Going Rollerskating

Going Roller Skating

I thought this would be a perfect blast,

roller-skating around the loop, and going so damn fast

As I was in junior high, I just had to look cool

I didn’t want to look like my usual uncoordinated fool,

so I dressed in my finest clothes, which included a wide,

white belt and bell-bottom pants, and I went inside

the skating rink, for the first time, ever

It was such a den of sin, that I had never

even seen some of the things happening.  I felt so out of place

But I boldly rented my skates, and put on a brave face

Loud, pulsating songs blasted in my ears,

and there were a s**t load of skaters, which added to my fears

But I was determined to act like I was having a great time

I just hoped my leg wouldn’t end up in a cast; I put on my

skates, and I hit the skating floor, making a beeline for the wall

Me, and several other dorks, were afraid that we would fall

So, instead of trying to skate, we must have looked

pathetic

What I’d heard to expect, turned out to be most accuretic--

err—accurate.  The older guys acted like rolling studs

The girls just totally ignored us duds

I finally got up enough nerve to leave the wall and skate

It was much easier than I’d first thought.  This was great!

Faster and faster I went, feeling like a pro

I skated by a group of girls and, “Oh no!”

One of the high school boy’s had just stuck out his leg

to trip me.  I saw the money I’d pitched in for a keg,

go for naught, as I desperately tried to swerve

Reflecting on it now, it really took some nerve

I could have flown through the air and broke my arm,

but as it turned out, only my pride was harmed

After I crashed to the ground in the middle of the floor,

I skated off as fast as I could to the door

Behind me, everyone was laughing, they thought it was funny

After that, I just stayed home and saved the money!