TURN THE TV OFF!...OR YOU'LL BE JEREMY KYLED
Relaxation, to most, is being a blob
Strewn with tv on, "Ah that's just the job"
Few of the programmes improve intellect
Quickly that "off" button you must select.
"Escape to the Country?" - you'll need a packet!
Covetous cravings put you in a straight-jacket
There's more ham in "soaps" than piggy group sex
Leading to the rupture of your cerebral cortex!
Reading a book may relieve you of that frown
Taking a walk can prevent you feeling down.
A world exists outside television town
Turn off the sewerage or else in it you will drown.
You may say " Shut up - sometimes I'm stressed!"
"What's wrong with having nose in cushion firmly pressed?"
"It's great to get my feet up for the evening view"
May as well have lobotomy…or escape and make a brew.
Ant and Dec.....my artery I'll sever
"I'm a celeBRATy....Leave Me In Here Forever"
That rogue and scoundrel, Jeremy Vile
"Know-all"...know fuck-all...... disturbing style.
This is not relaxing! - it's degradation of the brain!
We all need to act - stem intellectual drain
The secret of chilling is to be wise with your time
Switch the tele off - make love or do a mime.
Play some stupid games like "pass the Persil"
Involve your kids when it comes to rehearsal
Beyond Noel Edmonds, imagination burgeons
To erase your grin you'll need plastic surgeons.
Exercise is helpful in relieving stress
Focus on problems when your life is in a mess
If all else fails and your mind is skewhiff
Final remedy is a strongly loaded spliff.
Eat well, sleep well, be positive of mind
Active, didactic, will help you unwind
If push comes to shove try taking medication
To escape "X-Factor" and the world of fabrication.
©Garry Croft June 2013.