" 15 Things I Found Humorous In Prison "
By: GUY ZAPPULLA
Having lived in one prison or another for close to two decades I can't help but
look back at a few of the humorous and in some instances not so humorous things
I have seen.
Sitting in the prison yard watching someone getting "Hock" spit on for 62 consecutive
days. And the spitee enjoyed the attention.
Someone starting a harmless snowball fight then putting a rock inside one of the
Wiping a lit cigarette across the urinal, then throwing it on the ground knowing
some fiend was going to pick it up and smoke it thinking it was just we lipped.
Watching a guy bench press 500 pounds, only to then see him tie his shirt up in a knot
and sashay away as though he was in heels.
Intentionally spilling coffee on the stairs in the winter just to watch it instantly freeze
so the next group coming out slips in unison landing in a pile.
Waiting for an avalanche to come off the 100 foot roof and clobber a guy. And not tell
him its about to fall.
Bringing extra large live roaches into the mess hall to run free across the table and the
people next to you.
Holding in gas for what seems like forever, just to let it loose as you're being frisked
by a C.O. "SSSSSSSssss"
Putting Saran wrap on someone's toilet bowl I won't say who it is, but most of you
reading this probably heard of the guy and yes he pissed on everything including
Putting Peanut Butter on the handle of someone's cell door, then after they close it
watch as they casually smell their hand.
Putting Bengay in someone's boxers while they're in the shower, then watching
them do a combination of a salsa while power walking back to their cell.
Lighting someone's feet on fire as they slept. Of course then yelling FIRE.
Putting a lit cigar in someone's back pocket as they're going up the stairs, before
they realize their ass is on fire they always try to scratch it first.
Putting baby powder under someone's pillow case. Then watching them go to
breakfast looking like the "Stay Puff " marshmellow man from " Ghostbusters ".
Making "Meta Mucil " pancakes complete with chocolate Exlax melted on top.
Yes they really do taste like chocolate and really isn't to bad with syrup.
But at the first "Bubble" its an issue.
" The Grossest 15 things I have seen in prison " Coming Soon...