Cuts to Dr Jamie
Stevens brushing his teeth looking in mirror.
Jamie! Jamie! Come here!
What? (Louder) If you've knocked over my syringes again just pick
them up without seeing what happens when you use
Nick: No it's
Nick: That girl
from last night!
stolen my wallet!
Jamie: Oh you
idiot. Well what was she called maybe we can at least call the
Nick: Oh her
name...umm...it was... it was something like...no wait I've got
Jamie: You don't
know do you.
Nick: Yeah! It
was (quietly so Jamie can't hear mutters something)
Nick: Ok I don't
know. But still I would've if she hadn't spiked my drink.
Jamie: Nick as
normal I heard you stumble through the door at half two last
night and you sounded exactly the same as always. You were just
Nick: No I
wasn't. No I wasn't because I remember her putting a white powder
in my drink.
Jamie: What? Why
the hell did you drink it then?
Nick: She said
it was a sweetener and you know my policy on drinks these
Make all drinks as sweet as possible.
Nick: Yeah and
you can't exactly carry around sachets of sugar with you all the
time, anyway you weren't exactly sober when you came home.
Jamie: Yeah but
I came home at eleven and I wasn't totally wasted. Uh I don't
have time for this! I'm already late. That stupid bat Mrs Smith
is still convinced keeping her husband alive is a good
happening with her again?
Jamie: I'll tell
you later I've got to go. Knowing that bastard of a bus driver
he'll probably drive off the moment I walk up to it.
Nick: See you
running out the door) Bye!
out of bus window can see behind him there is a group of school
girls about 15 one starts choking on lolly getting louder
quickly. Jamie turns around.
Jamie: Whoa get
out of the way I'm a doctor.
Man: No I'm
doctor I can help. (Looks a little weird, staring)
Girls give the
choking girl to the man rather than Jamie
Jamie: Hey I'm
the doctor, where do you even work?
wouldn't know it. Just let me do it I know the heimlin
It's called the Heimlich manoeuvre not the heimlin. You're not a
doctor at all!
Man: Yes I am
I'm just forgetful. (Can barely be heard for choking)
One of the
girls: Hey just one of you do something will you!
right! You're just some pervert aren't you! You'll be lucky if I
don't ring the police. Girls just let me do it.
Man: How dare
Jamie does the
Heimlich manoeuvre and the girl finally stops choking.
Jamie: Are you
alright now? And you, you should be ashamed, I'll let you off
this once if you get out of here right now you perv.
The man holds
out identification badge. Jamie looks shocked and
Man: I am Dr
Matthews one of the best doctors in Britain! In fact I make most
of the decisions for which people get promotions! You
Stevens. I work umm in a lower position than that. (Coughs) Well
I'll be getting off, this is my stop.
One of the
girls: We're in the middle of nowhere.
well, this is me.
Where do you work?
Jamie walks in
stops at reception.
Ruby: You're a
bit late aren't you? Late by about 2 hours actually.
Jamie: I know I
know. Where's Mrs Smith I guess she'll be anxious to keep her
husband in pain.
Ruby: Yeah she's
just in the waiting room. By the way the doors are done.
Jamie: Ok good
so, wait just a second what doors?
Ruby: You know
how you wanted room 7 and 8's doors switched.
Jamie: What? I
didn't ask for that. Why would I want that?
Ruby: I don't
know but you rang me at about half past ten last night and told
me to do it.
Jamie: I was
drunk then! I didn't mean it!
Ruby: Well I
didn't know! Although it was a bit weird you started crying, and
then laughing, and then burped loudly while you told me to do it.
Also you kept referring to my chest.
Jamie: I didn't
mean it! So what room 8 is now 7 and 7 is now 8?
for a moment) yes.
Right so Mr Smith is now in room 7 rather than 8 and Mr Jackson
is in 8 rather than 7.
great that'll make my job much easier.
Walks to waiting
immediately gets up and runs to him.
hello Mrs Smith! (Taken aback) Don't you have a strong scent
Mrs Smith: Where
have you been! Edward has been in pain all morning while you were
off probably helping a boy with a graze.
Jamie: No I was
helping a girl with a lolly. Anyway Mrs Smith let me just talk
you through the procedure one more time.
Mrs Smith: I
know what will happen. You've told me already.
