I woke up. Fairly late, even for a man like me. The sunlight dappled through the dilapidated skylight embedded in the roof of my room. I could hear the crumbling of walls as the world fell apart in front of my eyes. The only light at the end of the tunnel was John, my sweet, lovely, handsome John!
Ever since that memorable day, when I stumbled into his practice. You see I had just changed doctors. His predecessor had left after claiming he was being stalked. Nothing was proved. Anyway, I walked into his practice; sat in the waiting room. I seem to remember that there was an interesting article on a Science Editor called Joe something; I couldn't remember his surname. I had read some of his work before and wanted to meet him. But sadly, I knew this would never be.
Back to John, as he opened the door to his office, I felt the whole world lift as an angel stood before my eyes. From then on, every time we met, he sent me little signals, like waves of his hand, a nod. Many would think this was him being polite and friendly, but we both knew it was our secret language. Our secret love. Many months past and we kept running into each other. It was almost like clockwork. Outside his practice, every morning without fail. It was our special meetings. However one day he had vanished. He didn't turn up! I decided to go and ask for him in his practice; but I was met with a friendly "Hello" from his backstabbing receptionist, who clearly had a hidden agenda. I managed to get an answer soon enough. "It's his day off; he has gone for a walk in the fields." He clearly wanted me to follow him. I'm on a treasure hunt and he's the chest of gold at the end.
I entered into the fields from the east. It was bright and luminous, with a relaxing breeze coming from the west. It hit my face, my hair waving back behind me. Then I found my gold. It was john; he was running towards me ready to embrace me and leave his wife like I had suggested on so many occasions. Suddenly I heard "Jump!" It was coming from above. A hot air balloon had gone astray, whistling through the air on a highway of intermittent gale force winds. I had nearly lost my footing, had it not been for the warmth in my heart that was emitted whenever I saw John.
I noticed that there were more people approaching from the distance. There were 4 others. Two of which, looked to be farmers. And then a mystery man, I recognised him but couldn't quite pull out a name. He was smartly dressed and had an ora of intelligence around him. He was perfect! But following quite closely behind him was a woman. By the state of her it must have been his sister. Why would a man as perfect as him have such a mongrel for a lover. I just doesn't make sense!
At that point I re-engaged with the situation at hand; by this point all 5 of us were almost in contact with the stray dog; as it dragged its bottom across the earth. I didn't even notice John. We had all got hold of the balloon. However, one gust of wind had thrusted the balloon off the ground. We were now holding onto the balloon by our fingertips. Fighting for grip that just wasn't there. Suddenly, there was a cry for help. Momentarily, the world had frozen as we came to realise that there was a small child curled up in the basket. He must have only been about 10. But then the grip had disappeared. We started dropping like flies; as one by one we were thrown to the ground by the blustering winds. It must have only been a few seconds; but it seemed like a lifetime.
We all watched as the balloon started to take off into the distance. Still hearing the constant cries of "help!" which were met by such little concern. It was then I noticed John, my John, still hanging onto the basket. He hung perfectly still along the line of the rope, with all his energy concentrated on his weakening grip. Still the balloon was rising and rising; it must have been at least 100 feet up. Then, like a rabbit in a magic act, it disappeared into the distance. Our view had been obscured by a forest of trees. They swayed furiously from side to side; making peering through the gaps to become increasingly impossible. "Thud" as a sound could be heard from the distance. It was from the direction of the balloon. We rushed through the forest; it felt like we were being whipped by a slave-trader in ancient times, as the branches of the trees hit us in every imaginable place. We emerged from the forest not 1 minute later and we were greeted by a battlefield. Blood covering a large proportion of the field where the old dog laid to rest. We were stood on top of a small hill, looking down on the battlefield, like a buzzard stalks his pray from the skies. All frozen to the spot, out of horror, we convened to decide on a plan. We all stood together, the mystery man was whispering to his sister. I couldn't overhear. Suddenly he spoke "I'm going down to him. Is anyone coming?" I thought about it, but I was waiting for that moment when everyone pulls up their socks and is brave. But it never happened. Everyone stood completely still, with faces of ignorance and cowardness. By this time, the man had already left, walking purposefully down the hill; to what awaited him, no one could comprehend. I decided I couldn't let him do this alone and, without a word, I set of in pursuit. Almost jogging down the hill. I must have been going too fast as a slipped over to the side. Managing to stop myself taking part in a charity hill roll by clasping onto a tree trunk. Eventually we had both arrived at the scene. I couldn't believe that God could create such chaos and dishonour for a man of Mr Logan's importance.
Upon seeing Mr Logan's body, I could barely stay sane. I looked for comfort and release from this moment off the mystery man. But all I was met with was a "sorry. I'm Joe, not your girlfriend." It then hit me; he was the science editor I had read about all those weeks ago. Of course I had never seen a picture of him, but I was certain. I ceased my opportunity to have him, while he was vulnerable from the current debacle. I decided to show him who I am. I walked gingerly closer to the corpse of Mr Logan. Got down onto my knees and prayed for him. Prayed for the Lord to forgive any sins he may have committed. It was the right thing to do. But for some reason Joe was confused. There was a glazed look engulfing his face.
Suddenly I heard a rustle of grass. It originated from behind me. I turned in curiosity. Wondering what the source of the noise was. I was surprised by the answer that awaited me. It was the sound of a coward. Joe had decided he couldn't take anymore. That he had to walk away from me before he became magnetised to me. Before he admitted his true feelings to himself. I rushed to my feet, eager to persuade him to stay; with me to discuss how we were going to be together. As I hastily walked to Joe's left shoulder I decided to approach this in a very patient, understanding manner. "Please don't dismiss this." Were the first words that came to my ever untactful mouth. There was an instant response, "look, I'm sorry. I'm going back to see my friend." It was now clear. Clear as the sky in which we were stood under. This woman was not his mongrel sister as I once assumed, but his girlfriend. I could tell she was special to him by the way he walked towards her, like a teenage boy. I couldn't comprehend however why he hadn't shared her name with me. Was it out of shame? I hadn't noticed that Joe had turned, he was now facing me directly; "OK fine. Please just have the courtesy to tell me this." The pause in the conversation just excited my desire. Every nanosecond was a moment I could have shared with Joe. I couldn't wait any longer. "Do you know yourself what it is?" there was no reply. So I walked towards him, ready to embrace him. At this point I saw Joe's gaze was not on me, but upon something that was happening to my rear. As I turned my head, I lay gaze on two police officers trying to hoist their appalling bodies over a gate, in order to set in motion the official proceeding of John Logan's Fate. This only spurred my desire on even more. Our time together has been cut short. I must see him again. I have to. We must be together, no matter what…