The Sweet Moon
I can’t grasp you directly as
my fingers are fragile
but my mind is strong
Fingers of hands caring stroke
your shoulders and coil into
your forearms with a cream
of black current and fig.
Would a scorpion still
jutter on your swelling surface
if dialogue escaped
and epoch of touch was the ambience
My thumbs socialize your temples
Sweet Moon your laugh is last as you
are not tied to an earthly base
with no mating ritual to be amplified
Flailing, an omega blow fish looked up
from below the facade
pursed her blow fish lips and
mollified in The Sweet Moon
ok peachy I’m going to keep my comment short today. I always waffle on about what the poem means to me, but usually miss the point. Ok, in saying that this poem speaks to me of love, longing, nature, universe, imagination, peachy, mussy? humm..not too sure, yeah, why not, theres a bit of that in there, sensual, yes…what else? pops off for another read!
Right, so your fingers are fragile but your mind strong. Conflicting images; one speaks of the mushy but I’d like to call it loving side of nature, the strong mind might be the strength of our being in respect of not getting too close for fear of being hurt. Well, it might not mean this exactly but it as that strength of personality thing about it. (Oh, by the way I just adore the moon, I have 6 tattoo’s of her all down my arm) But that lovingness comes into chapter two when she/you is taken into the moons strong arms. Oh, peachy wants some love!! (sorry about that, the suns been out today and you know what they say about mad dogs and Englishmen?)
So scorpion and swelling surface speak of pain, but this is again followed by an image of sweet touch/caress/love. So there is a sensual touchy feel to the poem. Also the idea of the universe or out of earthly sphere comes into play. Oh sweet moon is your are you not guided by earthly emotions, but no, you are of the cosmos, a higher sense of consciousness, almost spiritual. But could you be of the imagination? That almost sensual high one gets from the imagination. A plane of existence beyond our natural state? Humm..do I sound a little crazy? Well the blow fish also feels like a metaphor for this orgasmic trance like state. This poem works on several levels for me. There’s an earthly realm of sweet tender love, also a sensual realm which is both earthly and of a high state of consciousness; a world of the imagination; a vision; a journey; both within and beyond our natural being. Well pearchy this is what the moon does to me. Ok I wrote a little long comment and I really waffled, but your poem took me on one hell of a journey. Coming back down to earth he desires only water!!
Posted: Jun 9, 2008
See, I am back, as I promised!
First of all, the poem appeared more psychedelic to me than metaphoric, with the latter being just a beautiful and worthwhile by-product! I can relate to that part, because most of my normal(?) thinking also goes in the same line.
Now to the poem ....
The sweet moon definitely represents a person, but not just any person - he is the ultimate and the most fulfilling event that has ever happened in her life. Theirs was the most complete union, in mind, body and spirit, something that comes only once in a lifetime. Unfortunately, now he is beyond reach. She still longs for him and grasps him indirectly with her strong mind.
She wants to give him tenderness, by stroking his shoulders with caring hands; but she is not just a coy female interested in an insipid, platonic love - she wants to taste the essence of him. She is a ravenous vixen at the same time with the same fingers which had previously caressed him, now coiling into his forearms to dig into him, taste him....
The third stanza reflects on how madly exciting and all-consuming their sexual connection used to be, but a long time has passed since then and she wonders that if they were together again, would things still be the same.
She wants to soothe him, but there is also a repressed anger in her mind. She resents the fact that while she is tied down to her earthly duties, he is above it all and being indifferent to her situation.
She seethes with anger and pain for a while, but in the end she takes a deep breath, decides to vent it all out and let it go, and be happy and content with the memories.
I also think that even though she has let go, the memories do return to haunt her, just like the moon rises every night, well, almost.
Posted: Jun 10, 2008
Mushy peach, something just occurred to me... the moon is full of promise, something you can trust in to be there right? I know that's the title you were given, but you talk to the moon as if a lover. This makes me think you’ve been let down in the past. Having faith in humanity is never easy and I have to admit that right now, the moon is my mistress... for a better word! :)
Anyway, just thought I'd stop by, this one is still simmering away in my head! ~ Nixie
Posted: Jun 11, 2008
Hey again sexy. Wow, I can't believe that you haven't had anything professionally published yet. I've read highly regarded anthologies of contemporary poetry and many of the poems contained there-in don't even compare to this piece. I try to make my comments as useful as possible but i can't think of anything to say about this piece, or at least not anything that hasn't already been said before. I'll just go down the usual list then shall i; perfect rhythm and meter, you seem to have no taste for rhyme which works well in your writing(Myself and others are often guilty of weighing work down with rigid, un-nessacary rhyme) brilliant use of metaphor, the imagery is so strange and peculiar(which for the record is a great thing, don't change it) and yet so intensely vivid, "My thumbs socialize your temples" for example is absolutely brilliant. The mood, like many have said, is a perfect mix of raw sensuality and romanticism. I have never read anything that quite maintains that intensity of mood before. I feel stupid for not being able to offer you anything more constructive than flattery. Have you submitted this piece to any writing competitions yet? Because if your looking to get professional published, well i've been told that winning or even comming close, in a reputable writing competition is one way to get prospective publishers to pay attention to your work. Overall great stuff peach, I will endeavor to read some of your longer pieces when i get the time. It's been a pleasure.
Posted: Oct 12, 2008
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