As we watch a movie called “Chronicle of the Raven,” on the big couch all bundled up on a Thursday night. What an interesting film to watch, full of nightmares that damage a young woman’s body, voodoo that the grandmother does to keep the house and her health, commentaries because the raven can not live there, and death.
”Hey shady, were going to your aunt’s house are you coming with us?” Said Karen.
“Sorry mom, I can’t I got a lot to do,” I said back.
“ Why do I have to go?” Dan said whine fully,
“ Because, I don’t like driving in the dark you know that.” Said Karen giving Dan a stern look, I mummer a soft giggle.
“ What are you laughing at me for missy,”
“ I’m laughing cause, you don’t want to go, cause you get bored and mom is pissed at you loser.” I start laughing,
“ Shut up shade, and don’t call me a loser I’m your father!”
“ Okay dad, I'm sorry he he he he, well goodbye then you guys, come back okay?,”
“ Yea, don’t worry we will” dad said giving me I’ll be back soon look,
“ okay then go before it gets late alright?" I tell themlike a kindergarden teacher tellsa little kid to do his or her homework.
“ Okay,” mom and dad said as they go down stairs, as dad closed the door sticking his tongue out at me, they leave with my brother and sister in the van.
When I finished my reading for my college level courses and algebra2 homework, I go turn on my computer again and log on into myspace; I send a comment to my lover Jairo. The comment I posted said “Me and your lil’ bro are going to kill you tonight, bad dreams if you sleep tonight…” I look at his picture for a while, his black spiked up hair, mesmerizingmud browneyes, light skin, his buff muscles in his5'7 height body I don't care if he wieghs two-hundred pounds, his darkcasual style, oval shaped head, with big almond shape eyes , with his redish-brown goatee, a nice mixture of irish-mexican blended into a marvalous body. Then I log of his profile and go onto my best friends profile June. God I love her personality is wonderful, it’s hard not to adore her, an attitude that says you mess with and you’ll regret it and fight you without holding back you only live once. However, when she is depressed it breaks your heart and feel like you want to hold her and wipe her tears away, I send her a message that reads, “I miss you and always love you tons!!!!” I do really miss her since she moved to Colorado. I log off it’s 9:30 pm my family hasn’t come home yet, so I go eat cereal apple jacks cereal Yesss. When I finish getting ready to go to sleep I wonder when will they come, as I turn on my radio and turned down the volume to a one, I close my eyes, relax and fall asleep…
It’s a dark morning and I’m getting ready for school. My name is shadow but everyone calls me shade. I’m part vampire and I keep that a secret, I’m five foot two yea I know I’m short, and weigh a hundred and one pounds. I have black curly hair that I straighten, dark brown eyes, light brown skin, and dress dark like a emo, punker, skater mixed together. I live in city called Melville, its where I live. In a city like Melville always carry something useful, like me I carry my precious entity that is my pocketknife it’s my favorite blade. So far my family hasn’t come home, well it’s been 11 hours when my family ditched me, jerks. Wait what’s this, the cops and they’re ringing the dam doorbell fine, I’ll go to them.
“So what’s wrong officers what do you guys want from here?” when I opended the door, there stood a tall officer next to the small officer who were both white.
"Are you Shadow Loredo," said the short officer with his eyes bearly looking at me.
"Yea, I'm shadowLoredo, why? What happen?"
“ Ma’am we need to talk.”The tall white officer said with his eyes piercing at me.
“ Talk I didn’t attack anybody or vandalize anything, so tell me what you were going to tell me?” they looked at one another shaking theirs heads.
“Ma’am there has been a tragic accident… involving your family… they died in a car crash…”
The tall officer said to me with a morning voice not wanting to give me the bad news“Those jerks died! Well thanks for the news so leave now and let think through what you just told me.” As I slam the door on their faces.
