DOWN WITH HOMOPHONIA
I live in Lancashire born and bread
When I was a child I lived on bred
Parents I came from everybody nose
Due to the hideousness of my knows.
I bought my wife a 9-carrot wring
Grabbed my throat, my neck she did ring
Went for a burger that was full of mayor
Reported our grievances to the mare.
Failure in the sex I tried to illicit
Thoughts of affairs, much more elicit
I'm proud I've never been with a haw
Vital minerals I get from a whore.
Was thirty nine… now I've turned forte
To give up on life is not my forty
I dream of being a massive knob
Manner and door with a regal nob.
Musn't be stupid and pass the book
Listen to a story on my "Talking Buck"
I like nothing better than a bit of oral
Pardon me, I meant to say "aural".