Random First Lines: The Cat WalkChapter 5.Where am I?" I asked, confused."You were knocked out dear, by the force of the ground. His... : Horror » Read

Welcome Visitor: Login to the siteJoin the site

She's Angry, He's Clueless #3

Short Story By: Tesseth
Humor


True Story! 3rd in Series. Relationship "drama". View table of contents...

 

Submitted: Dec 10, 2006    Reads: 229    Comments: 10    Likes: 1   


Come on! This is disgusting!

All I wanted was a nice relaxing shower. A moment of peace.

I've vacuumed, mopped, dusted, did dishes, the laundry, wiped every counter, sink, & toilet...I did the bills, made the kid's doctor's, dentist, haircuts, & orthodontist appointments... I did the grocery shopping AND made every meal for everyone in this house today.

Like I said, all I wanted was a nice relaxing shower. I think I deserve it. A few minutes without a dog following me around for a treat, a few minutes without scrubbing, wiping, or picking up, a moment alone??? I mean, I don't even get to pee alone...I'm with our toddler all day...the door's always open...he follows me, he watches, he plays in the dog's water, he hands me the toilet paper! I love everyone but, I just want to take a shower, all by myself, with no chores, no responsibilities. Is that too much to ask?

But, wait was is this?
What do we have here?
Is this a dead kitten in the drain?

He knows damn well I can not stand hair...HIS hair in particular.
You know there's cat hair, there's dog hair,...they DO need a good brushing, that would help. But, I can't exactly expect them to clean up their own hair.
But, HIS hair? HIS HAIR? Yes, I really do expect he could take care of this ONE thing himself.

Am I alone here? Please tell me that I am not the only woman completely & totally frustrated & disgusted by this???

Yes, I've tried to ask nicely. "Dear, when you are finished in the shower could you please take care of the drain?"  Oh, but, wait...sometimes he does "take care of it".  Except, it doesn't quite reach a trash can.  He will actually pick the hairball from the drain & deposit it on the edge of the tub.  Yep.  There it will sit.  There, he wiped out the drain didn't he?

I mean really, he doesn't have a whole helluva lot of responsibilities in this house...this ONE thing can't possibly be that difficult, can it?

To top it off, he knows I have to clean it up. I can't leave it there. I'm not only compelled to clean it up, I HAVE to! It will scare the children!!! It will. It's happened before. Our daughter will get to the bathroom before I do, she'll get her towel & clothes ready, she leans down, whips open the shower curtain to go for the knobs and "UHHH! What is that? MOMMMMM!!!" I hurry to her but, I already know what's freakin her out....the "dead kitten" on the edge of the tub!   

Yea, and it's not just the "drain kitten"...there's hairs splattered all over the shower walls, curtain, and don't get me started about the floor! After just ONE of his showers you can walk into the bathroom & ta-dah! you've got yourself some slippers.

Is this anything like the cat's bringing the mice to the front door? Is this like "oooo, look what I did. Aren't you proud of me?" Good Lord, no man, it looks as though you couldn't possibly have any hair left. It can't be growing as fast as it's coming out!

Or, is this like "marking his territory"? Just in case I try to have any men over while the baby's nappin, they'll surely go use the bathroom and back right out sayin, "whoa, no sir, I see one very manly man must live here...I have to leave!"

Oh, and as for "His side" here?
He showers,
turns off the water and shakes off like a dog,
steps out shakes some more,
scratches,
rubs,
...and bitches that there's a hair in the hairbrush!

 


1

Email this story Email this story | Print Story Print Story | Add to reading list

Comments:

You would think they'd be bald by now.
But the dog spawns little kittens under the hutch,bed and every corner of the house and shows not even the slightest hint of thinning.
They might be related.
Napping habits are the same, come to think of it, they eat alot alike too. If he cocks his leg on the couch, can I smack him with the broom?

Posted: Dec 17, 2006

Author Comment:

Yes!
Very funny Tyme!
I always appreciate your feedback.

Tesseth:

Someone who is going by the name of "stevie", on Booksie, may be copying your work/poems and presenting them as his/her own. Under slightly different titles with some slight variation in the verse.

What is interesting about this is that many of the same comments on your same poems also show up there as well. Something for you to investigate and to get in touch with Sol Nasisi(at Booksie) and about which he should have an interest. contact@booksie.com

Is this person you? If so, are you now reissuing your work under another Booksie author "name"? If so, then could you tell me how I might do it as well? For me it would be for the purpose separating, categorizing and grouping my work by theme and/or subject matter.

Hope everything is and goes well.

Happy trails,

Ed Bradley.