Jamie: Well let
me tell you one more time just to have one last crack at making
you not do this.
Mrs Smith: You
want me to kill my husband?!
Jamie: No! Just
listen! If you are still with the idea then we will carry on
paying to keep your husband alive. However, he will be
unconscious until he dies, he will die eventually, and he will be
in more and more pain every day until he dies. Yet you want this
Mrs Smith: If it
means keeping him alive then yes.
Jamie: Right. We
will send off the money for more equipment to keep him living in
pain. Utter pain. Endless pain.
Mrs Smith: I
can't help but feel like you almost want him to die now!
picked up on that did you?
Mrs Smith: I'm
sorry but I just feel that killing him won't do anyone any good.
I mean will killing anyone do any good?
I could think of one right now.
Jamie: I said I
think I will order the equipment now.
Mrs Smith: Oh
good. Oh and by the way are there any other tea's I'm getting a
little tired of twinnings.
confused. Stares at her for a second and then speaks.
Jamie: Well Ruby
what else do I have to do today? Maybe jumping off a
understanding so says confused) No. But you have to operate on a
Who's he? I've never even heard of him never mind operated on
Ruby: Yeah well
he wants someone else to operate on him because he's obsessed
with the idea Dr Hughes is the devil.
Ruby: Dr Hughes
asked him if he wanted to borrow his Brokeback Mountain
Jamie: What? Ugh
why do we get all the weird old freaks in this hospital?
with her head towards approaching girl) she's the opposite of all
Jamie: Do I know
Ruby: Why are
you asking me? It's not like I know what's happening in your life
constantly, I mean it would be quite interest-
(Interrupting) Are you Dr Stevens?
(coughing to make his voice normal) Ye-yes I am Dr
Girl: Hi I just
wanted to say thanks about earlier.
Girl: Yeah when
you saved me and accused that other guy of being a perv.
Jamie: Ah yes
well actually it turns out he was a professional doctor that
could decide whether to promote or demote me so if you didn't
tell anyone else I would really be grateful.
Girl: He was
still a perv whether he was a doctor or not. Oh by the way my
Jamie: Oh right.
Well um thanks for the, thanks but it's just my job so you
Candice: But I
Candice: (In a
flirty voice) Yeah. Is there anywhere we can go to be alone I
need to talk about something with you.
Jamie: Oh I
don't think so I mean-
there's the supplies room just there (pointing to a room
at Ruby angrily) that's only really for staff though.
Candice: Well I
could pretend to be a nurse, got any outfits?
Jamie: No, just
um no. I think talking would be a bad idea.
Ruby: What about
that room that's going to be built into a new waiting
clenched jaw) Thanks so much Ruby.
Go in room it's
Jamie: So the
going to be honest; I wasn't planning on doing much
Jamie: Really? I
would never have guessed.
(Smiles) I just couldn't stop thinking about the bus, how you
Jamie: Well I
wouldn't really call it rescuing, you know it's just my job, all
in a day's work-
close to him
Candice: Oh no,
you were my superman, the warmth of your body against mine, the
feeling of your breath on my neck.
Jamie: I never
thought of it to be such a romantic um manoeuvre.
him but Jamie pulls away
Jamie: Look I'm
sorry but this is not going to happen, you're 15 and I'm, well
Candice: Oh go
on how old are you? I bet you're less than 10 years older than
Jamie: No a bit
more I'm afraid so why don't you leave and we won't talk about
this again yeah?
Ruby: Dr Stevens
I thought you had to (looks at them and raises eyebrows) oh sorry
I'll come back in 10 minutes? How long do you need?
Jamie: No time
at all Candice was just leaving. Shouldn't you be in school
Candice: Oh yeah
I'm going to miss being with you to learn about some gay German
guy? We're a couple we can't be apart.
when were we even a couple!
Mrs Smith enters
and sees the scene
(Jamie tries to interrupt throughout) Oh I see! Decide to take an
advantage of a young girl rather than order the equipment that's
needed to keep my husband alive!
that's not it at all-
me just how is he taking advantage of me? I'm his
Jamie: No you're
Mrs Smith: She's
only a child!
Candice: How am
I a child?
Jamie: I don't
even know her!
know it's so typical of an old bag like you to have a go at
Mrs Smith: How
Candice: Oh I
dare very well thanks.
