But I wasn't Scared!
Let me tell you a little story, about a man named Bob,
just your average everyday working class slob.
Who lived out in the desert with his son and his wife,
surrounded by nature, now this was the life.
And in this land where the animals play,
there would come many visitors, every day.
Coyotes and rabbits, squirrels and hawks,
creepies and crawlies, out from under their rocks.
Now occasionally, as life would have it,
something would end up in the house for a visit.
I believe in live and let live, and what's mine is yours,
But my house is for us, and they belong outdoors.
So one day with family gathered around,
one very scary looking creature we found,
wandering around on the living room floor,
must have come in through a left open door.
Big and dark and hairy was he,
with eight legs and fangs and eight eyes to see.
A tarantula, across the floor he did scurry,
and the people around him sure got up in a hurry.
Now my brother and I sat and watched him come in,
and he looked over at me, and said with a grin,
"Go ahead, pick him up, you know he won't bite."
And everyone got quiet, would I do it? I might.
Now, I wasn't really scared, just cautious, you know,
but I wasn't really sure how well this would go.
So I got up with a groan, and bent down to say "Hi!
My name is Bob, how you doin, big guy?"
I put out my hand, a meet and greet, as it were,
and up my arm he did run, eight legs just a blur.
And onto my neck, right tight to my ear,
as if some spidery secret I needed to hear.
And I still wasn't scared, oh no, not a chance,
I just had this sudden urge to learn a new dance.
The spider jig, where you jump and you spin,
and you scream like a girl, let the fun begin!
Of course the dance was an instant hit,
I could tell by the way they all laughed at it,
But the spider wasn't thrilled as I channeled Astaire,
he just held on for dear life, all eight legs in my hair.
They say all good things must come to an end,
And I was ready to say goodbye to my spidery friend.
Somehow my feet had led me outside,
the tarantula happily along for the ride.
Into my trembling hand he did go,
back onto the ground, a little dizzy from the show.
And I turned to my family, and took a deep bow,
Said, "Well that was fun, so what do we do now?"