captain with his douchelazer (you dont wanna know what this means).
Toilets returned to normal (so did the president, waaaaa!).
Thanks Douche Dude! You saved us from shitting ourselves!

© Copyright 2014Andre Molina All rights reserved. Andre Molina has granted theNextBigWriter, LLC non-exclusive rights to display this work on Booksie.com.

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