Mrs Smith: You
need a good slap!
need a punch you ancient cow! (Mrs Smith looks shocked) Come on
me and you outside! I could knock you out in seconds.
Jamie: Well she
is old; it wouldn't exactly be a contest.
Jamie: What? Oh
so when I'm trying to help you can't stop talking but when I'm
slightly insulting you go to silence.
Ruby: Jamie, a
child, just brought in from a car accident.
Ruby: I tried to
Jamie: No you
didn't you said how long do you need!
Mrs Smith: I am
going home and I am taking Edward with me.
Candice: And how
the hell are you going to do that? He's going to die soon.
Candice go home or to school or to where ever you're supposed to
be, I don't love you or know you. Mrs Smith I will order the
parts right now, and Ruby take me to this child.
didn't like you anyway, you (thinks) rapist!
quizzically at her
Enter into an
emergency room there is a child on bed holding arm there is a man
standing over him
Jamie: Excuse me
I need to see him.
The man turns
around; it's Dr Matthews.
Dr Matthews: Ah
Dr Stevens, are you going see my child or just accuse me of being
a paedophile again?
Jamie: I didn't
actually call you a paedophile I called you a pervert (Dr
Matthews looks angrily at him) but hey that's in the past (laughs
nervously) so let's take a look at the little guy.
Dr Matthews: He
is called Peter and he is my son so you take good care of
definitely I mean these hands are hands of...pleasure (notices
what he just said and smile fades) ok let's take a look.
Jamie takes out
a torch and shines it in his eye.
Peter: Why are
you looking at my eye? It's my arm that hurts you tit.
Jamie can't hide
his surprise at this.
Jamie: (Aware of
Dr Matthews behind him) Well I need to make sure you don't have a
Peter: No you're
supposed to check the injured bit of the body first even I know
aren't you the little doctor but I think I'll keep to my own
methods because I think I have a tiny bit more experience than
Peter: Ask my
Jamie: Oh I'm
sure he agrees with me, don't you Dr Matthews.
Just get on with it.
Jamie: Can you
move your arm for me?
Peter: Yes but
it hurts that's the reason I'm here you dick.
you a little angel. Well let's x-ray just to make sure.
Peter's arm and Peter shouts in pain.
Jamie: Oh I am
sorry, I slipped. (Speaks into microphone on the table) Ruby
could you get this little shit an x-ray please?
Dr Matthews and
Peter stare at him.
Jamie: What? I
said this little wit, because he's so witty!
looks at him angrily as Ruby enters.
the little shit?
Jamie: I said
Ruby: No you
Jamie: Ok why
don't you just take him to the x-ray room?
Ruby: Ok fine by
the way Mrs Smith wants you.
Jamie: Oh god!
What now, is Edward too bloody cold?!
Jamie: Oh it's
just a man who's going to die soon and the wife is being a bit
Dr Matthews: I
hope I never see you again. (Walks away)
you old bastard.
Mrs Smith: There
Jamie: Where did
you expect me to be? I think the moon's a little full at the
Mrs Smith: Why
would you want to be there?
Jamie: No reason
Mrs Smith: So
Jamie: Going to
order them right after lunch.
Mrs Smith: What?
You still haven't got them?
Mrs Smith: Well
why after lunch?
the place we ring has a lunch break just like me right
Jamie: Yep so
I'll get them after ok?
Nick and Jamie
are in a coffee shop eating lunch
so how's your day been so far?
Jamie: Well same
old, same old you know the usual, 15 year old coming on to me,
Mrs Smith being wonderfully stubborn and Dr Matthews kid turns
out to be a fantastic little boy.
Matthews? 15 year-old? Stubborn?
Jamie: Oh Dr
Matthews I accused him of being a perv on the bus and he turned
out to be a very successful doctor. Candice who I was stopping
him help on the bus turned up later and came on to me, and what
do you mean stubborn?
Nick: I mean
what does that mean?
Jamie: Oh it
means um not letting me have my own way if you know what I
Nick: Oh I get
Nick: No but
anyway what about this girl? Could she be the one?
Jamie: What! No
of course not; I don't know her at all, and she's only 15! I
could be her Dad for God's sake. Anyway why are you so
Nick: Oh I uh
just met someone.
who is the lucky girl?
Nick: Well her
name's Jenna. I met her down that alleyway by the take
what you were both just walking down there?
