"Hey―what are you doing in here?"
"A little steamin', a little boilin', a little bakin'…"
"Um … I'm afraid I don't understand."
I'm fixing Thanksgiving dinner."
"You are? But … you're a turkey."
"Yes sir, I am indeed."
"So … what's for dinner? Not a …"
"Turkey? Oh no, of course not. We're having chicken."
"Chicken? Who the Hell ever heard of chicken for Thanksgiving?"
"You have, now. And frankly, I don't give a shit—on Thanksgiving, it's every bird for them-fuckin'-selves!"
-Harlowe Pilgrim
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