Posted: Jan 29, 2007

Author Comment:

Yes. I decided that I would rather seperate my more 'sensual' writing under a different penname. #1 because of the 1st penname I chose (then can't change! Otherwise I would've), #2 because it is almost a different well, alter ego kind-of thing, and #3 perhaps my 'regular' work would be read by a different 'audience' than the other more 'sensual' stuff... I should've thought of it from the moment I stepped into the 'sensual' category. So, yes, you need a 2nd email address to log-in again under a new penname...whether that's frowned upon or not, I'm not certain, but since we are unable to change our original name, I thought this would be fine. Thanks Mr Bradley!

This is very good, really gets you involved. Its written in a way that you can almost relate, or be there yourself. That is awesome. I like the description "dead kitten", very creative.

Posted: Feb 7, 2007

Author Comment:

lol Thank you very much! Couples 'arguments' can be pretty amusing when you're standing on the outside watching & listening...though the ones involved are SO serious!

Another amusing episode...although not much sympathy for the man's pov. Interesting remarks about territoriality, I think so many of our habits are prescribed by long hidden instincts that civilisation (and wifes...) unsuccessfully try to repress.

Keep up the good work! What is the pen name for your "more sensual" writing?

Posted: Feb 15, 2007

Author Comment:

Thank you for commenting Jeremy. Yes, sorry, didn't have much patience for the 'man's' perspective with this one, huh? As far as the 'habits' & territoriality & hidden instincts ... I really like to try to believe that 'men' aren't doing these things for any other reason than cluelessness...but, I could be soooo wrong. (p.s. check under erotica...my 'style' is the same...just with a different 'rating' level). Thanks for reading & commenting...I need to check out some of your writing.

Hi

This comment is pure spam. I haven't been on site here for ages because I think critiquecircle.com is superior. However I have new work here and I'm crappily fishing for hits. And nits.

PS you owe me thousands of comments!

x Nick

Posted: Apr 13, 2007

Author Comment:

Do I? Ok...no problem. I have been sick and haven't been here for a bit. I'm trying to catch up on my comment replying, my favorite author's new writing (YOU included! Gush, gush.), and some of the new author's 'new writing'. I'll be checking on your stuff soon, I promise, you've really got me curious now! YOU are such the character! lol

well--lol--that's just cuter than a bugs ear--never thought to write a story about it--but you did and I like it....missed this one somehow--very 5 star--I just have to share this with my married daughters ! I know they can relate :)

Posted: Jul 12, 2007

Author Comment:

Thanks Z! Yeah, I like these. I need to re-work them all and then get to adding more to them! I've used several people/couple's "issues" for the concepts of the stories. Always more ideas/"issues" that I can start putting together.
Thanks for checking in Z! Have a great day (it's been BEAUTIFUL outside so, I haven't been on the computer too much lately)! Take care.

LOL! There's a cure for the dead kitten in the drain. It's called "Scalp Med". The good news is that you could take all that hair and knit it into a winter hat. It'll help him replace all the hair he's losing! (Recycling is good for the environment!) This story had me laughing from the beginning. Keep up the good work!

Posted: Jul 12, 2007

Author Comment:

Thank you very much Quickpaws!
The recycle idea is great---IF I could stand to touch it---yuck! Hair & fingernail clippings...gross me out!!! lol
Thanks for the great comment!

Great Story!

Posted: Mar 29, 2008

Author Comment:

Thank you very much!
I need to add to this "series" :)

I learned a long time ago that there are things that you do in the shower and there are things that you don't do in the shower. I was doing all the wrong things except for washing.

Posted: Nov 18, 2008

Author Comment:

:)
Cute!
Thanks for reading & commenting!



Add Your Comments:

Your Name:

Spam protection control::

© Copyright 2009 Tesseth All rights reserved. Tesseth has granted theNextBigWriter, LLC non-exclusive rights to display this work on Booksie.com.

Add to Reading List
Become a fan
Email this story Email this story
Read/Write Reviews Read/Write Reviews
Print Story Print Story



Other writing by Tesseth She's Angry, He's Clueless #2 The Process Alone That Place Soul Tug of War More..



Tags

Love, Poetry, Death, Life, Poem, Romance, Pain, Fantasy, Sad, Hope, Sex, Horror, Hate, God, War, Hurt, Sadness, Loss, Dark, Humor, Fiction, Depression, Heart, Family, Friendship.

About | News | Contact | Your Account | TheNextBigWriter | Advertise

© 2008 TheNextBigWriter, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Terms under which this service is provided to you. Privacy Policy.