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The Cullen's Relocate

Short story By: kidarox123
Humor



Why the Cullen's had to relocate to forks. (a/n: i did not write this, my friend did.)


Submitted:Dec 6, 2008    Reads: 351    Comments: 9    Likes: 2   


How the Cullens Moved to Forks

Jasper POV

Carlise said we had to get jobs. We were living in Oklahoma. Emmet was working in Canada, with a four minute running commute, he was working at a sports store. Alice was was working for Holister, Edward was working at the blood bank... that could end badly, and Rose was working as a model. And you know where I wound up?

Burger King.

I have so much more potential than this. Sitting in a drive thru taking orders from random people I really don't care about and frankly want to eat. I'm getting sort of thirsty. Maybe Edward could bring me some blood... hmmmm. Stupid Edward with the stupid job.

"Welcome to burger king, can I take you're order?" i asked Or you're blood.

"Uh, no you can't"

"EMMETT!" i yelled. Him and his stupid day off, and he uses it to annoy moi. IT was the third time he'd done that in four minutes. The manager came in ,

"Do we have a problem Mr. Hale?" I thought on this and then said,

"Yeah, my crackpot brother keeps driving up and when I ask if I can take his order he says no and drives away." The manager, who's name was Wyane Dwop said

"Oh well tell you're crackpot brother that drugs are bad, ok? And uh, this wasn't in the hand book."

"Is someone eating you in the hand book?" I asked standing up and walking towards him.

" Wait, What?" he asked backing away real slow like. I smirked and said,

"Is someone eating and or drinking you in the hand book?" He backed away some more.

"N-no it isn't." Wayne Dwop stuttered.

"It should be, or you shouldn't hire dead people." I said said mysteriously lunging foreward and sinking my teeth into his arm and draining him of all blood. Then I announcced to the store over the intercome system,

"Uh, there's a dead person back here." And then I vampire ran back to the Cullen/Hale headquarters. Carlise was sitting in the living/dead room, reading the paper.

"Uh, Carlise, dude, uh we need to relocate ASAP." He put the paper down and asked me what I had done.

"I ate manager." I confessed and then sent him calming waves. I smiled, "Emmett made me."

"How did your brother make you do this?" Carlise asked.

"Well I was sort of bored 'cause and he kept bugging me while I was working and then i was getting thirsty. And he was really ticking me off and then Wayne Dwop was being all manager like, and it wasn't in the hand book!" I said stupidly. Alice came in the door.

"Why do I see us moving to a nowhere place called Forks?" She demanded. "I'm working for Hollister you know? There is no Holister in Forks!"

And then Rosalie came in doing the macarena singing "Like a model, HEY, wearing all the holister clothes!"

Alice broke down crying at the mention of Hollister. "Jasper how could you?" she sobbed, though she couldn't acctually cry.

And then Edward came hom from the blood bank saying "Yeah, we sorta need to relocate..."

THE END





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