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"I Was Ego-Driven, But My Ego Blew Through a Stop Sign!"

Poetry By: Mike Stevens

Offensive driving!

Submitted:Apr 28, 2013    Reads: 15    Comments: 5    Likes: 2   

"I Was Ego-Driven, But My Ego Blew Through a Stop Sign!"

"Step out of the car, hands where I can see them!"

"What seems to be the problem, officer?"

"Like you don't know; didn't you see that stop sign back there?"

"Oh, I guess I saw it, but I ignored it; do you know who I am?"

"You ignored it? Would you ignore a crosswalk in a school zone

Too? And aren't you the egotistical jerkweed who's

About to receive a ticket for being too dense?"

"No, I'm an important writer."

"Never heard of you, sir."

"Well, I am, and I would have stopped like a regular guy,

But I'm not normal!"

"Boy, don't I know it!"

"You see, your little rules don't apply to me;

I've got big topics to write about."

"Well, you can start by writing you name in cursive

Next to the X, by where it says 'offender'."

"Surely, you can't be serious."

"Is the ghost of Leslie Nielson in the car with you?"

"Come on, Officer, there must be a way for me

To avoid this ticket?" "Well, sir, too bad you had the total

Lack of good judgement to let your ego drive; he's terrible,

Have a good day, sir, and obey ALL traffic laws."


15 minutes later, after driving in silence,

Mike's ego says, "Can I drive again, please?"

"Shut up!"


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