They left looking at me like as if I were a freak oh well, its fun seeing their reaction. My family died that’s kind of funny hahhaha, haahaahaa, aaaaahhh they fucking died! Why! Why couldn’t I die with them, plus the rest of my family is crappy, they could never take me except for one, but I wouldn’t want to be a burden to my uncle Pablo.Besides I’m sixteen almost time for me to become an adult.
Tears are accumulating around my eyes trying not to cry but, I couldn’t hold it in any more, I begin to cry uncontrollably. I go get a family picture in the hall way closet and look at them tears streaming down my face. I know I can’t pay for the bills even if I get a job. Then, I check the time on my cell phoneit’s 5:30 am. I finish getting ready for school fast and run outside, I run to the other side of the highway to see any bus that may take me tomy school. I must be crazy but it’ll take my mind out the bad news I just received. I go to school on the public bus, and I’m proud of myself for not getting lost.I’m attending school hour after hour. As every moment passes by I find living futile more than ever, I don’t tell the tragic news I received to my lover Jairo. Jairo is a year older than me he’s a senior and I’m a junior in Boswell high school. He’s good guy inside even though he is a “bad” person he tells me, but he can act like a jerk when he wants to. The last school bell rang and it’s now after school I go the area I always meet him at the school cafeteria tables outside and I'll tell him when were face to face,
“ I’ll go to your house” I tell randomly when hes in front of my face,
he responds back “why aren’t you going home?”
“ What home I don’t have a home now.” I tell him twisting the ends of my hair with my index finger gently with my eyes down with a serious look on my face.
“ What! You have a home why are you saying that?” he said shocked and giving me a worried look his eyes grow big, his forehead creases, he places his hands on my small shoulders and looks focusly at my face.
“ I got news that… that my family… died in a car accident…” Itell him trying not to look at his piecering worriedeyes.
Tears start falling down my face and hug him digging my face on his chest, my arms wrapping around his warm chest . “When did this happen?” Jairo asked me still hugging me wanting to wipe away my tears and look at me.
“ Last night, I got the news early in the morning,” still holding him as he wipes my tears away when I face him. We take the bus to my house, after getting some of my things; we take the bus again and head to his house. I go outside his house and begin to walk it’s 6’o clock and I’m still walking no one noticed I left, yet my other family must be worried about me I don’t care I’ll be an adult soon anyways.
As I begin to walk with my head down, and listen to my music from my mp3, I think to myself depressed and emo state of mind My life is broken mirrors as every moment I breathe. I walked for so long I don’t know where I am. My family is dead, I’m going to lose my home soon, and life sucks more than ever. I see an abandoned building, and head towards it I could sleep there and it’s so cold, night has fallen. Well I guess I’ll cover up until morning comes, I can’t find my way back it’s too dark out, the only thing I have with me is my blade, mp3, and my almost useless cell phone. No one is standing there with me I’m left to fend for my life now. I’m so alone tonight I don’t think I will survive this night. No one here is to either aid nor protect me, why did I have to walk. I sit down near the abandoned building and still thinking inside my mind listening to Hawthorne Heights, Ohio is for lovers. I begin to cut myself on my right arm deeply and at pace to cope with the depression, cutting and thinking things though. “Life is bleeding inside me like toxic contamination there’s no way to stop it. I wish I were strong enough to fend for myself to defend myself. I wish I had confidence in myself without being told so I should, but how?Life is full of resistance and ache but why is it so pleasurable for me, why is it so needed… why? Why did they die so soon? All the pieces of life have cut me so; it feels so… delightful and stunning.” My voice is in a whisper not knowning if anyone is near, and I there is I wouldn't want them to hear me.
I stop cutting my right arm, and look at it the blood streaming down dripping off onto the ground, what is this feeling that tingles down my course of my body. My nervous system is being shut down I’m turning numb… numb… I cut my self so deep, I’m losing too much blood but Iplace my hand on it applying pressure on it. It slows down but I feel light headed, I turn off my mp3 and fall asleep or I think I fell asleep… when I put away my blade hoping all of this was just a dream...This glow where is it coming from it’s getting close, closer who or what is that dark outline behind the glow? …