Nick: No I was
driving and I um picked her up.
she's not homeless if she? I mean I have nothing against the
homeless but they're just so disgusting.
you'll be glad to know she was a prostitute not a homeless
Jamie: What the
hell! A prostitute? Are you crazy! Where is she now? You haven't
left her in the flat have you? Oh she'll be touching my
Nick: If you
must know yes, she is at home but she isn't a prostitute.
anymore she's not. After a very romantic afternoon and some sex
she decided to get a job if she could stay with me.
Jamie: Did it
not occur to you she could be lying so she can steal our things
or get your money or I don't know what else but something else
Nick: No I trust
her; I mean she doesn't seem like one of those anulrexic hookers
you see at night she seems trustworthy like a Prescott or
Anulrexic? Prescott? Do you mean anorexic and escort?
the point is she seems like a girlfriend.
Jamie: I don't
know. You make sure she doesn't settle in until I get home
Anyway are you sure this Candice actually did come on to you? Did
she just say thanks or something?
Jamie: Look you
ask Ruby, believe me that's not the normal thanks I get from
helping people and if it is I'm definitely not helping Mrs
Imagine her old flaps all over you.
please I'm eating.
Nick: It's sick
though, you know once my mate did it with a 60 year old and he
was only 17, it must've been like having sex with the Queen,
which might sound sick but really I bet a lot of men fantasize
Jamie just looks
Jamie: Who was
this mate anyway?
Are you serious? Who the hell is he?
remember Helga's party?
Jamie: Of course
how could I forget the look on her face when all your mates
flashed at her from her conservatory?
Nick: Yeah that
was a fun night; a bit unfortunate Helga had to be taken to the
hospital after Sir Urethra licker shit in her soup.
Jamie: Oh my God
you told me it was just unprepared!
Nick: Yeah but
you would've never taken the blame if I had told you that was
what actually happened.
obviously but I prepared the soup, and I told the doctor as well,
oh no wonder he left when I got a job there.
Nick: Yeah, well
anyway Wunka was one of them. You know Sir Urethra licker wasn't
the only one, guess what Wunka did in it!
Jamie is seen
walking along the street with his hands in his pockets when a
woman wearing a bright green coat and bright red tight trousers
bumps into him.
remember me don't you!
Jamie: I see a
lot of people every day I don't remember faces too well.
Alice. (Jamie shakes his head) You had the job interview with
Jamie: Oh yes I
Alice: Yeah and
do you remember how we said we would meet up for a drink and you
never turned up.
Jamie: Oh yeah
I'm so sorry I got a um emergency call that night down at the
Alice: Yeah but
you didn't start until the next week, you got the job thanks to
the interview with me but you didn't start until the week
Jamie looks up
as if trying to remember there is an awkward silence.
anyway it was nice seeing you again and maybe we could go for a
Jamie: Oh I
would love to but I have a choc a block night ahead of me.
to Jamie in pants and t-shirt eating pizza watching the TV and
Alice: Well what
are you doing?
Alice: Oh I see
that's...that's alright then.
Jamie: Sorry you
know it's just she got in there first you know first come...
(Another awkward silence) first served. That's it, I forgot the
um the saying (laughs nervously) sounded almost like I meant
coming literally. Anyway ok then bye.
Jamie walks into
Jamie: Hey Ruby,
anything happen while I was out.
Ruby: Not much,
you were right though that kid has a vocabulary that's dirtier
than the clothes your mate's hooker wears.
Jamie: What? How
did you know about that?
Ruby: He rang up
and asked me about that girl and we got talking. So what's it
like living with a whore?
Jamie: I haven't
yet, although I will tonight. She's not going to stay unless
she's a really subtle prostitute then she's going.
Ruby: What about
Nick? He deserves some love.
Jamie: What are
you talking about he gets women all the time! It should be me
who's going out with a hooker.
Ruby sucks in
through her teeth and Jamie turns around, Dr Matthews is standing
there looking angry.
Come on Peter, unfortunately my hopes were answered.
They walk off
but Peter turns around and makes the wanker sign at him.
Jamie: You see
what the hell is that?
Ruby: It's the
Jamie: No I mean
why does he do that? Where did he even learn it?
don't know. Oh have you ordered the parts yet for Mr
Jamie: God not
you as well!
