Inspector Jimmy of Scotland Yard: The Case of the Missing Pizza
By Mike Stevens
A Jimmy Tilford Tale
10 year old Jimmy Tilford was so looking forward to the left over slice of pepperoni pizza in the refrigerator; left over from last night's dinner. Pizza was dang near his favorite food; well, hamburgers, hot dogs, spaghetti, tacos, corn dogs, ice cream, and cookies ranked right up there too, but pizza was at the top of his list! He ran down the stairs as soon as he awoke, and went to the refrigerator and looked in. He wanted to see what he'd be having for lunch; only it was gone. Jimmy frantically search behind the pickles, but to no avail; it was gone; somebody in this house had stolen his lunch! He himself had no idea who, but Inspector Jimmy could find out:
The phone rang at Inspector Jimmy's office, where the he was playing Battleship verses himself, and Inspector Jimmy reluctantly pried his eyes away from the 1/2-sunk submarine and answered,
"Inspector Jimmy; I solve mysteries, great and small!"
That was the slogan Jimmy had come up with; pretty cool, huh?
"Yes, hello Inspector Jimmy; I have a great big mystery I'd like you to solve; someone stole the last slice of the yummy pepperoni pizza I WAS going to have for lunch; I'd like you to crack the case."
"I see; have no fear, you'll be eating that yummy pepperoni pizza for lunch!"
"I don't know, Inspector Jimmy; it sound pretty hopeless!" said his intrepid assistant, Sharecrop Shelter, upon learning of the new case.
"My dear Sharecrop, it may seem hopeless, but not for Inspector Jimmy; I'll have this solved in time for lunch!"
The way Inspector Jimmy saw it, only two suspects could have done it; his older brother Tim, who didn't live with them; highly unlikely; or his mom. Inspector Jimmy decided to begin his investigation with her. Into the living room he went, where his mom sat reading the paper, looking innocent as could be!
"Mom, there was a slice of pizza I--err--a client was saving for lunch,
The fact this was supposed to be for a client (that this client must live somewhere else) almost didn't even cross Jimmy's mind until it was too late; he was THAT focused!
and it's missing; what do you know about that?"
"That's Inspector Jimmy miss!"
"Well, INSPECTOR Jimmy, all I know is that it was there last night."
Inspector Jimmy and Sharecrop Shelter exchanged glances, and he replied, "Can anyone verify this?"
"Jimmy; sorry, INSPECTOR Jimmy; there was no one except you, your father, and me here at dinner; who else could have witnessed it?"
"Ah, ha; no witnesses; how convenient!" She had stolen the missing slice; the LAST slice! "Tell me mom, was it good?"
"Was what good?"
"The last slice of pizza that YOU stole!"
"Jimmy, what are--"
"That's INSPECTOR Jimmy, if you please!"
"JIMMY, what are you accusing me of? Taking the last slice of pizza and lying about it?"
At the same time he was daydreaming this, his father came in the front door, "Honey, I'm home for lunch. All I had for breakfast was a cold slice of pizza, and I'm starved!"
Oh; "Mom, I've eliminated you as a suspect!"
He'd fogotten that he was only daydreaming, and that she would have no idea what he'd been thinking; oops!