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Why we all need to have conversations


Submitted:Sep 13, 2008    Reads: 128    Comments: 8    Likes: 1   


The scene....
A misty background, a foggy filled air; looking around I are not sure if it is dark illuminated or light darkened, there is light yet there is no source, slowly I start making out walls and paths that look like corridors, further more I recognize what looks like doors randomly located along these corridor walls. Lastly I see a silhouette figure; I can't really make out the dimensions, as everything in that space seems to be from the same origin, the figure starts becoming more vivid, detaching itself from the surroundings, taking its own shape.

The figure....
As the shape slowly comes to live; I can tell that it is somehow tall, a bit rough at the edges, with what seems to be a mess of hair on that midsized head. I zoom closer, trying to make out the shadow, clearly its male (I just know), looks like he's wearing a coat (I come to this conclusion form the uniformity of the wear ending below the knee). The posture of the figure was not that of strength, of confidence, but of weakness, it looked old, looked tired.

Picture rotates, I now stand in front of the figure, I look for any facial distinction, yet I can't make out any, somehow I only feel that a sad look is drawn on his face

The time....
Time has no rule here, it's neither day nor is it night, I am always at the same moment indefinitely, yet we can see, feel things change around us!

The Story
"Ehm ehmm! Hello! May you help me" I say gently
The figure doesn't move or show reaction that he heard me, suddenly he starts moving fast towards one of the corridors and to a door, stops and it is as if he was looking back to me, then he opens and enters the room.

Heeding what seems to be an invite, I run to the corridor afraid that if I was to be late I would be lost. As I approach the corridor, the light pulsates more strongly and once I entered the light was fully on. Out of breath and what seemed like eternity, I take a glimpse back to where I was, and for my surprise there was a wall behind me, when was there a wall?

Hand on knob, I can hear my heart screaming, slowly I turn the knob and open the door, not forgetting to look for any signs, I can make out "Con......".

"Conscience??" I say to myself, "What does it mean? Where the hell am I?"
The room is pitch dark, oddly yet, at the far corner I can make out the shadow standing there

"Where is this? Who are you?" no answer.

"Why am I here? Am I dead"....still no answer. I gradually get more nervous and aggressively shout "Answer me Dammit", adding a little sneering a like a wounded camel

"Relax, no need to be afraid"
"I am Zelu Krej, you can call me Ze"

"Where is this?"

"This is nowhere and everywhere"

"I don't understand"

"You will eventually"

"Why am I here?"

"Ask yourself that, I've always been here"

"Have I been here before?"

"Yes"

"When?"

"Last time was a few years back, don't you remember"

"............."

" So why are you here Jerkulez?"

"How do you know my name?"

"I know a lot of things about you, you'd be surprised"

"..........."

"So what brings you here"

"I am not sure, I feel heavy at heart, with a burden that shoulders me motionless....."
"Go on..."

"I feel like I am not what I used to be, not the same person"

"You're not, you have changed, and all these times, change has taken its toll on you"

I stared blankly at the empty yet occupied space in front of me

"You are not as pure as you once were, something different is in you, and that's why you are here now"

"......I...I.." words get caught up midway through my vocal cords

"You have grown up, sacrificed old values for new, replaced good with bad"
"Forgot friends, neglected family and abandoned God"
"Your drive for ever more success, for more money, more women, made you change"
"You let go of principals, let go of love, left understanding, threw out compassion"
"Became more scenic, more wicked, more evil"

"St...stoop" I hardly mutter

"Remember that time you passed an old lady, trying to cross a street and you just went on your way as if nothing was, you didn't even think about it, before, you'd help, but now, you have changed"

"Pleaassee, sttooop"

"Remember another time, you didn't pray so you can go to the movies, pray later you thought to yourself, and went to bed without praying it at the end"

".............."

As he continued slowly stated my wrongdoings, I felt weaker, more shameful, couldn't look up
"I'm not all bad, I helped that woman out, when she had a flat tire" I said in defense for myself

"And why did you do so? Wasn't it because you were flirting in process and not out of genuine good"

"Bu....but...but...I helped"

"NOT GOOD ENOUGH", the voice bombarded me, shattering all my defenses

I fell to my knee, hiding my face in my palms "Sorry...sorry...I am sorry"

"Remember 12/05/03, the birthday party........."
"Remember07/10/04, that time at the store......"
.
.
.
.
.
"Remember yesterday, the moment you said those words to your mother and how she cried"
"Look at me and tell me how you feel"

I hold up my face to my astonishment I find the once dark room lit up.
"How...?"

"Each time I stated a wrong deed, it was lifted and the room lit a bit"
"Now stand up, do you still feel burdened?"

I rose on my feet gradually, and an overwhelming feeling of liteness got over me

"Wow, I feel good, that's strange, I feel comforted, feel confident, feel like the old days"
"How did you do this....magic, hypnotism?"

"Conversation" the voice replied, as I made out a hint of a smile in the still dark face

"Am I dead? was that judgment day?"

"No, simply sleeping, simply dreaming"

"Where is this place?"

"The halls of your mind"

A still moment passed as we both looked each other directly, conveying more than words can ever say

".,..And who are you?"

"Doesn't the name Zelu Krej remind you of anything JerKuleZ "

Shockingly I stared as the figure reveals a mirror reflection of myself, but with a confident, strong, healthy stance, different than that of before.

"I am You" pausing for a while as this fact sank into my soul

"Thank you. I have gotten weak over the years for the lack of visits from you, got more burdened for every bad thing you did, and I thought it would be it for me. But after all that time, you finally showed up, again my thanks for giving me back my glory"

We share some laughs, some of the good memories and as I excuse myself to leave, he looks at me "Visit more often, don't let this happen again"

"Promise I will, take care and thank you"

Making my way out of the room, I close the door behind me and started heading towards the exit
Not forgetting, again I take a quick glimpse back, to read that what was on the door sign

"Ahh, that's why, now I know, now I understand"

Camera rotates, then zooms on the door sign......
.
.
.
The sign read "Conscience"







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