Ruby: What?! I'm
just saying you should get them soon, sorry I won't mention it
Jamie: No sorry
it's me, it's just I want to give Mrs Smith a punch in the face,
and I probably will if she asks me again.
Ruby sucks in
through her teeth and Jamie turns around, Mrs Smith is standing
Mrs Smith: Well
thank you so much, Dr Stevens let me tell you, when my husband
finally dies I will never return to this hospital. But until then
I am not going to get out of your way until you order those parts
on that phone.
that's not necessary.
Mrs Smith: Oh it
Jamie: It's not
necessary because I've already ordered them.
(suspiciously) what, really?
Jamie: Yes, now
why don't you go and get some of that lovely Twinning's tea
you're so fond of.
Mrs Smith: But
I'm getting bored of it-
and guides her down the corridor.
Jamie: Come on
I'll even lend you some sugar.
Jamie then walks
back to the reception.
that's that taken care of.
Ruby: When did
you order them?
Jamie: I didn't
that's the trick.
Ruby: That's not
so much a trick as a horrible way of making sure someone dies
without getting any extra aid.
Jamie: I suppose
that's just a difference in opinion.
A group of
teenage boys and girls approach, all the boys are dressed in the
same colours with caps as a gang; Candice is at the front with
the leader of them.
Ruby: Can I
Leader of gang:
Yeh, you can 'elp me by telling me where Dr Stevens is.
Ruby: Ah you're
in luck he's just here. That's him, right there
(Nervously) hello there, how can I help?
Leader of gang:
By telling me if this (pointing to Candice) is the girl you've
been 'avin an affair wiv.
Jamie: What! No!
She just came in this morning and started flirting with
Candice: I'm so
sorry Jamie, Ball-zee found out about this morning from one of my
friends, I told him not to bother with you.
you rashist or something? You got a problem wiv my gang
Jamie: No I just
didn't hear her.
you ain't gonna hear nothing when I'm done wiv you. Yo momma's so
ugly she looked out the window and got arrested for
momma's so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her
ankle; they put it around her neck.
that's really horrible you don't even know my mother. Listen I
saved her, she was choking, she would've died!
Really, well let's hope you can save yourself when I pop some
lead in your ass.
Ruby: How dare
you! You can't speak to him like that; you're only, what 12?
You're walking round like a mixture of Eminem and, and help me
out here Jamie who's someone that's violent?
Ruby: How is
action man violent? Anyway you get the idea! You shouldn't be so
violent and gangster at such a young age.
looks at her.
Ball-zee: Fine I
won't hurt him, God. Anyway who's that other slag we need to take
of? Mrs Smith was it?
The gang walks
down the corridor.
Jamie: Wow Ruby
thanks. You were great.
Ruby: Well I
have my moments.
definitely do. You know what, for you I will order those
Ruby: Well you
should've anyway but I'm still impressed, well done.
Jamie picks up
the phone and dials while Ball-zee is seen running away shouting
holding his face
Mrs Smith then
appears holding an empty mug.
Mrs Smith: Think
you can hurt me! I know how to defend myself, hot Twinning's
always does the trick. Dr Stevens could I have a word?
I'll just finish on the phone.
Jamie puts the
phone down and walks into the waiting room.
Mrs Smith: It's
Jamie: Oh what
Mrs Smith: Well
I just saw that young scoundrel running away in pain and I
thought do I want my Edward to be in pain? So I've decided you
were right, you don't have to order the parts, I'm ready for him
Jamie looks at
her for a second then takes a big breath in.
like he's going snap) so...you just decided this did you? Nice.
I'm so glad you didn't stop me on the phone when I was ordering
the actual fucking parts! (Loud and aggressive) all this time
I've been trying to convince you not to get them but no you
insist! You have to get these parts that have scandalous prices!
Well that's alright I'm glad you have now changed your mind! You,
you bitch! You want him to die do you? Well fine he will die come
on let's go and pull the plug on him right now!
Jamie slams open
the door that has an 8 on the front. He then walks around facing
Mrs Smith and pulls out the plugs and leads. Mrs Smith looks in
disbelief. Jamie looks confused as he sees Mrs Jackson sitting
next to him.
Jackson, what are you doing here?
Jamie then looks
at the man he has just killed which is Mr Jackson, Jamie looks up