Everybody thinks I'm weird because I only eat lard.
The doctors tell me that my arteries are getting hard.
I don't consume vegetables, fruits, bread or meat.
People call me crazy because lard is all that I eat.
My days of eating lard will never come to an end.
Why do I have so much trouble keeping friends?
When people see me, they always laugh.
Then they beat me on the ass with a staff.
My sister denies that we're related because I served her lard instead of steak.
Stop laughing at me dammit, i've had all that I can take!