(A Twisted Fairytale)
Goldilocks was a terrible child
She gave all the townsfolk hell
Always going in their houses
Since she was the Mayor's daughter
They let it slide grudgingly
They knew payback was forthcoming
In the woods lived 3 bears
Mama bear, Papa bear and Teenage bear
One morning sitting down to eat their breakfast
Of rutabagas, carrots and potatoes
They all exclaimed at once, "too hot!"
So off they went for a walk
Meanwhile Goldilocks looking for devilment
Came upon the little house in the woods
"Ooh," said Goldi, "I wonder who lives here?"
She went inside, following her nose
She saw the 3 plates of food on the table
She sat in the big chair and tried the rutabagas
"Eww, nasty," "yuck what is this?"
So she sat in the medium chair, trying the carrots
"Boring," who would eat this junk?
Finally sat in the little chair and ate the potatoes all up
"Now that was some good eats," she said
"I'm so tired, I'll take a nap"
She went up the stairs, nosing around
Jumped in the biggest bed, messing up the covers
"Nah., this bed is too hard on my delicate self"
She jumped in the medium sized bed, throwing the covers on the floor
"Oh my god, this just won't do, too lumpy"
So she jumped in the little bed, and said, "Ah"
She even put on the little nightgown
Soon she fell sound a sleep
By now the bears hungry, started home
Upon opening the door, they knew someone had been there
Papa went to his plate, "someone played in my rutabagas!"
Mama went to her plate, "someone mashed my carrots!"
Teenager went to her plate, "someone ate all my potatoes!"
So off they went to investigate the rest of the house
They went upstairs and crept quietly to the bedroom
Papa said, "someone's been in my bed and messed the covers up"
Mama said, "someone's been in my bed and threw the covers on the floor"
Teenager said, " Oh hell no," "someone's still in my bed!"
And the bitch is wearing my nightgown!
Papa said, "I'll go get my big knife"
Mama said, "I'll get the big pot boiling"
Teenager said, "I'll get more vegetables to go with the meat!"
September 16, 2006 (11:00pm)